Another question about the nature of love.

Ok so last time I asked whether you guys & girls think love is a feeling or an emotional state.

I've been thinking a lot lately about missed chances and how I should be more strategic with my relationships and try to plan my life out around them properly. I think I may be, to a certain degree, guilty of thinking like I'm from China or something.

Here in the west, I know the common belief is that love is a feeling (rather than an emotional state) and that it can suddenly show up when two people who are truly compatible find each other and 'fall in love'. This is the basis we are told we should use to make our decisions regarding relationships and marriage -- at least in the west.

So I ask you, do you think love is something that is purposefully cultivated, or do you think love is something that just shows up when it is meant to?

(of course, in reality, it must be some combination of the two, just as with the feeling vs. emotional state debate, but I'd still like to have some others weigh in on this, particularly people from different cultures -- because I find it very interesting how differently different societies view the nature of love)

What do you think?

 

Well I ain't from a different culture but I can say that I don't think love is something that just happens. While I agree that it can be spontaneous I feel as though there is always something to cultivate that. For example if you see a woman playing guitar and you think it's beautiful so you then think about how you like to play guitar and maybe it goes from there. I also believe that love breaks a lot easier than it is made sometimes

 

It's a false debate, and that's why you can't solve this riddle, because it's a paradox and the answer is that it's both.

And to make it more complicated there are different types of love. (parental, best friend, kindred-spirit, romantic, enhanced romantic usually at the spouse-marriage level that has lasted a long long time)

To also add a 3rd layer of difficulty, love can be confused with lust, especially in the initial phases.

 

this sums it up pretty well.

why does it even matter? you find love or you don't. make do, or you don't.

what do people from China think like..?

 

Yeah I guess that's what I figured too, but a lot of people actually see it in very different terms. It's definitely not seen the same way by all people.

It;s obviously not always like this, but in China many people practically have resumes for finding their partner and it is a decision based very much on economics and benefit rather than sponateous love sort of things,