Couple Interested In Threesomes, Any Thoughts?

So, I'll start by stating that I'm a female in a committed heterosexual relationship (have been for 5+ years), and my partner and I are both ready to take a big step and invite someone new into the bedroom. We would both prefer that it be another female, but neither of us has had any experience with threesomes. I've read up on it a bit and saw what others had to say about their experiences, but I need an actual conversation as opposed to just reading blog posts or googling things. For those of you who have experience in this sort of thing: I guess I'm just curious as to how you went about finding a third person and what you have to say about the experience. I'd also like to note that I've never even kissed another female, but I have been curious for a long while now. I'd love to get feedback from other females about what it's like to be with a woman sexually.
Side note: I welcome feedback from everyone, but I don't want to hear about how it might be a "bad idea" at all. I know that some people have experienced problems afterwards. This is something we have talked about for years now and we both want it. We are both at a point in the relationship where we are mature enough to understand the implications that come along with inviting someone new into our bed, so believe me when I say we are READY!!

 

We have been in the swing lifestyle for a few years now and I will tell you right of the bat that finding another woman for a threesome is not an easy task! Everyone is looking for them all the time so you are up against a whole lot of competition. There is a reason they are called a unicorn in the lifestyle. As far as where to look you can try your luck competing on online dating sites or doing it in person at clubs. Either way be prepared for it taking a long time finding her. As far as what it is like to kiss another woman my lady loves it and everything else that comes along with it, but she is bi and is actually attracted to other women. Can't see it being much fun if you are not bi though. We just find it easier to find other couples with bi women ourselves for girl on girl play.

 

We have been doing threesomes for several years and have had nothing but fun.

I was like most guys and wanted 2 women. Then, the woman I was with said sure, but I get 2 guys first. It planted the seed! Then I dated a very exotic looking gorgeous girl and she had been living with a couple and told me she fell in love with them both. She kept hinting that to me to see if I was open to that. What a dumb ass I was for not realizing that!

20 years later!
My wife and I began having threesomes after many years of discussing it. We have had about 25 mfm threesome partners. We try and have just 3 that we are most active with. I wouldn't say we regretted any, but there were several that we never had a desire to have back, but, since they were there, we were going to have some fun.

The only problem with threesomes, is the chance someone falls in love. Either a MFM threesome, the woman falls in love with the other guy (happened here!) or in a FMF, they husband/boyfriend falls for the other woman and leaves you.

YOU MUST MUST MUST have rules set up! Share a google drive word doc. Title it Sexpectations, Rules of Estrangement, whatever. Make several catagories. We did

• Things she wants to try with another man
• Things he wants to try with another man ( not necessarily bisexual stuff, could be straight things that require another cock, like, you sucking both at once, fucking you after the other guy has cum on your stomach, etc!)
• Things off limits (kissing, cumming inside, anal unless well prepared, meeting alone, starting alone, secrets, etc.)
• Things he'd like to see you do more of
• Things she wants to see you do more of
• Her fantasies
• His fantasies

The list will grow and grow. Ours got quite bizarre! We have had a few favorites, one being the best and longest running, Two plus years, 2-4 times per week.
I was so turned on with them two together, I thought it would be hot to send them to a movie premiere alone. They couldn't get tickets. So I told them to go back to his place and make sure you take pictures. We were playing with him for over 6 months by this time. But then I found out that he had been cumming inside her way during these alone visits. It hurt me feelings only because she kept it secret. Had she told me, I could have turned it into something to get me off. I would have been eating her when she came home to taste his scent and see if I could lick her body and find every drop of seamen he left for me. She couldn't shake her attachment to him. He did end up being relocated far far away, but the communication only stopped when I had to stop it. I could still have fun with them together, but they both started having secrets and then it didn't become fun for me.

Just remember, it has to be fun for all 3 or someone isn't going to want to do it again. Including the extra guy. We like to ask what they want to try as well. It reveals their level of kinkiness, experimentation and increases your possibilities to add to your list!

