Cancer, fuck...

It breaks my heart, even though I'm not that close with them.. I can't imagine what it must be like to be a parent and know that your child is going to die soon. They are champions though, the strength they display is rarely seen. And I feel so bad for all the kids with deadly diseases who never get much of a chance at life.

If I was told I had a month to live, I would count myself incredibly lucky to have been given all these years of life, and luckier still that I've been able to experience so much, privileged as I am, being from a western country. I would want to spend my last time with loved ones I think, as in the end, they are all that really matter.

 

Shit. That'd be horrible.

Thoughts are with your family, Jimmy.

 

You know, last weekend I volunteered at a cancer benefit concert. It was kind of ironic, honestly, because I'm fairly sure all the places sponsoring the benefit, the companies giving the big money to put it on, are all places that very likely contribute to the high cancer rate around here. All the different plants had their names up on flags there. It was just an interesting thought I had.

Sorry to hear about your cousin's daughter, Jimmy. I'm not really close to my cousin's kids, but it would still break my heart if one of those babies got cancer.

 

A lot of it has to do with what stage the cancer is in when it is detected.

It's important to dispel the illusion that whether one survives cancer or not depends on whether or not you are a "fighter" or not.

If you've got stage 4, I think the mortality rate is something like 90 percent over two years (?)

Often times doctors are reluctant to tell patients that they are better of just accepting that they're going to die. But people who don't get chemo for stage 4 live longer and suffer less, it's just that they virtually no chance of surviving more than a few years.

 

The statistics are less optimistic when diagnosed at stage 4, but there is a percentage of stage 4 patients who live a long time (years) with the help of treatments who would otherwise die within a matter of weeks or months without it. For some it's worth trying.

Chemo has made a significant contribution to survival with respect to leukemia, which is one of the cancers that afflicts children.

Cancers that affect children seem to be leukemia, brain, and bone cancer. It's a different group of cancers compared with adults.

 

Well, I honestly do think the spirit in a person and their willingness to fight is still a big factor in whether or not someone beats cancer. Your mental state has a lot to do with how you fair through illness. But you are definitely right, the stage at which it's found at probably has a LOT more to do with it than how ready a person is to fight it.

 

The person's willingness to fight is crucial

With my grandfather, he fought on and with good reason.
In 01/02 and before we were in Portugal (he was Portuguese), that's when he was admitted to hospital.
We saw him there and he was in good spirits despite his tough, tough ordeal. As time went on, you could see it was affecting him.
Alert some days but in pain, yet fairly unresponsive other days.

Just before we left, we told him that we'd come in 2 years (that's the norm for us when we go to Portugal).

In obvious pain and discomfort during that time, we went back and he had held on. Just.
Again, he was alert some days and unresponsive other days.

As our time there once again went by, we ultimately had to leave.
The day after we got back, we got a phone call from my grandmother that said my grandfather had passed away and that the cancer had gotten the best of him.

So, he'd held on for a couple more years in obvious pain, just to see my dad (his son), my mum and myself, a few more times.
He always did have great mental fortitude and it showed. He wanted to see us all one last time.

Though, of course, as has been established, the stage in which the cancer is at when it's discovered also contributes, if not more so than mental toughness.

 

Pancreatic is very bad because it spreads so quickly. I just went to a funeral a few months for my second cousins mom, so I guess she was my cousin and not aunt? I never fully understood the relation. Anyway, she was fine one day but felt sick and couldn't eat.. went to the dr and found out she had pancreatic cancer. She even had surgery to try to cut it out but it had already gone to lymph nodes. I think it was about 2 months from the day she found out until she died. I'm glad I got a chance to spend some time with her, hug her and basically say goodbye. And she was positive til the end which I think is really respectable.

 

my cousin's stepson has something called Batten's disease, which is a degenerative disease of sorts. I don't know a lot about it but basically he's slowly losing all his motor function. Kids with Batten's disease don't usually live past 11 or 12. I can't imagine raising a child knowing that he'll pass away in a matter of years. so sad

 

some of us have cancer right now and don't even know it yet.

 

Morbid.

 

On a slightly more optimistic note, some of us probably have had cancer briefly unknowingly but it was outrun by healthy cells and didn't get a chance to do any noticeable damage.

 

Hi youfreeme- I'm sorry to hear about your bf's friend. That is really, really sad. And yeah, it's crazy and kinda scary how stuff like that can come outta no where and you, or one of your loved ones can be fine one day....and then, not.

If I had 30 days to live... I would go to the cabin I enjoy staying at my favorite beach for the duration with my husband and my son as the only people staying WITH me.... during that time I'd relax at the beach and hold my two babies close to me literally at the cabin.... I'd also have my mom and brother and other family members and a few close friends stay at the beach nearby, but not in the same cabin with us.... so we can visit with people...have dinner and stuff with others but still have my privacy.

And I'd stay high.

 

a friend of my moms had a broken hip and found out she had cancer when in the hospital for her hip. the part that sucks about her being given a month to live is that she had a broken hip...so she couldnt do anything physical. i guess it was good in a stupid way because she found out and could at least make amends with everyone/say goodbyes.
if given a month...and not having a broken hip. i would spend a day with each person i care about. maybe i would have a funeral like Micheal J Fox did on boston legal. but the rest of the time would be spent going to concerts and if there was none on a particular day then going to a ball game. buying the best beer, no more cheep shit. i would never want to die young but i envy those people that know they are going to die because they can make final plans. when you dont know you dont get a chance to make those final plans.

 

It's been said, pancreatic cancer hits hard and one can be very messed up with a malfunctioning pancreas.

I have a close friend with a bad stint of all kinds of strange cancers, testicular, cancer in the food and another in the hand. He's in recovery from the recent hand cancer. He broke up with his gf, bought a house and a car and travelled to Newfoundland to meet his biological mother for the first time. He started drawing and painting again. He decided to make a garden in his backyard.

What would I do if it happened to me? I would probably marry my fiancé right away, unless he had objections to it. I would understand it if he did. I think I would still go to work as much as possible and try to live normally and I would fight it. I would make a final testament and leave what little I have to people that I care about. I would spend more time outdoors and listen more to music.

Eventually, if it got really bad, I would write letters to people that I love (in secret) and seal them into enveloppes for the end of days. I would want people to have them and to read them and feel good about my passing.

Whoa.

 

You don't know you're going to die?

 

nope im like a squirrel or a chicken that way

 

Survival rates are improving all the time with better diagnostics. Medication have also vastly changed and improved with more emphasis on quality of life.

Recovery is not one thing and too often diet and mental or emotional state are not given the emphasis that should be a part of treatment and more of a focus.

The will or desire to survive is also a very important part of treatment and recovery. Negativity takes far too much energy that is better focused on healing.

I am a survivor and intend to stay that way.