Aversion to "tranny chasers"?

Hello

I know there is no need for you. And maybe even no need for your partner

My opinions are brought about by how I've always seen myself, (female) the clinical meanings of Transsexual, and observing the "tranny" phenomena. The clinical meaning of transsexualism means "having a desire to be the opposite gender to the one which was assigned at birth". Seeing as I've never seen myself as anything other than female, the opposite gender to me has always been male, not female. I do not "have a desire" to be female, that is what i am, and what i was born as. At least in mind and soul. I do wish I'd been born with a normal female body, as living as a female in a male body is literally hell, and i wouldnt wish it upon anyone.

Me and others like me, believe we were always the one gender. And are simply changing our bodies to fall into line with what our real genders have always been. In other words, the male body i was born with, is a birth defect. My brain is female, but somewhere along the line in the womb, something happened to give me a wretched male body, and so I'm stuck in this hell/limbo. The clinical definition of "transsexualism" does not class it as a birth defect. In fact it is classed as a mental disorder. I've never classed myself as a trans-anything, simply a girl who had the terrible misfortune to be born inside a male body. And finding out about the literal meaning of transsexual, just makes me distance myself away from that still further. I do wish, and have always wished I'd been born a normal, biological girl. But I've never "wished" to be female. Because I already am female, and indeed always have been. As that is what I've always felt i am inside.

"Trannys" on the other hand, appear to be men who just enjoy doing themselves up like women. A more extreme version of transvestitsm if you like. They are obviously NOT suffering from what me, and others like me are suffering from. They enjoy their male sexual organs, which is something that just baffles someone like me. A true female wouldnt want male bits stuck to her. And if she did have them, she'd want to get rid of them. And keep them hidden until they were got rid of, even if that took forever. For me, the idea of anyone seeing me naked, or partaking in any kind of physical relationship while i still have the horrible wrong bits stuck to me, seems horrific. It's something that wouldnt feel in any way natural for me to be doing, so i never will. Since my first sexual fantasies in early puberty, I've always pictured myself with a man, and with the female body i know always should have had. I cannot even contemplate having any kind of physical contact with male genitals, because it feels unnatural to me. Its quite ironic, that most people would class me the same as these "trannys", when i feel i have nothing in common with them at all. To me, if you're happy keeping your male genitals, then you can't be female. Because my body and genitals have always repulsed me. And i think anyone genuninely trapped in the wrong body, they feel the same way. These people are not trapped in the wrong body, and in my opinion, not female either. They are pretending to be women, and nothing more than that.

I certainly do not understand people like that. But i have no anger towards them, even though their prescence makes it even harder than it was before, to get people to take someone like me seriously. And see, that for anyone really trapped in the wrong body, it's a horrible, and debilitating thing to have to live with. I see "trannys" as another aspect of sexuality. And being in the wrong body IS NOT a sexuality. Lots of people think it is, but it's not. It's purely about gender, nothing to do with sex, or sexuality. Mentally, I'm sure i think no differently that any female born with the right bits would. It's just that i have the incredible handicap of having a male body, instead of the female one i always should have had. There has only been a tiny amount of scientific research done into the causes of this condition. But the research that has been carried out highlights a strong likelyhood of this being something innate, and something a person is born with. Brain structure/genetics, or a combination of the two. Which wouldn't surprise me, seeing as I've always seen myself as female. Despite everyone else treating me as the opposite. I am literally a female born with a male body. I do not need any scientific evidence to prove what i already know. But for ill educated people who still believe people like me choose to be this way, it'll be a valuble asset in educating these people. You'd have to be insane to choose this life, it's horrible, and i wouldn't wish it on anyone.

I have nothing in common with "trannys", and i certainly don't understand them either. But i have no problem with them. As long as you're not hurting anyone else by your actions, you should be able to live your life how you want. I'm just sick of these people being treated the same as people like me. They are not female, and nor do they probably even see themselves as that. And if they do, they're only kidding themselves.

 

Hey

Some of your feelings about your soul, mind and body are commun for some people (fortunatelly not many) and I have read/heard about it many times. I agree with many of your views. I live in a country where sexual identity freedom is widely accepted and understood. In fact, same sex marriage is daily routine and sexual reassigment surgery is paid by the Goverment.

Those social achivements have been gotten by other trannys and similar social networks.

Trannys are difficult to categorize into only one "tag". There are trannys that enjoy their male bits and have sex with men only. Others prefer women only (or both). Other just want to have sex with other trannys. Others will go every way.

Other trannys hate their male bits but have no choice for the moment and rather "work" to save money for surgery. Other suffer in silence. Other enjoy sexuality out loud. So generalizations are usually very tricky.

Even thought it might seem hard to believe, some trannys out there hate their male bits as much as you do, they just dont have the courage (or money) to face surgery. As someone mentioned before, as life has given them lemons, they make lemonade.

It is crystal clear you dont have a choice to make lemonade. But, allow me, proffessional stuff working on sexual identity usually have a very close idea of your feelings and they can differentiate among people and situations. You are not a tranny, and anyone can see that easily.

