My mate has been (among other things) floridly "tinfoil hat" psychotic for quite a while. In her psychotic rages, she's been viciously verbally and mentally abusive towards me; so much so doctors on several occasions asked privately if I was being physically battered as well. I used to dismiss it as just her 'crazy' talking, but then it occurred to me; what if this is actually her true feelings; straight from her limbic system, bypassing the social filters of her frontal cortex? She's in remission at the moment, but now has a definite Borderline edge to her personality. There's precious little affection, quite a bit of insulting and demeaning behavior (she can flip between the two with head-spinng speed), and a lot of explicit and subtextural thoughts, verbalizations, and behaviors of leaving me. I'm starting to think that she only remains here because she has no other viable option. Relationships require work, attention, and a significant emotional investment. I'm feeling a lot of ambivalence right now and am having difficulty staying motivated enough to stay sufficiently engaged.
This sounds like a real tough thing to ride out - I don't know if I could handle the verbal assault of someone who is supposed to be a partner in life. Why do you think you feel ambivalent? Do you think it is hard to become emotionally detached from her even though she hurls these insults at you, and distances herself from you with little signs of affection or care? I don't know - rough spots come along in any relationship - it's never easy to objectively evaluate it sometimes - emotions get in the way. I just see you as someone who needs to take care of yourself and see value in yourself - maybe a little distance between you and her will help. Relationships do require a lot of work - sometimes more work than we have the energy or desire to put into them... but relationships are two way streets - not just taking with no return. Wishing and sending you peace, dear man.
If you throw a dinner plate against the wall, it'll shatter. Yes; I can pick up the pieces, glue them back together, and it'll function as a dinner plate again... but it'll never be the same.
Have you ever noticed how this runs in time with here monthly cycle. Hormone imbalance is something that affects a lot of women, but the common factor is that they wont admit it. This also gets worse, not better, following the menopause. Put simply, when a woman's oestrogen levels drop, the imbalance between that and her testosterone levels become almost impossible for her to handle. hormone replacement therapy is the answer, but getting her to admit that she needs it is the problem. Their is an old joke about family planning,... Only make love when she is in a foul mood,... The science behind it, makes it very true.
