Cuckolded?? What should I do?

Ok, so I have been with my GF for over 4 years now and everything has been great for the most part. For the past year we have been living in different cities but still see each other a decent amount (1 or 2 weekends a month) and talk every if not ever other day. Over the past several months I started getting a weird vibe from her. She has always had a lot of close guy friends which I've never been thrilled about but whatever. However, she has started talking about one in particular a lot which is weird cause I don't care and I don't want to constantly hear about "how cool" etc ____ is and I make it known that I don't want to hear about it. But now I've been noticing she talks to him a ton text/snapchat etc. --Like more than she does me which is very annoying. The last time I went to visit her I stayed in to study and hang with her and it was my understanding that that was the plan for the night. Then around 9 she starts texting and then starts changing and says she going to her friends party just for a little bit. Assuming that meant "we" were going I said "well I kinda wanted to just hang with you and really need to study tonight". She responded yeah I know that's ok you just stay here and I'll go for a hour or so, it's _____'s birthday and I just need to make an appearance. So she leaves and I stay there and hours pass and she's not back. After a while I started texting then calling and got no answers. Eventually she sends a vague incoherent text saying she will be back in 30 min (at about 1145-midnight). At about 1-130 she still wasn't back and wasn't answering and I ended up going to bed shortly after. The next morning when I woke up she was making breakfast and her guy friends that she clearly likes was sleeping on the couch. It was totally awkward and he left right after he woke up. When I asked her about it/everything about the night before she claims she got back around two, she drove her friend home but he was locked out of his apartment so she said he could sleep on the couch at her place. She claims she slept in bed with me but I know that it is a lie because I would've have woke up and then she switched her story to that she fell asleep on the chair in the living room while they were watching TV after they got back... Again I would have heard the TV and got up. That day we went to get lunch and two of her girl friends i have never met joined us. Upon being introduced one said to my gf "so this is the cuckold huh and chuckled" not knowing what she said I said What? and she said nothing giggling - it was really weird. To wrap this up when I left town later that day and got home and I searched Cuckold and I'm still not entirely sure I get what it means but either way it doesn't sound good. I called her out on it and on all this bull shit with her guy friend and she claims she doesn't know why her friend said the cuckold thing and it must of been some joke or something (she basically made no sense) and that she never has done anythign with her guy friend and never will and she only wants to date me etc etc but she also was contradicting saying she wants to see where her friendship with that guy goes etc ... so IDK I'm like what F$%* does that mean. * Also, I recently have noticed she hardly ever wants to have sex when we are together----Is she sleeping with this guy? am I a cuckold? is she trying to make me a cuckold? WTF is a cuckold? What should I do? Should I do anything?

 

She's fucking him, you should leave her. I don't really know why you're posting this here.

 

Yep dump the bitch, she must think you are stupid.... It's pretty obvious ... Find someone that actually cares about you

Sent from my Galaxy far far away....

 

I voted "Be her cuckold" just because it's so rare you hear the word cuckold. Maybe they've all noticed how you feel about the situation and are just teasing you a bit.

 

Reading your story it looks like she is cheating. Having sex with someone else when in relationship is different, but here she is trying to hide that means she don't care about you any longer. Leave her, I know it is hard doing than saying if you really like her.

Sent from my Nexus 5 using Tapatalk

 

It is a term for a man who's partner is sleeping with other men, sometimes with his knowledge, sometimes not.
You figure it out from there.

 

Hypothetically if I told her that if that's what she must do then she she can but must be honest about it .. that way trust can at least be restored.. Would that be different/Can that work in a relationship - Her getting it out of her system or w/e. or is our relationship doomed in that scenario?

 

Don't let her walk all over you, fool

 

Reading this makes me think you may just be willing to be what her friends were calling you! You need to grow a pair and end this nonsense. How are you going to respect yourself when she is not showing you any?

 

i'm not sure if i've ever "heard" the word, but it appears non-stop on these forums.

i can't believe i'm the first person here that ignored the wall of text.

