Best sex orientated trick to play on partner?

Now and again if the wife is out or away i leave a couple of condoms used on bedroom floor or in toilet unflushed but filled with lots of shampoo or anything that looks similar to cum. Lol.

 

I once told my wife that just for fun I'd mail her a cumfilled condom, She said that would be exciting and I'll mail you one too. She is my best friend.

 

I got my wife good once. Evening time and we both get in bed. I just got back from my 4 weeks of work out of state. We play and are getting all horny. I stop her suddenly and said WTF as I'm looking at my pubic area. She's like, what's wrong??? I said I think I have crabs!! She looks down and sure enough, her passion and cravings turned to instant offense and the usual questions, so who were you with?? Just couldn't wait until you got home could you??. I didn't have it in my heart to go any longer and started laughing. She's asking what's so funny. So I told her... I ended up bringing a little pinch of coffee grounds in with me and sprinkled them in my pubic area to look like crabs. Worked like a charm!! In the end I just had to fuck her longer to make up for it. But sure is funny thinking back and seeing that look on her face lol