Confusion and fascination lead to longing...

So I had to write this down ‘somewhere’ today or it would drive me insane!
Today is my wedding anniversary ; many, many years married. I woke up after having a dream about getting fucked by my best friend from high school!

I was 14, watching a gay couples cats while they were away and mowing their lawn. I take my friend the first day; I find him, naked, stroking his cock on their bed; we suck each other off. The next day, we feed the cats, and I suck him off on the edge of the bed. Two dats later we run inside, push the cat out of the way as we sprint into the bedroom. I suck him hard; he flips me over, lubes me up, and I receive my first ever butt fucking! I was ashamed and excited; he was direct and amazing my ass could take all of his cock inside me. We spend the Summer sucking each other off and he spreads my ass whenever I let him.

I haven’t seen him in thirty years. This morning I dream we are both naked; he is on top of me andI ask him to fuck me. His cock goes in deep as I squeeze his ass cheeks and pull him deeper inside me. WTF?!