Ask A Good Question, Get An Exceptionally Stupid Answer.

No it was on a dare.

Is work more fun when the boss is not around.

 

Boss or no boss, work is not fun!

Why is it illegal to shoot eagles?

 

Because they shoot back.


Why is ice cream so damn good??

 

Frozen things mask the real flavor.

If someone wrote a song about you would you tell everyone?

 

No, I would stand outside their window and play it on a big ol boombox.


Should everyone be getting the hell out of west Washington state?

 

I do what i want. You dont know me. If i want to have unprotected sex with 20 people a night i will because i do what i want. If i want to stay in west washington i will. You dont know me, i do what i want.


Was jerry springer back in the day the best talk show?

 

No, it was a mediocre fight club.


If he were still alive, do you think Trump would invite Morton Downey, Jr. to be his veep?

 

He is alive in fact he is all over the news. But i dont think morton downey jr.is

Does this dirt smell funny?

 

Yes. Run.


If bluebirds fly over the rainbow, what makes Dorothy think that's special, first of all... and second, why did she think she should be able to fly because a bird can fly?

 

Because when she was flying around in the house she didnt realize how much wind power that takes. She just thought if a house can fly then i can fly.

How is you're day going their? Is their any thing they're that makes ewe wish your somewhere else?

 

Yes! Intentional mispelling, and vampire bats.

Why should I not do extreme exercise in hot weather?

 

I can think of no reason. go at it, just make sure not to drink anything 12 hours before. and when you start sweating profusely you have to make sure to stay in a warm area.

would you feel guilty if you gave someone some obvious bad advice as a joke and then they died because of it?

 

Only if someone besides myself knew that I had done so.

How often should I clean my refrigerator?

 

Never. Just buy a new one.


What's the best advice for someone who's having a bad trip?

 

Take another hit and maybe it won't be the stuff that gives bad trips.

Why does the rose Bush have thorns if the goat is going to eat it anyway.

 

Because in the dawn, the goats are mad as Hemingway.
(In my head, I'm singing your line and mine like they're in a song.)


What is the best thing to do with inspiration?




Edit: In fact, I just recorded myself singing those lines.
I'll probably never do anything with it, but I like it as part of the lyrics of a song.
So, maybe someday...

 

Dry it and put it in a grinder. Remove stems, and have at it.

Exactly why can't you teach an old dog new tricks?

 

Because I'm not professionally trained... plus, I just don't feel like it.


Pepsi or Coke?

 

why cant one have both? if you put some coke in your pepsi you have a great tasting cola that will keep you up all night. it might numb the back of your throat but its nothing some pepsi wont sooth.

wherrrrrres johonny?

 

Out looking for an axe.

What is the primary cause of bad breath?