dead end

This is a hard one. My wife and I were in a simular position(without the video games). I think it is almost a form of depression. Anyway, when faced with losing my wife, I realized that a lot of my actions (ignoring requests, ect) and anger were not because of her just the easiest way to let it out. Since then though the little things have become the greatest as stated before. I used to sleep until just right before I had to get up for work, now we get up early watch the news and discuss whats going on, ect. I have noticed that now she will grab me and we run off for a quicky then do dishes together. We had many talks before and all I can say it took the actually thought of losing her to quit taking advantage of what we provide to each other. Not sure that I could recommend what we went through though, it was some hard times. In the end it snapped me out of my self delusioned "depression" though and I feel wanted again. This all happened about 3 years back and all has been great since.

 

ok, I haven't replied back to this yet so here goes...

I plan things and suggest things all the time. He doesn't want to go anywhere because he either doesn't want to drag all of the kids out or he doesn't want to drive anymore (part of his job has him driving half the day). So I'll suggest things like movies which he says no to also(he gets bored of them). Last summer we rented at least one hotel room a week, sometimes a room a couple times a week, it ate up alot of money... this is also where the 3rd unplanned child came from, lol. Our sex life is the same as its always been, we have sex everyday at least once... that part of life has not changed. I don't use babysitters because I breastfeed our baby and I'm just not comfortable with leaving someone I don't know well or a teenage with 2 rambuncious (sp?) toddlers and a newborn. I can hardly handle it somedays and I'm their mother! lol. And I'd like to add to the person who said "this is what happens when you have kids your age". This has nothing to do with us having kids and being in our early 20s... many married couples go through low points. Especially married couples with childern. Age has nothing whatsoever to do with how we have fun or whatnot. We both take care of our childern and love them very much the same as every other person in the world who has childern... Having kids no matter what age you are is a struggle and sometimes stressful but it is always worth it and thats how we feel. Neither one of us feel trapped, we've discussed this. We've had the option to not keep our daughter and even let his parents raise the kids... thats not what the issue was. No one thought we could do it be4 we had our daughter... obviously we've proved them wrong. Chris owns his own business and we are not financially stuck or in debt so thats not the issue. The last poster said something about depression... I think thats more along the lines of how he feels. Hes been depressed because he works so much I think. He has also recently lost alot of his friends to drugs... (like coke) so I think he may even been blaming himself for not being there for them more. I feel bad for him but I do realize that we need to somehow work a day in for ourselves. I've discussed this with him since I've posted this and I pretty much told him in nicer words that I'm leaving if he doesn't want to put effort into our relationship. We communicate great together when we talk, we discuss not fight but its a matter of me calming myself before hand so I can put my feelings out to him the right way. Hope I replied to everyone.

Relayer- Riley will be 3 months old this monday. Yes we should hang out soon. I'd love for Jack and Riley to meet. He must be getting big, he was so small last time I saw him.

 

earthy, what are you guys doing tomorrow? It is my 21st birthday, and we have kristens dad's property to do whatever we want, theres pool table and inside area and fire stoves outside, and guess what NONE of my friends are coming! They all cancelled on me last night. So maybe we could all hang out there! You could even bring your kids if your worried about someone else watching them. And her parents are supa cool, I dont know let me know if you want to, because otherwise im just getting a six pack and sitting at home!