Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer

only on weekends


Why are gnomes so creepy?

 

So they can attract other little creep gnomes.

Why do many people assume dragons are bad?

 

Because many people spend all day getting stoned.


Why are my feet cold?

 

'cause your girlfriend is pregnant

why are hamsters so small?

 

so they fit on the plate better


why do mice like cheese?

 

They drink a lot of wine.

Who would win in a fight between Steven Segal and Jean-Claude Van Damme?

 

the "straight to video" market


why is Bugs Bunny a bunny?

 

So Elmer Fudd doesn't shoot himself out of boredom.


why is the pink panther pink??

 

because hes a real cool cat

why doesnt roadrunner ever get caught by the cayote?

 

because the roadrunner is faster than the coyote

why does porky pig stutter?

 

because his curly tail is tickling him

why does coffee taste so damn good?

 

Its made by the same people that brought you cocaine.

Why cant I have some cocaine with my coffee??

 

because your poor and can't afford cocaine


why do i have a headache?

 

because your brain is shrinking


why do I always have gas?

 

because you've been eating mexican food for the past week


why wasn't the lost marathon on sci-fi tonight?

 

because the tapes got lost.....duh



why is the evening news so depressing?

 

because newscasters are a bunch of downers


why is the earth round?

 

its a lie....they want you to think its round


why does butter melt?

 

cuz it's a liquid not a solid

why are there 7 days in a week?

 

because 365 divides by seven equally


why do computers have fans