yea im blowed out(on coke for those of you who dont know what that is). its pretty sick. but i started this thread to tell every one whats up with me right now. and thats that im fuckin depressed and weed and other drugs are making it worse and my life just suckkkkks right now. and when ive been smoking pot ive been getting psycotic. i for real get schitzo i start thinking crazy scary shit and freak out i cant even be by myself when im high because i get sketched out and fucking crazy. so i think im quitting pot and i think im quitting all drugs and going to treatment. for all of those who are smoking pot and/or doing other drugs i really hope you all keep it mellow and only do it occasionally. all my friends now basically dont hang out unless theyre drinking/smoking/doing some drug. and it sucks i remeber before we did all this shit and we had way more fun just fucking around and chillin. its gay as fuck and im goin to rehab and them im fuckin going to meet some new friends who arent fuck ups. its all good though i know ill get my shit straight pretty quick here. wish me luck.
good luck man, i hope you can get the help you need. Im not so sure you need to go to rehab though. Ive been there (not my choice) and they dont help you even if you wanna get sober. The real thing that will help you imo is AA meetings (thats what they have you do in rehab anyways) plus they are free unlike rehab . Start going to meetings and talk to some guys and find a sponsor. All the guys there are real friendly and will help you out.
I know exactly how you feel. I am going through the shitties time of my life right now too. Weed isnt helping, it actually made thing worse as it has triggered the onset of my social anxiety disorder. Yesterday, I took a 1 day break from weed to see if it would help. I went to a friend's birthday party and just as I joined the table everybody was sitting at I literally started shivering, blushing and having all sorts of panic attacks. EVeryone noticed something was wrong with me which made me even more anxious so I had to leave after 20 mins. All my firends must know think I am loosing it. I am already on medications that and a 2 week weed break should help at least a little, I hope....
" I went to a friend's birthday party and just as I joined the table everybody was sitting at I literally started shivering, blushing and having all sorts of panic attacks. EVeryone noticed something was wrong with me which made me even more anxious so I had to leave after 20 mins." ^ The same type of thing used to happen to me. Something that will really help you/ has really helped me is BREATHING exercises. If you can focus your breath and fully relax your self, this type of stuff can not possibly occur. All these things (shivering, blushing) are just ingrained responses to danger/trouble/fear. What you need to do, in order to dispel these symptoms in times of social contact or whatever is just BREATHE. Trust me man- i used to have the same problem and it REALLY got to my head and i basically just wouldn't want to do any social things (parties etc.) because they just led to heightened tension and stress. What you need to do is just sit back, meditate, realize that life is a blessing and just breathe. Breathe in to a count of 7 seconds and out to a count of 11 seconds- if you're doing it right you'll feel your eyes start to shed tears- and as we know a lot of our stress is stored in our tear ducts. Do this before you go to a social place, and you should be better. I really wish you luck because i do know what this is like, and i still do face these type of problems now and again.
thx for the advice man, really. I'll try this breathing technique next time I go to university. I am on some anti depressants right now (SSRI) which useually tend to intensify the panic attacks on the first week since the body is adjusting to it. So maybe this is the reason I reacted so bad yesterday. I have 2-3 weeks to go before the drug starts having an effects. I hope that and the breathing techniques will help...
man that really sucks, my nephew used to go through the exact same thing but he's gotten so much better now, he has a girlfriend and his own place to live. i even know a few friends who's going through the same thing, it's pretty sad and unfortunate. but hopefully you'll stick it through and get better from it. peace.
i know exactly where you're comin from. before me and my friends ever started doing drugs we hung out and just had a good time like playing hide and seek and stupid shit like that.. then all my friends started doing drugs and now they'll only call me up if they wanna smoke a bowl whatever. the times when we could just chill out without drugs are over.. and it is really fucked up. i never thought my friends would end up like that. but good luck getting the help ya need!
I have a friend that started blowing lines just recently, dropped out of school, and is now making his living stocking shelves at a supermarket. It's nasty shit, and I'm sorry to hear it's gotten out of control. I'm psyced to hear you're going to seek treatment on your own and you need to know that you are not alone. Good luck with dropping it and let us know how things are going.
^your friend sounds like most of my friends that i had since grade school. they got into drugs and pills real bad, and probably more than half of my friends are dropped out of college and working regular joe jobs.
everything in this thread sounds like its doing the commercials on tv justice. good luck tho bro with the treatment.