I just wished our society to be better prepared to help everyone persue happines

 

Hi

Well, in my country there is still a lot of intolerance, and ignorance towards people like me. Same sex marriage is not legal here either. Though i stress again, gender issues and sexuality issues are seperate, and shouldn't be treated as being linked, when they are entirely seperate things.

I wouldn't class the latter as trannys though. If you've always seen yourself as female, and hate your body and genitals, (And indeed others mispercetion of your gender) and want surgery to correct that, then you are not a tranny. If you cannot afford surgery, then that is obviously not the person's fault. The ones that suffer in silence are not trannys either. To me, a tranny is someone who clearly enjoys their male anatomy, but makes themselves look female for sexual kicks. Like i said, just an extreme form of transvestitsm. Unfortuntely, to lots of the general public, they believe people who feel they are actually female, trapped in a male body that feels unnatural to them, are the same as these trannys. They make no distinction between the two. I once heard someone saying "I always thought they hated their bodies, so why would they want to flaunt them, and show them off to everybody." Lots of people seem to have this mindset. They make no distinction between people like that, and people like me who are deeply distressed at having to live in a body that feels completely alien to us. Unfortunately, most people just like to put everyone that's different to themselves into one big box of "weird". Which is why they see someone who is trapped in the wrong body as no different to a tranny. It's bad enough me having to see my body, I'd be mortified if anyone else saw it, and I'd rather die than allow anyone else to see it in it's current state.

Yes, happiness is something that i feel is beyond me. It kills me that i can't freely enter into a relationship, like normal girls. Even simple things like having a period, sure it'd probably be painful, and feel a bit uncomfortable, but at least it would feel natural to me. It feels unnatural to me that I've never had one. I don't think I'll ever experience love, which is a big cross i have to bear, but one which i accepted a long time ago. I know most straight men wouldn't be seen dead with someone like me, and in a way i can understand that. Not that it's any less painful a fact for me to accept. I am not a tranny, and i am glad you can see that. Sadly, the vast majority of people would class me as that, which is why i generally don't tell people about my situation.

The society we live in is not a nice place for someone like me to live in. I wish i had been born normal, but i wasn't, and i have to live with the fallout from that. As bad as my life is, i refuse to live a lie. As i know I'd be even more unhappy if i was doing that. I may be unhappy now, but at least it's on my own terms, rather than other people's. Unlike a lot of people in my situation, i decided very early on that i wouldn't live a lie, and as a consequence, my life has been put on hold since my early teens. I cannot live my life as a female with male bits, and nor do i want to. I just wish society would make it easier for me just to live a normal day to day existence, without constantly worrying about other's perception of my gender. Which is really all ive ever wanted.

 

This basically describes my own personal aversion to "tranny chasers".

There's nothing worse than finding out someone likes you "because" you aren't a genetic girl instead of just despite the fact. Being trans is the bane of my existence and not something I really like being reminded of, let alone having someone prefer that I have such a problem.

 

Now, I'll comment this and PLEASE TRY TO IGNORE MY USERNAME! I only recently realized how unimaginably ignorant it is, and tried to change it...didn't managed to do so.

Nownow! Let's get into this. First of all, I wan't to say this: men always do some sort of fetish out of their loved one when having sex. It's pretty basic thing in the world of sex, there's nothing wrong in that. Also, many men do both fetishizing and lovemaking, depending on the situation and mood.
However it seems that there are men who don't know that what happens in bedroom stays there. Or that you could not only have sex, but also make love! These "tranny chasers" treat their transsexual girlfriends as fetish in EVERY FUCKING MINUTE, making their lives miserable.
Often these scum-of-Earth-tranny chasers are mixed with ordinary trans-orientated men, who are mostly attracted only to TGs, but who have the miraculous capability of loving and caring. The results may be pretty devastating, leaving many transsexuals and trans-orientated guys apart from each other, because of fear and mistrust.

I think I'll create new account because of this stinky username I chose. At the time I did not know how dehumanizing term it was, as I don't speak english as my mother tongue...my apologies for that.

 

One of my nicest online friends I made a few years ago was transgendered. I absolutely loved reading her blog, as it was interesting to read about her daily struggles with work, her family, and her boyfriend. If anything, she was one of the bravest and strongwilled people I ever got to know.

I may have had quite the infatuation with her, being Bi it was so natural. She was aware, but was very appreciative I never once treated her as an object of fetish, but as a person I was simply attracted to. There were nights she would get silly drunk and we'd talk for hours, and she often tried to do the mutual getting-off routine, but as she was drunk I never took advantage of it. It was that action I think that really made us good friends. Heck, her real life best friend learned about it and even told me she was happy that we met each other, as she often got treated as nothing but a sex object by guys online.