 

The only time I've ever heard it (read it) was in the story of Othello. It's Elizabethan era lingo.

 

Trust can't be restored, because even if you said her seeing and having sexual relations with other guys is okay by you, she'd only be admitting her true actions to you based on a green light that she can tell you the truth without consequences.

If I were you I'd get myself and STD check, and I might to some stalking to find or confirm truths and lies she was saying.

Listen to your gut on this one and straight-up confront her and ask her to prove she's telling the truth. Because to be honest, seeing each other every other week, and then bailing on you to the point of not being there during the late hours 10pm-2pm (or at least that's what I call them) is HIGHLY suspicious.

 

If you feel uncomfortable in your there is a reason for it, if your partner is unwilling to resolve it with you what truely is the point of having them in your life at all? Don't second guess the way actions make you feel because that is your mind telling you that something is wrong.

 

We talked things out and I found she has had sex with her friend twice but she insist she did not the night I was here - just made out and fell asleep - she says she really wants to stay with me but she needs to be free and have fun esp since we live in different cities. She didn't really end the convo definitively.

I went to see her Vday weekend, we went out to dinner etc. & ended up going out later that night to the bars with her friends. Her friend that she likes was there but & they danced a little bit but didn't spend a ton of time together. We got back to her house & after a few minutes she said some friends were coming over to hang out for a little bit...

About ten minutes her friend that she likes showed up alone .. which was kinda weird but I didn't what to do/what was going on. The 3 of us sat on the couch and watched TV for about ten minutes & I started to get the impression no one else was coming over... they started getting closer and subtly touching it was really weird & I had all kinds of anxiety. I got up to get a drink (the kitchen is connected to the living room).

In about 10-20 seconds I poured a glass of water, turned around and they were making out. This went on for a little while until they escalated things and wound up fucking right there. The next day we didn't talk about it a lot - she says she thought I understood she was still going to/open to hooking up with him but she still loves me etc etc.

So idk, i've been having mixed feelings about what happened but it's obviously clear what she thinks/wants as far not being exclusive (in bed).

In retrospect A part of was aroused by the whole event, but another part hates that I might be aroused by it. I know I still love her and love being with her but I'm worried I'll regret it if i let this progress ... leaning toward just ending it but hard to do ( I hate the whole situation but lover her/& find myself replaying her having sex with her friend while I am having "me time"

So idk i guess I need to make a definitive decision and/or talk to her again make everything clear from hers & my perspective.

 

is there anyone who is in a relationship like this/been in one... is it a bad idea? did/do you regret it?

 

Seriously dude!!??
If my wife did that to me there would have been a bloody mess to clean up.

I'm thinking this is BS and should be submitted to "Dear Penthouse"

 

So you did nothing while they fucked? That's bullshit in itself, either you became extremely distraught or extremely aroused but either way it had to effect you. If you're disturbed by it then end it, if you're aroused by it then join in. I'm sure you didn't sit there and wonder what was on other channels.

I agree with NoxiousGas because you seem to be describing your senario from a voyeuristic point of view rather than an emotionally disturbed one.

 

okay seriously? these girls suck dude.

instead of just being honest, she cheats then tells you she isn't.

instead of being honest, she "drops hints" by talking about him all the time.

instead of being honest, she "stays with you" for months trying to cause a natural break up.


why are you biologically like this? JUST. BE. HONEST. Even when she got caught (and she wants to break up), she lies.

dafuq. Not all girls are like this, but this this sure ain't man behavior. I hate it. No wonder we don't get along. I don't understand why God blessed such selfish un-honest people with butts and tits.

 

what a ho bag. I would've spilled the drink on her and them, and had the fight right there.


It will take time, but you already know what the right move here is. Peace.

 

After reading this I have came to the conclusion that this whole story is bullshit or the op is a cuckloid or an incredibly insecure and stupid man for being okay with this.