Dissatisfying Sex Life

Discussion in 'Gay Group Messages' started by Chris_RC, Nov 3, 2019.

  1. Chris_RC

    Chris_RC Members

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    My whole adult life, I’ve always been dissatisfied with sex. I mean, it’s enjoyable, I have fun, it feels good, but it’s not as satisfying as I want it to be.

    I think this stems from childhood sex abuse I endured. I compare my sex life now to the sex I was having then. At the time, I didn’t understand that I was having sex and I didn’t even fully understand the concept of sex, but because I willingly participated and never felt fearful in those moments, I never had a negative feeling toward doing those things. And even now, looking back I don’t think of those as bad times in my life, but at the same time I am ashamed of it. I don’t know if that makes sense. But I think those experiences when I was younger get in the way of me being able to fully enjoy sex now.

    Has anyone gone through anything similar, and do you have any advice?
     
  2. Irminsul

    Irminsul Valkyrie

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    No, I enjoy a thriving sex life.
     
  3. tumbling.dice

    tumbling.dice Visitor

    Sex without love gets boring, for sure.
     
    Curious wife and dd788snipe like this.
  4. Irminsul

    Irminsul Valkyrie

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    I feel the complete opposite. Sex for love is sooo 1930s.
     
  5. tumbling.dice

    tumbling.dice Visitor

    I'm ole fashioned.
     
  6. soulcompromise

    soulcompromise Member

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    I am not dissatisfied, really. I feel like getting laid is unimportant, and at my age probably a little bit immature. I'm 39. What do I expect? A twenty year old to take interest? For what? Money? Lol. :D I would be delusional.
     
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  7. I'm a troll

    I'm a troll Banned

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    daddy issues, for one. it does happen, probably sometimes for perfectly legitimate reasons as well.

    also, is there a reason you couldn't sleep with someone your own age?
     
  8. soulcompromise

    soulcompromise Member

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    mostly because they are in a relationship already/don't know where they gather en masse. :D
     
  9. I'm a troll

    I'm a troll Banned

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    fair, i do have that problem too. a majority of my relationships are with younger women too, largely for that reason. i do have an advantage in that i sometimes work with kids, so i get the opportunity to meet single moms sometimes. but that's not ideal either; a lot of times when a woman becomes a mom she seems to lose some of her own personality and everything just becomes about momming. which is fine and kind of necessary for being a good parent, but it also means that i, single guy with no kids, probably won't have a lot in common with her.

    there is always online dating, if nothing else.
     
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  10. soulcompromise

    soulcompromise Member

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    I hate it. But I keep going back to that. If I go to the trouble of posting a pic and keeping a profile I'm sure someone will pity me.

    Is this in the gay forum? I'm totally straight! wtf am I doing! :D Sorry all.
     
  11. I'm a troll

    I'm a troll Banned

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    hey, pity sex is still sex. but you might even find someone who is legitimately interested.
     
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  12. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    Lolz, you made me laugh.

    Thats one aspect of heterosexuals I have always found perculiar.

    Guys like you, women your age dont try as they just expect you to be hooking up with 22 yr olds. But girls that age are a pain in the ass

    Only come in one of three varietys: 1. already single moms; 2. strong with the daddy issues; or 3. petrifyed of having sex because all their girlfriends got pregnant within 6 months of getting a boyfriend

    Which leads to hooking up with a 22 yr old, being seen as a cradle snatcher by many and also 1. Having her talk about kids non stop 2. That weird moment where she brought two sweaters for the price of one, gives one to you, the other one to her dad or 3. Never actually puts out.

    And its like everyone else is blind to that being the way it is, or pretend not to see it
     
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  13. Irminsul

    Irminsul Valkyrie

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    I couldn't see myself with a girl 10 years younger than me. Not for a relationship.
     
  14. Irminsul

    Irminsul Valkyrie

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    Maybe if I was 42.
     
  15. I'm a troll

    I'm a troll Banned

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    maybe fewer guys my age would be hooking up with 22 year olds if women my age did try though. but they just talk about their kids and hook up with single dads in their 40s.
     
  16. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    Yeah, when I was 20, prime target was buff guys 27-35, who I hooked up with on occasions. But when I got to that age range, started to wonder about those guys , once I had the odd 20 year old coming at me and Im wondering, fuck, was I that annoying at 20? The answer being yes I was
     
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  17. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    Oh, it will still happen in your 40s if they think the 22 yr olds will want you.

    You arent proper husband material if they think they have to fight off the 20 somethings

    Bit of a laugh....well, for me that is, not so much for you if you just want to settle down
     
  18. Irminsul

    Irminsul Valkyrie

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    Yeah lolz although I maintain I'm still the same person sometimes I look at younger people and I'm like what the fuck is wrong with you. :tearsofjoy:

    I mean I'm attracted to 22 year olds don't get me wrong, but I'm also attracted to like 42yo too and for me personally at this stage in my life.. I mean it's dumb by now to assume I'm going to learn anything new from anybody.. But I kinda like being the younger woman seen as guide to teach or experience an older woman, especially one who's just come out of a marriage and desperately looking to make up for lost time, that's where I'm like 0o0o0o0o0hhhh
     
  19. I'm a troll

    I'm a troll Banned

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    is that why the dad bod is such a fad these days?
     
  20. Irminsul

    Irminsul Valkyrie

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    I'm gonna find me a reckless woman
    Razor blades and dimes in her eyes
    With just a touch of sadness in her face
    Thunder and lightening goodbyes. :)

    And we're gonna ride, we're gonna ride
    Ride like the one eyed Jack of diamonds with the devil close behind, we're gonna ride..
     

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