cheating

I was with a fickle girl who wouldn't choose, like that.
It just means that a person is not mature enough to face a tough decision and make it, and live with it. They want the best of both worlds, and don't seem to be affected by the fact that they hurt both of the people they "love." If they were mature, they'd make the hard choice and pick the one they feel they'd be most satisfied with. But instead they try to hang onto both of them, being uncompassionate to the fact that it's not enough for either of their love interests. I'd rather be dumped than led on by someone who wants the best of all situations just because she's greedy or noncommital.


For the record, I did cheat once on my ex girlfriend, when we were in college. I confessed it to her -- 1200 miles away by telephone -- the same day, because I hated what I had done and wanted forgiveness, and wanted honesty to rule the relationship. It broke us up for about a month or more, and we did get back together -- after she'd gotten "equal time." But to me, even though she NEVER would have found out, I didn't want to live with the lie, and I hadn't really meant to or pursued the chance to cheat. It kinda got dumped in my bed, so to speak. I will never cheat again, though, having learned the hurt it causes both people.

Blue skies,
-Jeffrey

 

i agree that cheating shows a lack of maturity, but not necessarily a lack of compassion, at least not a conscious lack of compassion. in my case, it was fear. i was not emotionally strong and mature enough to let go of the fear, and trust enough to truly love and commit. it was a form of sabotage.


and it does feel awful. it's the worst feeling in the world. in the end, i think it felt worse than the fear.

 

It's just sex. Sort through the religious moralising and you will find that it's just sex. Sometimes you can have awesome love and good sex in a relationship. Which is okay for most. But, I have found that sometimes I can get some awesome sex outside my relationship. Which is what I do from time to time.


It's my secret, although I have no doubt there are suspicions. Some can handle a secret sex life while still attached, others can't.

I won't say sex outside a relationship, cheating you call it is right or wrong. It's just something some of us can manage, and manage well. And something that others can't manage at all.

Mark