Bipolar disorder is NOT cool

My psych diagnosed me for having a variant of bipolar disorder (*as he said it), he also wanted me to take lithium and stuff.. i'm happy my parents refused to put my on heavy stuff like that. In anyway, i have those vague days that everythings seems to pass by without having any grip on reality, but i learn to life with it without medication.
I sometimes run away from lessons at school because i need to be alone and somehow get out of the vagueness and melancholie (if that's the right word).
the only way to stabilize my ups and downs are by taking everything slow and isolating myself alot, give my brain some time to rationalize everything.
I sometimes really feel like i'm balancing on the edge of madness with only one way to escape it..
And every night is a drag to fall in sleep, sometimes if i can't get to sleep early i get paranoid and later in the night i get mild hallucionations, hearing voices that shouldn't be there, seeing moving thing on the edges of my sight, and this then keeps me awake for the rest of the night till early in the morning, and then my paranoia drops again and i can finally get to sleep :/. And if it is school the next day i'm just screwed.. , atm i'm doing some sort of time-out project, they don't want me to come to school for 6 weeks because of bad behaviour (sleeping in lessons, skipping lessons, running out of lessons) .. and all this in my last year..2 months before my final exams, what a screwover. but i refuse to do medication, i need to accept how i am, only that way i can better myself and learn to live with myself.
I don't want to do meds just so that i can function better in this society, i want to be myself, and if people can't accept that, so be it..

Well, If people want attention, pretending that they have all kind of weird stuff, just let them be, let them have the attention they want, i mean, who cares? In the end they are just fools that fooled themselves.