Bad Pick-up Lines

That old favourite…

"Get your coat – you’ve pulled!"

< Peace + Love ~ Save the Planet >

 

there was this girl sitting on a table looking at time and looked interested so i walked towards her and while i was trying to look serious, i told her... "will u just stop fucking me in ur mind cuz we can naked and do it rite now if u want" ..oh man the look in her face! hilarious!
it was that one time-only thing tho ok.. i respect women.. serisouly.

 

^^ that's actually funny.

you know the movie wedding crashers? well, i find that "she just eye-fucked the shit out of me" comment so hilarious, that i may just have to use it... and hope the person actually saw the movie, or i'm gonna be diggin myself out of a deep hole!!

 

I have never used any pick up lines but I have heard a few here and there. Bing in the Navy you hear all kinds of shit. One guy told a young lady " that dress would look good at the end of my bed". One guy I knew had the words " Your Name" tattoed on his dick, so what he would do is go up to a girl and say " I bet you a fuck I have "Your Name" tattoed on my dick" well needless to say he would always win. But some that I heard was just nasty as hell and I won't even type them here.

 

this one is back from 1979. it was the one and only time i ever went into a discotheque. i was sitting at a table, and this guy came over to this gal at the table next to me, and he screamed out... "I BET YOUR ASSHOLE SMELLS LIKE A ROSE AND YOUR SHIT DO TAESTE LIKE STRAWBERRIES!" i'm quite sure both that poor woman and i, had the same dumb founded shit look on both our faces! dickhead look so proud of himself, like he just said the most brilliant thing of all time. i knew then and there that neanderthals still walk the earth!

 

here's another one one heard in the South " You sure do got pretty gums"

 

"I'm Fred Flinstone and I'll make your bedrock"

 

i love this one! "the name is bond, james bond." this is from a guy i knew from grammer school through high school, and yes, that was his real name! james patrick bond; we just called him jimmy. all the girls who knew him though it was funny. the girls who did not know him, always told him to fuck off.

 

love it :cheers2: