Amazing coworker turned me down. what to do?

That's lame.
Have some dignity.

 

So you are not getting a date, but are obligated to stay and not get a date?

It sounds to me like user behavior. You are not good enough to dress up for or go home with, but good enough to buy her drinks. You can flirt with her but not touch, though you are not allowed to have someone who lets you have both.

It sounds to me less like friend zone and more like the guy you call to do the shit your friends can't be bothered to.

 

lol. it's a shitty job environment unless i have a girlfriend there it might make it worth it. besides why would i stay when she turned me down and i have other job options?

alot. like i said i'd give her a 9 out of 10 on looks and 10 out of 10 on personality.

 

NEO... