Can’t maintain an erection during intercourse

I’ve been with this girl for a couple of months now and I just can’t seem to maintain an erection during intercourse with her even with viagra! I have no problems getting an erection with her when we’re doing other stuff (even just holding her hand when we’re walking around does it!) but as soon as we start having penetrative sex I seem to loose it after a few seconds. We usually stop for a bit, get it back up and try again but then it just goes straight away. A very frustrating cycle!

Ive only been able to have penetrative sex with her twice so far, once with viagra and once without although that time I came almost instantly. I’ve been able to satisfy her in other ways and she says she’s fine with it but I’m worried it’s eventually going to drive her away.

The issue for me is that it just never feels like I’m inside her and I’m not getting the same sensations/grip I am from her hand or mouth. Since viagra isn’t helping (and probably isn’t necessary as I have no problem getting an erection in the first place) I was wondering if there is anything we could try such as lubes or cock rings?

 

Most guys I've been with have difficulty maintaining an erection after ejaculation. Not sure if Viagra would help or not, but being able to maintain would go a long way (no pun intended) to allowing me to have multiple orgasms. Never been with a guy wearing a ring on his cock, so maybe that's the answer.

 

Your loss of erection is likely a product of performance anxiety. The more you think about how she will be disappointed if you lose your erection, and about how important it is for you to maintain it, the more likely you are to lose it. You're putting too much pressure on yourself, self-sabotaging.

Of course her vagina doesn't grip you like her hand or mouth do. It's a different body part with different properties. When it comes to the physical match between your genitals, you may have a small (you) large (her) mismatch down there, or she may produce generous amounts of natural internal lubrication, or there are several other possibilities. If you aren't getting much sensation from vaginal penetrative intercourse now, then you definitely don't need to add lube, or neither of you will feel anything.

My recommendation is that you not perform coitus until after you have satisfied her in other ways, and that you seek and expect your own orgasm/ejaculation in other ways.

Your situation isn't really a problem unless you are trying to produce a child together.. There is no need for you to ejaculate in her vagina otherwise. I had a very satisfying relationship with a man who could never get an erection at all. When I wanted vaginal penetrative sensation and stimulation, we used a dildo I appreciated that he often initiated it.

I understand your frustration, but couples that last have good communication and find the most harmonious way they can enjoy each other's company with what they have.

 

That’s really good advice, thank you!
She has been really cool and supportive over the whole thing and we do communicate really well when we’re together which is definitely helping me get out of my head. Hopefully it’s just a matter of time.

 

I have found that using a ring, strap, or other device helps me maintain an erection. Don't get it too tight and be sure it will come off when you finish.

 

Are there any you could recommend?

 

Not really. I was afraid of metal ones and other hard materials. There are some leather ones that are adjustable and work well. Or you can just use a small Velcro strip, guaranteed adjustable and won't get stuck in place.

 

You might be possible you are lacking some vitamins. Are you overweight? Do you exercise? Do you masterbate a lot?

Have you went to the doctor and possibly had some blood work done to see if anything is low?

If you are lifting weights try some amino acids bro.

 

It's pretty much exactly the same with my wife and I. I never had the problem with my ex wife though. I sometimes have a hard time getting it up for her even though she might be sucking or licking my cock and balls. When i finally do i cum pretty much instantly. She's so patient with me but I just know she is depraved. I sometimes use a dildo on her but usually I just nut and go to sleep. She is extremely sexy and horny as hell and just deserves better.

 

I had the same problem 5 years ago when I met my 2nd wife.
I could get a hard on very easily, but it wouldn't stay hard. But I would still wake up with a morning woody like a steel rod.
So I knew it wasn't a physical problem.
I no longer have that issue and here is what I did.
First thing was to openly talk about it with her. She was supportive and that was the biggest help really. I had not had sex for several years before her, as my previous marriage was sexless for a very long time. So... I masturbated a lot obviously. That was a double whammy as that carries it's own issues.
She also introduced mutual masturbation...which was a huge turn on also. My first wife did nothing like that. It was a thrill to be openly masturbating with another person right there and enjoying you doing it! That helped. It took the pressure off of just relying on intercourse.
Long story short - it took probably 6 months to get totally over it. Every once in a while it still happens but I know it is ok...she loves me and is not upset by it.

Cheers and good luck.

 

Another month has past I’m still having mixed results. We have managed to have amazing sex a couple of times now (both with and without viagra) so hopefully it’s just a matter of time but more often than not it’s still quite a frustrating experience.

When she’s on top I never seem to have the problem, if anything I can’t last long enough. The real problem is when we try any other positions particularly the missionary, I either lose my erection instantly, lose it after about a minute of thrusting or I just cum instantly. It also seems to be when I move around, while we’re doing foreplay I’m usually on my back or side but then when I get up to move on top of her there’s a few seconds of awkwardness getting comfortable and by the time I get inside her it’s gone again.

 

I would stick with her on top,, with this you get two free hands to what ever you want with as long as she is happy with that stick with it, girl on top is called cowgirl. try reversed cowgirl and try taking her from behind either kneeling as well on the bed or from behind standing after a bath together slips in nice that way.

 

When it comes to cock ring I have an ice ring you wear it 24/7, keeps you ready to go, you should find it on allknightlong.com when you measure for one dont have a full erection going just a good semi is best.

 

Get her off with a vibrator or use your hands. When you lose your erection just pull out and jack off on her chest. I love fingering my wife while jacking off. My wife loves seeing me jacking.