Disposing of a dead body

Pillsbury Doughboy squeezing off a loaf. That's ripe!

 

This woman would know, did it in REAL LIFE,






1. Katherine Knight – Kills Husband and Eats Him.


This lady, Katherine Knight stabbed his poor husband 37 times with a butcher’s knife then skinning him and hanged his body with a meat hook in their lounge room.

Katherine, the first Australian woman to be sentenced to a natural life term without parole. She had a history of violence in relationships.

She mashed the dentures of one of her ex-husbands and slashed the throat of another husband’s eight-week-old puppy before his eyes. A heated relationship with John Charles Thomas Price became public knowledge with an Apprehended Violence Order that Price had filed against Knight.

She stabbed Mr Price 37 times with a butcher’s knife before skinning him and hanging his hide from a meat hook in their lounge room back in 2000.

She then decapitated him and put his head in a pot on the stove, baked flesh from his buttocks and cooked vegetables and gravy as side dishes to serve to Mr Price’s children. Police found the macabre dinner before the adult children arrived home.(canadiancrc.com).

 

lmao!

 

Yeah, it's always easy to jump on the judging-bandwagon. But did anyone ever think to stop and ask her why she's so mad? I'm guessing NOT!

 

Why not just tie the body to the undercarriage of your neighbor's car (a neighbor you don't like very much) while it's parked at the local bar some night? Let them try talking their way out of that one.

 

Preparation:
1) Get a white coat,
2) Get a wheelchair,
3) Get a Blanket.
Methodology:
a) Transport them to a hospital,
b) Wheel them in
c) Park up in a corridor ... and walk away (discreetly and carefully)
For:-
One has to be cautious, one has to take care,
There's always an onlooker, who is bound to be there

 

OK, you'll need a small boat or canoe with an electric troller moter installed. You will also need to weld a handgun to the inside of the canoe in such a way that it is pointing at the bottom of the canoe. Also, weld a good-sized hunk of steel to the bottom of the boat. Next, take an old fashioned, wind-up alarm clock and weld it to the inside of the boat just above the pistol. Then connect one end of a length of fishing line to the wind-up key of the alarm clock, and the other end to the trigger of the gun. As the wind-up key slowly unwinds, it will take up the slack in the fishing line and eventually pull the trigger, which will put a hole in the canoe and send it to the bottom of a lake or the ocean.


Now all you have to do is secure the body inside the canoe with a length of chain, load the canoe onto your pick up, and head for the ocean or lake after dark. And don't go over the speed limit, and make sure your brake-lights and all that stuff is working; you really don't want to fuck up at this point, or you'll have a story to tell your grandchildren alright, but not one that will reflect kindly on your intellect. I don't think I have to explain the rest. Oh, and bring another handgun . . . in case of unwanted witnesses; one never knows. And if that does happen, don't sweat it; a canoe will easily hold two bodies.


And you'll want to choose a deep lake. Might I suggest one of the Great Lakes? They're deep, and there's lots of hotels situated along the shore line in case you want to get a room and a bottle of liquor and drink yourself to sleep. If it's your first time, choose something that's 100 proof. My first time, I chose 140 proof rum. But don't worry, after the first couple of times, wine (13%) will do the trick.

 

Have a nice family dinner.

 

:devil:666 post

 

I still love the idea of owning a fish tank at home with piranhas and just throw the body in there...

your own homemade food garbage disposal

 

Having had the honor cremation is efficient

 

and you get to fertilize the garden

 

"what the world needs now is more fertilizer...it's the only thing that there is just too little of....'....oops, don't mind me....lmao

 

Howabout disposing the dead body in the alienating universe which the living scientist laves a symposium; I exist he claims for no dead body; I thought the dead body disposed would stop existing with or without the scientist's approving claim. Damn it, which is the derivable non-existence of the dead body? A cop talking to me. :bobby:

 

i would prefer to leave it up to the proper authorities to handle such things.
i'm not saying there's anything in nature that makes them proper, but if they exist and they exist to hadle such things, i'd just as soon let them then for me to have to.

 

put a suit and tie on them and drop them off at the Russell Senate Office Building.. nobody will even notice.

 

Take a hike.

 

The best trick ever: befriend a pig farmer. Pigs are omnivorous and will eat anything you give them, really, they don't discriminate. Just chop that corpse in small pieces and feed it to the pigs, first the proof will disappear in no time and second there will never be a murder legally speaking, as by law you need a corpse to start a murder investigation. Until a body is found, only a disappearance will be reported...

 

send the body to the past in a time-machine, before the person was born,

 

Stand it up, cover it with wax and use it as a lawn ornament. (might want to put it in the shade though.)