God, I love cocaine. That's why I stay the fuck away from it, though. I also had similar experiences with drugs triggering/intensifying underlying mental illness. I had bad drug experiences early on that contributed greatly to the anxiety I have daily. If your feeling anxiety, staying away from drugs is a really good idea, IMO. When my head gets cluttered with thoughts of anxiety and depression, taking a break and clearing my brain is the only way to feel better. GOOD LUCK!
Best of luck man. To everyone else... quit being such pussies about how your friends are all dropouts and drug addicts. They're still your friends until they steal something from you for crack money. Besides, someone has to stock shelves, and if they're happy doing it for drug money then more power to them. If you're really upset about it get a good enough job to send them to rehab... or just be thankful that YOU have enough self-control to live your life for you and not some chemical. Or just develope a respectable drug habit of your own. It's all good.
gottssunfire, youre wrong for saying having a drug problem is fine.. when has it ever worked long term for any one EVER? nope its never happened... maybe for pot but if youre talkin coke meth crack heroin then no. im not addicted to coke btw.. im going to treatment just becausae i need to get away from all the durgs ive been partying on(excatsy, coke, shrooms, pot, and lots of alcohol) because if you just look at me you can tell i do drugs and thats sad to me. i need to stop before it permantly fucks me up. and when i come down from whatver im on i get really really deppressed. its just that i love drugs so much haha. i just love being on them, the come up, the peak, its jsut so great. but clrealy not worth it so i need to get away for awhile.
Jimi, im going through similar shit with weed. I cant be myself because the weed makes me go crazy inside my brain, i get all sketched out and way to fucked up to even process words in my head, its awful. But, whats even worse is that i love alcohol and i have HepC, but i still drink anyways. You only live once.
Well Jimi it's truely sad to hear that your going through what I have been struggling to get out of along time now. I used to spend around $500/week on coke and around $400/month on exactsy. I now only smoke weed and drink on occasion. When I first started using coke, im not gonna lie, I loved it. I bought more everyday and thats when everything went downhill. I was depressed, suicidal and wanted to be a hermit crab, I never wanted to go out and if I did go out I was so obsessed with how I was going to get my next bag I would steal anything just so I could get my fix. I wouldnt let myself go to my parents weekend parties at my house anymore because when people left their purses in my parents room I would go through and take as much money as I could. I know this sounds bad, and thats because it is. My past is my past and I regret almost every second of it. Jimi this message is for you bro: Get Help Immeditaly Ive been in rehab and many outpatient care facilities and to really get anywhere you'll probably need to involve your family in this, it is a serious issue(trust me, it'll be as hard as you can imagine but dont back down) Now I'm not the one to say when you go to rehab or w/e your going to do, to quit "drugs" forever. The first thing they'll say is you can't get better without a relapse. This is extremely true. I went to rehab and got off the drugs, but soon later I relapsed and started smoking my crack pipe again. This was the point where I "woke up" and saw what my life had turned into. I had been arrested, was thinking about dropping out, was about to get kicked out and I had nothing going for me, no gf's, i lost all my best friends cuz I ripped everyone off and I finally realized at this point that I gotta start making something for myself. I haven't touched coke in around 1 year now and I feel like im my "good old" self again. Im not really depressed (though im on zoloft now), i just graduated high school, I got a gf now, all my friends forgave me and now I can just live the life ive been wanting to have for so long. Wow im rambling but Jimi this is the point of your life where you must decide something very important for yourself. Are you going to do this for yourself or others? If you want to get away from all the bullshit, DO IT RIGHT AWAY. Stop everything and make sure there is no way you can get back into the bullshit. New freinds may be necessary for your rehabilition, which im not gonna lie is probably the hardest thing to do, so my best bet is really have a heart to heart with your close friends. If you tell them whats going on, they wont temp you, and I'm probably the least "gay" person here, so dont say im some fag cuz I share my feelings, if their your true freinds they will understand and wont turn you away. Best of luck Jimi P.M. me if you need any support during this time bro.
thanks alot jake, seriously. to be honest i dont have any close friends, i have a bunch of kids i hang out with and get fucked up with. i dont feel close to any of them except maybe 2-3. id say my brothers are the only people im really close to. anyway, ill probably pm you soon and talk if you dont mind, thanks again.
