Dirty Jokes

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Annwyn'Bri, May 3, 2014.

  1. rjhangover

    rjhangover Senior Member

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    So Broony gets a date, and gets her in bed. When she touches his small penis she asks, "Who do you think you're going to satisfy with that?" Broony says, "Me!"
     
  2. deleted

    deleted Visitor

    What do you call the useless skin around a vagina?.

    a woman..
     
    tumbling.dice likes this.
  3. puggybear

    puggybear stars may twinkle-but I shine!

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    I caught a couple of thieves trying to steal my satnav - I told them to get lost!
     
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  4. Rots in hell

    Rots in hell Senior Member

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    A rather ‘frustrated’ woman went to the supermarket to try to take her mind off her overly erotic thoughts.
    As she moved through the aisles she saw bananas and apples and so many things that made her recall rather than forget her erotic mood.

    She ended up buying far more than she needed.

    When she arrived at the checkout there was a young man packing bags.

    As he packed her bags his muscles gleamed under the fluorescent lights, and she could make out the contours of his fit body under his tight
    T-shirt and trousers. She could hardly control herself.

    After she paid, she asked the young man if he could help her to her car with her many heavy bags of groceries.

    The young man willingly obliged.

    As they walked through the car-park the lady finally lost control.
    She placed her hand on the young man’s bum and said “I have an itchy pussy”.

    To which the young man replied “You’ll have to show me where it is because all these Japanese cars look the same to me."
     
    GLENGLEN likes this.
  5. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    I dont get it
     
  6. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    Thats a dad joke, not a dirty joke
     
  7. Rots in hell

    Rots in hell Senior Member

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    Why does that not surprize me ?
     
    Eric! likes this.
  8. Rots in hell

    Rots in hell Senior Member

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    This is a dad Joke !
    I've just got first place in a national bullshitting competition.

    Well,I actually came 12th.

    To be honest,there wasn't even a competition.
     
    Eric! likes this.
  9. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    Can you explain it then, is there a brand of japanese car thats supposed to sound like itchy pussy or something?

    Hopefully I'm being dumb in this instance, and not that the joke is so bad it wasnt worth all this effort
     
  10. GLENGLEN

    GLENGLEN Banned

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    OUCH....OUCH....And OUCH Again......:frowning:



    Cheers Glen.
     
  11. Rots in hell

    Rots in hell Senior Member

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    Its not a joke if you have to explain it :tonguewink:
    not being funny !
     
  12. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    I have no idea

    Horny chic says I have itchy pussy, guy says show me where it is, all japanese cars look the same

    ???
     
  13. Rots in hell

    Rots in hell Senior Member

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    VG you are making one of us look Dumb !
    and guess who it isn't ?
     
  14. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    Billy was 14 and just started jerkin off. He loved to jerk off. However, one day, his dad walked in on him while he was jerkin off! Billy was so embarrassed. He pulled up his pants as quick as he could. But, his dad already seen him.

    "Billy," said his dad, "doing that will make you go blind"

    "Dad," he replied, "I'm over here!"
     
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  15. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    Mitsubishi is supposed to sound like itchy pussy?

    That is so lame
     
    TheGhost likes this.
  16. Rots in hell

    Rots in hell Senior Member

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    No Lame is making a thing of it !
    But nobody can tell you though because you are so fucking smart mate
     
  17. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    Ok, its the funniest joke ever

    Mitsu bishi totally sounds like itchy pussy, dont know what I was thinking
     
  18. Rots in hell

    Rots in hell Senior Member

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    Lets have a look at your joke then !
    how could billy's dad have seen him Jerkin off if he didn't even know where in the room he was ?
     
  19. Vanilla Gorilla

    Vanilla Gorilla Go Ape

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    Now, that made me laugh
     
  20. GLENGLEN

    GLENGLEN Banned

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    My Guess Is He Was Making A Lot Of.....Ahhh...Ahhh Owhhhh Noises .......:smilecat:



    Cheers Glen.
     

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