In the end, I learned there can be a line between the obsession/fetish and the friendship. Someone commented on it here a bit, and to further illustrate it imagine you have a latex, leather, or whatever fetish. You love that stuff, and when it's on a person it drives you double wild. It would be weird to them that when getting it on all you did was go all over their leather/latex/etc and ignore them as the person. They will see "oh well he's just got this fetish and doesn't care for me!". Unless you're paying by the hour, don't expect them to feel good and keep contacting you. Same goes for a transgendered person. My friend loves that analogy, hopefully she still uses it to explain to others how to treat her.

Sigh.

She went offline over a year ago, due to having to move and being very tight on finances. I miss her dearly as she was always open to me about her life, I also was to her. Now I'm even more depressed than when I started this thread ><

 

First of all I do understand that "tranny" is a derogatory term and I apologize for the usage.

I hate that this aversion to us is so huge. its like being gay and another gay man saying " no i don't want to date you because you're attracted to gay men"

I am extremely attracted to pre-op transexual women and I have always tried to have a relationship with beautiful transgender woman, but as soon as it comes out that I am attracted to her because she is a TS the door slams.

ugh "tranny chasers" need love too

 

I used to get creeped out by tranny chasers, but now I wish I'd meet more of them. I'd rather talk to someone who admires my androgyny/gender bending/crossdressing than someone who doesn't.

 

haha same here...to an extent.

 

Well, I guess this is why most actual female transsexuals don't want anything to do with tranny chasers. They don't see themselves as gender benders, or cross-dressers, but actually as women born in the wrong body. Tranny chasers don't view them as real women, and are not attracted to them as women, which is why many transsexuals have an aversion to them and want nothing to do with them.

Also, transsexualism is a recognised medical condition, whereas "gender bending" behaviours are not. Crossdressers and autogynephiles (men who get sexual gratification from altering their bodies to appear female, but do not actually see themselves as females) are really the only types of people who would happily go with a tranny chaser. Most actual transsexuals wouldn't entertain them.

 

Good point. Some of them are just plain disgusting.

 

sounds like fun to me.good luck..

 

i think the term "chaser" might be similar to the term "player" in this instance. i don't think anyone wants to feel like they are being used. if you are going after t-girls and "hitting and quitting" then i would not be surprised for you to acquire the term "chaser." don't be discouraged by a few people's derogatory terms though if you are truly an admirer (like myself) and want to pursue a serious relationship.

i DO believe however if you are pursuing people in the transgender community you should consider them for who they are NOW, not who they USED to be. if for instance they are living as a female, they obviously want to be treated, talked to, and respected as a female.

hope i could help

 

I have over 75k hits on my tranny pic site.. More popular there than here. go figure..

 

I joined this forum because I found this thread during a google search. I couldn't agree more with invisible_soul. She eloquently explained everything. Tranny chasers are sleazy, disgusting, ineffective men who claim to be straight when all they want is dick. There could NEVER be a relationship with a tranny chaser because what moves him is paraphilia, fetish. The author of Alice in Genderland is a psychiatrist and explains why all tranny chasers are ineffective, unsuccesful, very unattractive men. They are birds with clipped wings and have gender issues themselves but they want to express their gender issues vicariously through another transsexual.

A tranny chaser is the worst imaginable guy someone who really feels a woman can date. The funny thing is that they claim to be straight and they lie a lot about their sexuality. They say they're top and then they want to get anally penetrated. I would prefer to be alone for the rest of my life and not with a tranny chaser.

 

What is a fetish anyway? Isn't it just an uncommon or taboo sexual attraction? Either way, it's the same basic thing as the sexual attraction that initiates most relationships. It's the physical interest. Relationships and love are different things, but I don't see how they're supposed to be mutually exclusive with fetishes. Some so-called tranny chasers might be undesirable for one reason or another, but does that really apply to them all?

I'm a gayish guy (probably leaning a bit bi, but still more gay--no label is really good enough lol) and the idea of being with an FTM really excites me. Currently dating one and hoping make it a relationship with him soon.

 

I think the issue here really, is tranny chasers are attracted by an aspect of these people that they themselves find undesireable and repulsive. Transsexualism is a medical condition, so in actual fact, being attracted to someone specifically because they are transsexual is just like being attracted to someone specifically for having a physical deformity or disability. And I don't think any disabled person would be happy to know that someone finds their disability itself attractive and sees it as a good thing that they are disabled. It's one thing to be attracted to someone in spite of their disability, it's quite another to be attracted specifically because of their disability. So no, it's not really the same as the sexual attraction that initiates most relationships at all.

Many transsexuals see their bodies as being deformed, so it shouldn't be too surprising that having people actually being attracted to that unwanted deformity would make them feel very uncomfortable.

 

I think it just depends on how you approach them. I like to look at forums and pictures because Shemales are hard to meet in real life. So in a sense it is a fetish because I know I most likely won't meet one, so they are a bit of an exotic person I fantasize about. I would never stalk a TS or go over board to meet one. Just how some guys like blondes or brunettes, I am attracted to these women. I just think they are beautiful as well as courageous for living how they want to live!:daisy: