Are Women More Superficial?

applespark... i wasnt being critical of you on a personal level... my questioning was with Libertine...he sometimes has a noble attitude to women and at other times a disrespectful one..i find him confusing and refuse to be baited!

 

Libertine, you sound a lot like some guys I used to know.
I overheard one of them talking to a woman who sold shoes downtown. They were talking about how all she had to do was appeal to the shopper's ego to sell the shoes. "Those look so cute on you!" "You'll get hired for sure if you wear those!" ..Etc. And you know what: they're right. A lot of people are suckers if you flatter them. There are a few thought-routes you can follow from there. For instance, humans are pretty stupid and superficial, egotistical, and driven by the crudest of ulterior urges. How depressing and boring. It gets especially depressing when all the people you meet are like that.
What if you took it a level higher/deeper. Such as, why are people like that? Why are peoples' egos starving? Perhaps it goes all the way back to those crucial years when they were children. Learning that they were 'bad and wrong' for taking their friend's toy without asking, or that they were 'bad and wrong' because they felt anger and let it out (aka temper tantrum).
I feel it comes down to the core beliefs that people construct when they're young, usually using their parent's and peers' blueprints. All of the 'Should's.' I shouldn't eat this, I shouldn't feel this way (<big one), I should look this way. People become hungry when they feel unfulfilled. People feel unfulfilled when they aren't in this moment, or they believe something that isn't true to them--such as a 'should'. There are all kinds of things in this world that we can try to feed that hunger with. Because humans can never fill that empty spot with things outside of them, they become keep trying and trying. This is called addiction. Food, new shoes, chocolate, casual sex, wrist/thigh cutting, gossip, cigarettes, alcohol... are all very common addictions.

Do you see what I'm saying? People aren't inherently superficial. People are intrinsically divine. Beautiful. Graceful. When they deny it and believe in those beliefs that our culture teaches, it creates this emptiness in them, which is merely a lack of truth. Truth quenches suffering. Suffering is cheating on your groom, because then you can never have a true relationship with them--you have cheated yourself.

Namaste, libertine!

White Ginger

 

I have known both men and women that could be considered superficial, for all the reasons mentioned already by other posters. I have known many more who have a great deal of depth, who genuinely care about other people, and genuinely care about learning about themselves, and the world around them. Maybe I'm the minority, but most of the people I know have true character and "soul". That has been the case for quite awhile now...superficial folks of either gender don't stay in my world for long. Maybe ya' need to change your circle of friends and acquaintenances, if you're so inclined. There are lots of wonderful women and men out there...and, I don't think that they are that rare.

 

Like another poster pointed out, a large amouht of products are marketed towards women. I can't help but wonder if our society encourages women to be superficial, or if women are superficial and society is taking advantage of it. Does superficiality give women some sort of evolutionary benefit of sorts? I mean, if women are naturally superficial then there has to be a reason, or benefit to us, right?

Libertine, you got me thinkin...that's for sure!

 

thats like an oxymoron... "naturally superficial"

Things are target marketed to women because women are superficial. ( not all) but most women die their hair..ware makeup...and or try to cover up something abou them with something you can buy. Its not always bad but it can get out of hand. I'm sure credit card comanies love it! Department stores love it and cosmetic companies love it. Oh and lets not forget the food indestry. The tabaco indestry...and the media indestry. Media makes the model of what you want to be like and you go buy it. It's glamorous to do or be this or that...people are obese and people are anorexic and people are angry and people are drug addicts but theres always something to buy to help them feel better...be it pills...breasts...fake nails or whatever women will buy it.
If peopel were happy with what they have then it would not be a problem. Objects make people "happy" and women are always looking for happiness...symbols of weath...or status. Unfortunately inner happiness is harder to get but it's there if you work at it.

 

Men do this too btw I think a lot of men just hate to part with money though and may just be too lazy to go shopping. Given the cash I bet a lot of men would very well go on a spending spree.

 

I don't think it's just girls that have this problem, I think there are guys out there with just the same superficial pseudo-goth,punk,hippie etc...crap and that its equal to both sexes and the youth just needs to be educated and give a damn about whats important because they dont and it makes me just as angry as it does you.

 

but honestly women totaly do this more then men.

 

Both boys and girls tend to be superficial.

Some men and women are also. It's difficult for me to figure out if sports or fashions are more superficial.

(Yes, I know I'm using stereotypes.)

 

sports is a hobbie It gets superficial when it takes over your life. I think of superficial as material objects. My husband has never been into sports and Im not superficial but everyones got their shit anyways lol even without it all were all jsut so dang human

 

Ladies who got what I am saying, "Thank You". I would never level an insult at women as proposed by some. I think AppleSpark and Sera got on the plane I'm riding here. It really isn't about women in general, but about the majority of non-thinking people. It just so happens that many women fall into this category more often.

A big thumbs up to you ladies from me! I appreciate and adore thinking individuals to the highest degree.

 

Libertine,
not all women are superficial; but I'm sure you knew that.
But I guess on some level I'd have to agree that the majority are, but it's not just women; more and more I see guys who put so much goddamned gel in their hair you could cook some french fries in all that grease.

I personally, couldn't ever cheat on a man I was with, ever. Nor could I have sexual relations with anyone I didn't have *something* with. So, my point is, not all women are like that. They may be rare, but not all of them are.

Ugh, I don't even know what I'm trying to say. Fuck it.

 

By the way, the slang the "Britney Wannabes" use makes me want to go on a kiling spree.

 

I agree I do see the many, many more guys going this way as well now. It's all about the mainstream media version of "what's cool".

The 60s represented, to me, when I look it at as a time of more tolerance within the hip community. People didn't have to choreograph a break dance routine to dance at a party. People could wear rags and still be "cool". Everybody did their own thing. Now, it is so manufactured.

I fucking hate it. I admit.

 

RE: But I guess on some level I'd have to agree that the majority are, but it's not just women; more and more I see guys who put so much goddamned gel in their hair you could cook some french fries in all that grease.

Blame feminism. Didn't SCUM say something about keeping feminised men around?

 

In the wild it is usually the male that is elaborately colored and putting on impressive displays for the female. The female is always the more bland color, and with no intrest in putting on a show.

We could consider that even though it is the male putting on the display it is, in reality, the female being superficial, because she has no intrest in a male that isn't anything but impressive. Maybe give those animals higher intelligence and ability and those females would be considering their own apperance in the mirror, rather than being so picky about the males appearance.

Eh, this is all speculation on my part.

 

i think women like pretty things and like to decorate themselves, as a form of self expression. but i've seen more beautiful women with ugly men than i've ever seen ugly women with beautiful men.

 

That's a really good point...

 

if i'm not mistaken, the females are 'bland' because they tend to sit on the nest and need better camoflauge. bring bright red or blue doesn't exactly blend in with a pine tree.

furthermore, unless you are able to read the minds of birds, you can't really tell what the female is looking for or what her critera for a mate is. perhaps the displays are signs of health and vitality, which means her offsping would inherit his healthy traits... NOT that she is being shallow and wants her babies to have "pretty colors."

 

There are plenty of studies regarding the reasons why the male birds are bright, I am not ignorant of those. We know that the bright plumage shows health, vitality, and strength in a male, but the female bird doesn't know this. She just naturally prefers the most impressive looking male. All I am suggesting is that women may have or at least in the past had some sort of natural evolutionarily benificial reason for acting what many would consider superficial. I was using examples of animals in the wild where appearance (or the seemingly superficial) plays an important role in the propegation of the species.

Basically, I am trying to say that women's seeming "superficiality" may not just be simply that, but possibly a byproduct of natural evolution mixing with social evolution.