I might ramble, I’m known for that. Anyways, short story long… I have a terrible anxiety for the past year and a half now that has been known to be incredibly bad in the mornings that at one point was causing me to quit jobs and just end up in the fetal position on the living room floor. I work a job where I sometimes am able to reverse overdoses and administer CPR and first aid on a fairly consistent basis and also not everyone is saved… lots of lost limbs(from drug use…), some suicide, stuff you don’t want to know about to be honest. Mental health… turning women away on a cold night because they refuse to bandage their recently amputated limb… I’m sorry. You can see where I’m going though. I work in the Tenderloin of SF IYKYK…Lots of darkness there but we bring what light we can the job has its stressors. I also acquired a newborn son(ah I can’t say that now he’s already 14 months) and a stepdaughter in the last two years and got of prison almost four years ago after doing seven. suddenly this anxiety hits… Coincidentally psychedelics entered my life around the same time… could have been sooner. I dread them. I purposefully work stuff out on them. DMT but mostly gram and a half mushroom trips at night seem to work wonders. do you guys think peyote would be good for this as well… mushrooms are literally a miracle. SSRI’s can burn in hell for all I’m concerned that’s officially the hardest thing to get off of for me. So yay or nay?
I'm sorry that you're dealing with anxiety and a lot of traumatic situations. Good on ya' for doing some really tough front-line life-saving work. I've heard people report psychedelics have been helpful for depression, though I've also heard people say they worked for depression for a while, but then suddenly they stopped working and things were worse than they were before. I think it they can produce some short-term benefits, and I'm 100% for research on this, but I'll be very skeptical that psychedelics are a long term solution until I see some evidence to actually back the claim. I'm assuming the same is true for any effects it has on anxiety. There are some alternative treatments that work well for anxiety though: Alternative Treatments for Physical and Mental Illness The SF area has some of the best traditional Chinese medicine available anywhere in North America, btw. There are also some good self-treatment methods: Self-Treatment Methods for Physical and Mental Health The acupressure self-massage, dietary changes, and a meditation practice might be very helpful. Cultivating an attitude of acceptance may be helpful. Believing in karma, or at least cultivating an ability to entertain it as a possibility, may be a way to do that. If you can save someone, great, they've reaped some of their good karma. You can't help...then maybe they're burning away some of their bad karma. I could say more about karma yoga, but I'm rambling... I hope something can help.
It sounds like you have PTSD, which would be perfectly understandable given your job. So approach it like that. Cannabis can also help to allow you to sleep, and lessen the anxiety without stronger psychedelics. You can also get treatment for PTSD which might entail discussing your experiences which you just did!
