I was cheated on, and even though i was one of them " id never forgive him" people, i did.. and it was a huge mistake. It is so much easier too forgive then it is to forget. We got back to normal within a few months, but i couldnt get it out of my head, and it made me completly paranoid and untrusting. To be fair, my whole personality was changed, and so was our relationship. In the end we called it a day, and it was all because of one stupid mistake. Cheating is rarely ever worth it. If someone was too cheat on me now, i honestly would not forgive it, beacuse ive been there and done that, and cheating is never forgotton or gotton over..
For me personally it completely depends on the situation as to whether or not I'd be able to move on with that person. Forgiveness perhaps could come with time, but I don't know if I would want to go forward in the relationship. Regardless of how long we were together or if we had kids, if there is a lack of love or trust in a relationship that cannot be redeemed, then it is time to move on and heal the hurt and one day find someone new. While I believe that it is quite possible for people to be in monogamous relationships, I don't believe that it is entirely natural. That doesn't mean I think people should cheat. I just think that there is definitely more than one person out there for everyone to fall in love with depending on your given point in life. Sometimes, you are meant to be with one person for the long haul. You never know going into a marriage or a long term relationship what is going to be 10 years down the road. You have to try your best and do what you can to make things work and stay happy and satisfied, but if there is a reason that someone is not happy, I really believe they should have a strong enough relationship to be able to express this to their partner first, work on the problem and if it cannot be fixed, then just end the relationship on good terms and start new. Unfortunately (having had cheated on my ex husband) that isn't how things turn out. So, we can say what our ideal situation would be until we are blue in the face, but that simply isn't reality in most circumstances. But when someone cheats it breaks bonds and trusts and intimacy that sometimes can't be rebuilt. I just always question now if it would be worth it to lose the person I really love, and the answer is always no way. I know I can't stop Jeremy from doing what he is going to do, that is entirely up to him. But I won't stand for someone being disrespectful of me and not taking me into account and putting my entire life in jeopardy. If it is something that I feel we could get past, I would try, if I thought that he would do it again, I'd cut my losses.
It isn't really about sex. When my husband cheated on me...what actually hurt were the lies and that me and my daughters were taking a backseat to his mistress(s). We wouldn't have enough food in the house but he would spend alot of "time at the gym". His kids wouldn't see him for like two days but then he'd "go out with his friends" and wouldn't come home until dawn. He really hurt us and what's worse is, to this day, he still doesn't think he did anything remotely wrong. He thinks it's ok that he's shacking up with the woman he left me for, we aren't even divorced yet, and he has another kid on the way. It's so confusing to the girls and it's horrible for me to see them like that. Cheating is an absolute crime. It's the most indulgent, self-absorbed thing someone could do.
for me it would depend on the situation around their cheating (primarily the why). cheating is a symptom, if the cause is something we can fix and both want the relationship to continue then i'd focus on that with them. and conversely, if the cause wasn't something we could fix or we didn't both want to continue in a relationship we'd either break clean or continue purely as friends. have had it happen a few times with past partners. sometimes we stayed together, sometimes we parted in a friendly manner.
