Varying only slightly from something I told you in the very first conversation that was between just you and just me I feel compelled to tell you that I love you, for being who you are or perhaps that I love you simply for being and wonder what that I might accomplish to repay you for the simple gesture of your existence Both of us coming to feel somehow safe and secure with the notion that life is tearing our souls to pieces but leaving just enough to propel us through another day or another night or any of the other in-betweens that we resist- teeth clenched, and seething against the grain that life is always on the precipice like legs hanging off the edge of the mattress- the melancholy, the restlessness, the passion we feel for the love we’ve lost both fulfilled and unrequited alike that life is never apologising never thinking in terms of ‘right’ versus ‘wrong’ but tethered to that precipice- remaining faithful to the glory of light, and love, and living and ever so cognisant of the pain that resides at the bottom of a bottle of pills or bittersweet, poison wine or any of the other instruments of self-will in which we might choose to indulge Out of this mutual, tragic void which currently binds us can also blossom a tremendous bond- as strong and bold as two diamonds amid the ruinous ash and at least the potential to grow beyond the muddled fray As my eyes can see sufficiently above these granite markers to finality I am reminded of a very different kind of struggle which was answered as succinctly as my purpose can be stated now- “I am, because we are.” At this tumultuous and defining moment With every jagged punch to the gut which so often seems to find us tempered by the warmest and tenderest expressions of friendship I know that I have you in whom to confide upon whom I can rely with whom I can rejoice and you will always have me for the same and that is how this life will go on