Be honest and open with your husband/wife and all is well. If one thing bothers either of you, work around it, end that portion or see when it would be acceptable to try it again.

Also, it is definitely easier to find single guys than it is to find willing single women. Guys are plentiful and can be found on a few paying websites. Women, I don't think have to seek it out to go to a site, so in our opinion, it's more like the wife needs to befriend her at a bar, networking event, social gathering, etc, and plant the seeds and get her close with the wife first. That's just too much work for us, so we are fine with her just getting ravished by 2 men, I'd be just as happy with multiple men, no limit really! As long as I can film it, take pictures and participate, I'M GOOD!

My wife has a delightful body, wonderful privates and just amazingly great oral skills (which is why I love other men experiencing her!) SO, that being said, having to fuck another woman that sucks in bed or give me a terrible bj, just isn't anything that gets me excited.

And one last thing! ALWAYS ask if they have done this before and what they enjoyed about it or didn't enjoy. Your goal is, unless it's a one-time thing for you, to get them to come back for more!. If they have never done it, they will need to know a few things. 1, there will be another naked man in the room! 2, you will be participating, 3, there may be unintentional bumping or a friendly fire round. (this is rare, but has happened on both ends. They need to be able to handle it without turning on the shower, getting in the fetal position and crying)

If you are bi or bi-curious (the male), be respectful of the other guy if he is not. It's great to imagine you doing what your wife is doing, but if he isn't comfortable with it, don't go there until he is.
We have had a few that were bi and wanted her to do things she wasn't comfortable with, he may ask you to assist, or you can come up with a scenario for another time, that your wife may be comfortable doing what he wants. That would be a strap on, toys in him, or oral all around. If it turns him on to have another couple share a bj, you can always kiss your wife on the cheek as she has his cock fully in her mouth. That will likely excite him as well! He may help you if you fall out or maybe you need to help him if the position entails! If you want to double penetrate her in the same or nearby holes, there may be some man-on-man contact! Doesn't mean that's what's getting either of you off!
One of our straight guys said he was with a couple and the other guy just grabbed his cock. He said it shocked him, and would have been ok if he was prepared for it or was asked. He was excessively large so I can see why anyone would be curious!
If they don't come back, it could be several things, don't let it bother you. You will not invite several back as well. It may have just been a one-time fantasy for them. Maybe they didn't have fun. Maybe they are married and lied to you and feel guilty! Who knows. We haven't invited the ones back that were too nervous to cum, had B.O. or were just not interesting to us on a friendship, communication level. We like to chat first over a few drinks before getting naked!

We are just very open and communicate with our extra stud so we know the boundaries. They know, bi-curious or not, it's all about her. That's our rules.

 

My partner and I have been looking on and off for a year or so to find the right person or people to join us which can be a horrifying search or sweet bliss, we both love the whole sharing and being shared so for us it's easy

 

Once you find the right person/person's, it's a very awesome experience. Wife sharing and MFM's are our favorites. My wife and myself have been active in this lifestyle for about 3 years and are still having fun at it!

 

Well id like to start off with the fact that im not bisexual or lesbian in any way. I have kissed girls, in elementary and middle school, its just what me and my close friends would do. Kind of like practicing for really kissing a boy. I remember my first encounter with a female. It was last year, she was my best friend. (and still is)
But we were pretty drunk, and we were dancing, and one thing led to another. We just explored each other. honestly it was beautiful and hard to describe. I personally think every girl should try it once in their lives. Theres nothing wrong with exploring yourself! While it wasn't anything like having sex with a man, it wasn't too bad. Woman are soft and delicate and tender and you appreciate that about eachother. But I like to be submissive and have that male figure because it brings me security. I would never be with a woman. sexually? maybe. but other than that, I like my man to hold me at night.

While I had a good experience with her, when my boyfriend and I decided to try out a 3 some it was awkward. We really didn't know what to do because we have never done it before. I would just sit there and watch when it wasn't my turn and it was really awkward and sobering to watch him enjoying himself inside of another woman while I was sitting there. I didn't really like that part. But I liked when it was me and her, because I know he was getting turned on watching us and I was having a good time too. It felt sexy, because every mans fantasy is to see a one on one with 2 women. Honestly if we could've kept it like that I would've had a better time. But seeing him have sex with her was weird and alittle unsettling even though I was so positive and sure I was ok just like you are! honestly, you will never know unless you try. I would start off by just you and her so you can get familiar with her and feel alittle uncomfortable sharing her with your man. also you may get turned on and want to watch. But every girl is different. I would try it so you know if that's something your into, and you can say that you at least tried it and made an effort. good luck!

 

I have had a few thousand FFM threesomes over 47 years. The reason is that my wife is bi and her girlfriend lived with us on and off for 30 years. Plus we played with other women. My wife will not have sex with a woman unless I took part. Said it felt like cheating. Although we never had rules, because we were fine with anything, it is smart to have rules like one of the posts above. There is a very real danger of someone falling in love. That happened to our best friends when the husband kept seeing the other girl secretly. We also knew couple where the guys' best friend joined them in a threesome and then started dating his wife. Whenever you bring someone else into your sex life, it is dangerous. We were very lucky. Our long time girlfriend was our friends since our teen years and already a frequent overnight guest in our home before moving it.

Reality is not like fantasy. Things do not go as planned and when emotions and pleasure kick in, we tend to make bad choices. It can be unsettling to see your spouse enjoy sex with someone more than with you or do things that you never let them do to you. Sometimes guys get so excited that they ignore their wives figuring they can have sex with them anything they want but the other girl is only there for the night. Sex releases the hormone Oxytocin. It's job is to emotionally bond the couple together. It lasts for an hour or more after sex which is why it is called the cuddle hormone. To give you an idea of its potency, it is the same hormone that bonds a mother to her child. It can give you feelings the first time or after a few times of having sex with a person.

Have rules and a secret word that when heard means that your partner is uncomfortable with what you are doing. Unfortunately rules are not worth the paper they are written on when sex and arousal take over and our genetic programming kicks in. You need to really be aware of what is going on with all participants as I was. No one ever complained about to little time spent on them. My wife and I usually just double teamed the other girl but sometimes I would just watch or my wife would watch me. We do not get jealous or view sex as the foundation of a marriage. Our marriage is built around a spiritual connection and knowledge that we will always be together and hold each other over all else. We did not believe that we owned the exclusive rights to each other's pleasure. There is still a strong element of ownership of your spouse left in marriage. Plus why marrying using a model that fails 50% of the time. We are married over 44 years and have shared couples and women. It never harmed our marriage or love for each other.

One other thing to look at for is jealousy. It never appears in your fantasy but can clobber you when you see your husband or wife being very intimate and passionate with someone else. Most times the kissing, fondling and showing of feelings is worse than the sex. There are also worries about penis size, body issues, breast size, etc.

As for sex with women. My wife never said she was bi and swears that she did not know it until I was have pity sex with her best friend after a nasty divorce and 8 months no sex. When I was done with her girlfriend, I asked my wife to join in. At first the girls focused on me but I asked them to physically show the love they have for each since they were kids, so they made out. The next time the girls gave each other orgasms and it ramped up each time until it was full sex between the girls. We did not know that our girlfriend had sex with several women in college. My wife said that once she had sex with her girlfriend all she fantasized about was women, not men. It got to the point where my wife prefers sex with women but not for dating or romance. I have had 4 relationships since the age of 15. All four are bisexual. I did not seek them out or even know they were bi until well into the relationships. I am a bisexual magnet as much as my wife is a chick magnet.

Being bi really helps. All of our friends who did not share the other man or woman as a couple, all got divorced. I think most women are bi, but they were taught not to feel that way. Girls I knew rarely had a problem having sex with other girls. Then again I tended to date kinky girls. It is a lot more fun when you and your spouse can please another woman then then both women please you while also pleasing each other. My favorite was one sitting on my penis facing my head and the other sitting on my face towards the other girl. They would kis and make out while one was having intercourse with me and the other oral. There is nothing like it. For a MMF threesome the women can do the same; have intercourse with one guy and oral with the other. Of course she can also have vaginal and anal sex at the same time or simply have her husband hold her while the other guy is performing oral or intercourse with her. Lots of really good things that three can do versus two. Twosomes are pretty boring for us but that is the state we find ourselves in old age. So we engage in fetish sex to spice things up.

The worst that can happen in a threesome is of course one leaving their spouse for the third party or one of you waking up the next day regretting what you did or your spouse fighting with you because you ignored them or were making love rather just having sex. This is one of those things that once done, cannot be undone. I recommend to others that you do it on vacation with someone you will never see again. I lost two girlfriends to a best friend and a good friend because some guys think that just because they had sex with your spouse, they are not his/her boy/girlfriend. They will call your spouse up and try to see them again privately. They will say things like the sex was great but they felt inhibited with your spouse's presence.

If you invite another guy be aware that most guys cannot have sex with another guy present. Real life is not like porn. I only did a MMF once and it was with our girlfriend and her husband. Once I started to kiss and fondle his wife passionately he freaked out and left. We have had guys show up smelly, drunk or stoned, unable to get it hard with me there and pursuing my wife after it was over. My wife is not like the girls you see in porn that get into all sorts of positions and are fine being manhandled. My wife likes to make love with people that she has feelings for, if only just friends. I no longer share my wife with men. I lost a fiancee and girlfriend like that. So just take care. What sounds good in your head may not play out out sa planned when emotions kick in. One wife we knew got bent out of shape when the other girl let her husband do anal sex with her when the wife would not. There is always a risk of an STD or pregnancy. I know that everyone says use a condom but after a few drinks and sex a few times, caution is sometimes thrown into the wind. What was supposed to be just oral sex can quickly turn into intercourse in the heat of the moment.

Our girlfriend got pregnant in a threesome with two guys while she was married and her husband was into sharing his hot wife but the only rule was not to get pregnant, so she opted for an abortion. I had sex with a woman who just left her husband and usually you are very safe with married women but she did not know that her husband was cheating and gave her an STD that she had no symptoms of but I did after sex with her. I gave it to my wife but luckily our girlfriend was unable to spend a few days with us for two weeks so we did not spread it to her. She would have given it to her husband who might have given it to whoever he was having sex with, etc.. Condoms also break and there are a lot of babies born even though condoms were used. So you do have to worry about that too. We were a popular couple because we were attractive, made good money and we are both sterile so pregnancy was never an issue.

Psychologist who tell with sex situations will often advise not to have a threesome with a friend. The odds of falling in love are much greater do to an existing emotional attachment, if even just friendship. It worked for us because our girlfriend and we treated each other as family for 15 years before we turned it sexual. Also beware of the spouse who picks the third person. They may pick someone they are attracted to already and that is never good. As I said, best time is on vacation. Stay away from online and Craig's list. We never once had luck with that. It was mostly guys pretending to be girls and others who just wanted the excitement of the dance before the sex but then disappeared when it was time to talk to each other or meet. We love threesomes and for us it was our normal sex for most of our marriage. I have never had a relationship with a hetero woman for some reason. My wife says that after having sex with me, the girls all turn gay. That is as good a theory as any. I think it is because I was mostly poly and liked girls who never got mad when I looked at another women. My wife would point them out to me when we first met. Now we play a game where we she someone on TV and each say if they would have sex with them or not. We have different tastes in women. I go for the strong dominant looking women while my wife likes the soft looking girls.

 

Hi, I have just started a threesome with a married couple, he is fantastic with sex, and her she seems to love to go down on me after he has give me a lot of pleasure, I'm lucky to be the middle one in a FFM, gosh I never knew sex could be so great,

 

Katrina, I'm in a MFF situation for ~2 years now and it's great. Glad you found out how amazing it can be. Now spread the word to other girls so they will take the leap!

 

hi sorry I answered this on my mother page, I sneak in to see what she write every so often

 

Don't you mean "good fuck"?