Can I truly be in love with him- if I'm a lesbian?

So, let me start by saying my sexuality has been confusing for me, my entire life. I've been sexually attracted to females, but deeply craved male attention. Surely this is to do with the fractured relationship with my surrogate father, but returning to the main point. I've only ever had heterosexual relationships. Despite really only being attracted to women sexually. This attraction has grown. It has grown especially as I've found myself getting older. Now I'm 29 and I look at myself differently in the mirror than I did when I was 20- with less appreciating eyes. I've been with several emotionally unavailable men, until Andrew. Andrew. The man who validates, supports, listens, takes accountability. He's smart and driven, and incredibly cute. We live together and talk about forever- and when we do there's a slight ping of pain as I'm not sure of 1. Whether I truly believe I can make him that promise or 2. If that promise will be become a comfortable, but all consuming cage that stifles me and limits my true potential happiness. My interest in women has grown immensely. In fact living with him, he has multiple roommates (including his ex wife). She's beautiful and talented and I admire her in many ways. I find myself confused at times because I'm attracted to her which makes me insecure because if I'm attracted to her? He must be attracted to her! And I don't want him secretly pining for someone else, all the while I'm not-so-secretly (I've told him about my feelings) pining for women all the time. Thinking about sex with women all the time. I think about sex with him too, but it almost feels intentional, where the other thoughts are more compulsive. I'm lost and confused- I truly don't know what to do. Ultimately I would love to be completely blissful honoring my promises to him and living a life with a loving, supportive partner. I'm just hoping that I won't have to live my life always wondering ,"what- if".

 

Look into non monogamy, polyamory, open marriage, and discuss this with him? There's no reason you can't have both a man and a woman in your life? Maybe you're bisexual? It doesn't have to be equal 50/50 interest in both genders!