Common Sayings by Stoners

Oh oh, and how could I forget, when you are smoking with 3 people, and all of a sudden no one has a lighter.
"Who is the lighter ninja?"
Everyone empties their pockets.
Whoever has all three always says, "Sorry man".
Note - It's always the same person who ninjas the lighters.

 

Yo, I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO high.

Thats the one you hear emanating from my circles.

 

I do that all the time. The other day at a coffee shop I ask for "That dank looking muffin in the front row", but the lady knew exactly what muffin I meant.

 

lol omfg this reminds me of me and my friends soooo much. lol we were watchin a video of sperm entering the womb and the egg and shit for sex ed, and it was all like neon looking colors, and me and him both looked at each other at the same time and were like imagine this high lol.
and we have one friend that dont even smoke much i mean he'll take like 3 or 4 hits in a circle then get up and walk away, but always has atleast a 30 bag on him and no less than 5 bluntwraps and will walk up to us like 10 times a night and be like what flavor blunt yall want lol, (this guys also the lighter ninja of our group lol) i dont think ive ever been there when he hasnt asked if anybody had a lighter on em and i got him to give me a ride home once and i was in the backseat of his car and he had like 20 lighters just layin around lol

 

yeah we were smokin a bowl in the hot tub and it has these lights under water. they flash and change colors.

after someone exhaled a big hit it mixed with the steam and we couldnt see each other. it got too thick.

ahhh good times

 

"As your attorney, I advise you to find the mescaline".



I always quote the samoan from fear and loathing.

 

"Yeah, so, uh... what was I saying?"
"Yo. Yo! shit's cherried."
"Light?"
"Tell your story walking" (this one is for when somebody's sitting on the pipe/jay/bong telling a story)
"Wait I think the rotation is messed up"
"Anybody want to throw down on a 5-5-5?"
and of course
"I think that's cashed... might be one more" I think I say that every time i cash a bowl lol.

 

Wha?

Did you saw that?
Hear that?
Man,I am fliping
Hear those voices?
(My friend blazed)The little green man are coming for us!
And the most comon
Why are you moving in slow motion dude?(serious)

 

You must be smoking some weed with like PCP in it or some shit. No green men ever came for me... not while I was just on weed anyway....

 

@Paintballer: referring to food or other non-weed items as "chronic" or "dank": two big thumbs up.

Other shit that if you work into your vocabulary will make you a better person:
You dig what I'm sayin', daddy-o? (after a weekend of reading Malcolm X and Charles Manson biographies. Malcolm and Charlie FTW, btw) Let me pull your coat about a cat, Elijah Mohammed...
Gotta clear that (bong/bowl/bubbler), or you fail at life.
Blow smoke at my cat one more time, and I'll pull your fucking tongue out. (seldom necessary)
You guys hungry? Darkness just whipped up some chronic tofu. (I know these fools balk at the glorius tofu, but if I offer they can't bitch. Bring your own munchies, you mooches!)
Somebody pick a song. Okay, somebody else.
Wanna fuck with that? (referring to a near-cashed bowl or smallish roach) Sure, I'm not a proud man.
No more vape... My brain is heavy.
Shame on a nigga. This was said person to which you are referring that attempted to run game on a nigga? The very same.

 

I've got a hot torch in my pocket!

Shit man, I'm high as fuck

Are you good dude? HELL NO, LETS SMOKE MORE WEED!

We are such stoners, hahahaha!

Dude, it's nine? No fucking way!

 

Lmfao.

 

"(s)he knows!"

"they're stoned too, man, i fucking know it..."