Atrocious speelling and gramer

Discussion in 'Writers Forum' started by Fixes_big_yellow_things, Aug 8, 2018.

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  1. storch

    storch banned

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    God, it's loozerer!! You are the loozerest.
     
    storch, Aug 13, 2018
    #21
  3. Rots in hell

    Rots in hell Senior Member

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    Its you ( is) the loozerist Sucker !
     
    Rots in hell, Aug 13, 2018
    #22
  5. storch

    storch banned

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    Okae, I stanned krected.
     
    storch, Aug 13, 2018
    #23
    Mallyboppa likes this.
  7. guerillabedlam

    guerillabedlam _|=|-|=|_

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    my garmamr is iepmccbale, I tulry tkae pirde in hvaing a lrgae vcbaoluray.
     
    guerillabedlam, Aug 13, 2018
    #24
  9. Tyrsonswood

    Tyrsonswood Senior Moment Lifetime Supporter

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    misspeeling...
     
    Tyrsonswood, Aug 13, 2018
    #25
  11. MeAgain

    MeAgain Dazed & Confused Lifetime Supporter Super Moderator

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    I used to have a pocket grammar checker and pocket speller that I used at work before computers and computer spell checkers.

    The English language is hard because it's so versatile and borrows from so many different languages.

    There have been people who have advocated changing the spelling rules for the English language.

    A Plan for the Improvement of Spelling in the English Language
    By Mark Twain

    For example, in Year 1 that useless letter “c” would be dropped to be replased either by “k” or “s”, and likewise “x” would no longer be part of the alphabet. The only kase in which “c” would be retained would be the “ch” formation, which will be dealt with later. Year 2 might reform “w” spelling, so that “which” and “one” would take the same konsonant, wile Year 3 might well abolish “y” replasing it with “i” and iear 4 might fiks the “g/j” anomali wonse and for all.

    Generally, then, the improvement would kontinue iear bai iear with iear 5 doing awai with useless double konsonants, and iears 6-12 or so modifaiing vowlz and the rimeiniing voist and unvoist konsonants. Bai iear 15 or sou, it wud fainali bi posibl tu meik ius ov thi ridandant letez “c”, “y” and “x”—bai now jast a memori in the maindz ov ould doderez —tu riplais “ch”, “sh”, and “th” rispektivili.

    Fainali, xen, aafte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform, wi wud hev a lojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe Ingliy-spiking werld.
     
    MeAgain, Aug 13, 2018
    #26
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  13. storch

    storch banned

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    I could probably cite something from this site to challenge that statement.
     
    storch, Aug 13, 2018
    #27
  15. Visexual

    Visexual Member

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    This one hit home for me. One of the teen books I wrote years ago had just such an error. In the book, 'Cyanide Kills Rats', there was a part where a family was visiting Vegas. The family was having dinner and the young daughter was going to do something after. The line was originally written, "After they ate Karen". Now my wife was a teacher and she didn't catch it. I had two aunts, also both retired teachers, and they didn't catch it. The editor of Denlingers Publishing, where it was to be published the first time, didn't catch it. I caught it when I proof read it myself just before sending the final manuscript in. One comma made a real difference. "After they ate, Karen". Although, now that I think about it, a little incest or cannibalism may have made it sell more copies. Ha!
     
    Visexual, Jan 29, 2019
    #28
    Deidre likes this.
  17. Deidre

    Deidre Follow thy heart

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    We are a sick society now, it probably would become a best seller. Fuck commas! lol
     
    Deidre, Jan 29, 2019
    #29
    Visexual likes this.
  19. wilsjane

    wilsjane Nutty Professor HipForums Supporter

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    English has changed a lot within the last century, Just look at the nursery rhymes


    Tradition testifies and history verifies that one Mary at one time was possessed of a member of the genus Ovine whose excellence in blood and neatness of manner had rendered its exterior fringe the colour of the purest driven snow. Wherever did this young lady perambulate, the aforementioned quadruped would presently approximate thither.


    Tradition testifies and history verifies that one Mary at one time was possessed of a member of the genus Ovine

    MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB

    whose excellence in blood and neatness of manner had rendered its exterior fringe the colour of the purest driven snow.

    WHO'S FEET WERE WHITE AS SNOW

    Wherever did this young lady perambulate,

    EVERYWHERE THAT MARY WENT

    the aforementioned quadruped would presently approximate thither.

    THE LAMB WOULD ALWAYS GO


    Taken from a paper published at Oxford university, over 100 years ago.
     
    wilsjane, Jan 29, 2019
    #30
    MeAgain likes this.
  21. BJintheUK

    BJintheUK Members

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    Good one wilsjane, but in the nursery rhyme it was the lamb's FLEECE that was white as snow, not its FEET! :)
     
    BJintheUK, Feb 5, 2021
    #31
  23. wooleeheron

    wooleeheron Brain Damaged Lifetime Supporter

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    Its feet were fleecy, and flighty too. :)
     
    wooleeheron, Feb 5, 2021
    #32
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