Corrupt-A-Wish Game

I wish I could gain control over my life from my family and authority.


you do but the they sue you and the courts find that you are now responsible for ALL of them....you must now care for everyone in your family


....i wish VH lived close enough that we could be friends

 

Granted... But only because animals took over and enslaved the human race.


I wish I was the best singer ever

 

Granted, but you are trampled and killed by fans.

I wish I had the muscles to become a pro wrestler.

 

granted, then you get trampled by a hoard of your female teenage fans and die
*edit* dammit vernadead
I wish that genocide didn't exist

 

Granted, and world peace comes bc of it, but people kill themselves in boredom.

I wish this thread would synchronise correctly

 

I wish that genocide didn't exist

Granted, but then you have to share a house with all of the extra people and do their laundry.

EDIT: I wish this thread would synchronise correctly

Granted, but then it would tear a hole in the fabric of time and nothing would synchronize properly.

I wish I was a princess and lived in a castle.

 

Granted, but you were trapped by a dragon who shaved your head and stuck you in a prison cell.

I wish this thread would synchronise correctly -repeat since skipped -

 

The thread synchronizes correctly but just as it does a hoarde of rabies infested monkeys jacked up on pcp break in, smash your computer and eat you.

(since skipped) I wish I could genetically engineer little pokemon to throw at people

 

Granted, but Lunarverse slaps you upside the head on technicality of animal cruelty.

I wish I could develop an instantly popular RPG

 

Granted but you never get laid again


I wish I lived on an island with only women

 

wish granted...you now live on an island with the cast of the view




I wish I owned my own house with 1000 acres of land

 

granted, but the land is quickly taken from you by the government and a highway is built across it.


I wish aliens would make contact with humans on earth

 

granted..they have..you just dont know it yet but in 4 weeks you will shitting out millions of little alien babies...that anal probe was not actually a probe...you were inseminated


I wish my eyes wouldnt get sore from reading this computer screen

 

they do but then your eyes run away and start a fascist army. they will take over the churches and kill all humans who disobey them.




i wish i had three more wishes.

 

you do but you lose a finger for every wish you make, prompting you to wish for your finger back, only to have it disappear, then you wish for it back and it disappears again, then with your last wish you wish for more wishes so that you can wish for your finger back. You get stuck in this cycle and eventually wish you'd drop dead.



I wish I could breath underwater

 

You can and multiple sexy mermaids approach you to father their children. You do and a race of good looking mer-people eventually take over the world and you become their Zeus.


I wish I could teleport

 

Granted, but you have no choice of where you end up and you find yourself in a cryogenic freezer and your tired from the last teleport and freeze for 1000 years.

I wish I was sexier

 

granted, but the only people who find you sexy are those who are not the gender of your preference


I wish I had the super powers of the Incredible Hulk

 

Granted, but you kill all the ones you love in a fit of rage.
Including:
people in your town
Your Friends
Your Family
Your Lover
Everyone here on HIP forums. (gee thanks)

I smart I was wish

 

granted, you can now write, "I wish I was smart," but your computer blows up before you have time to prove you're not illiterate.


I wish I could travel the world on foot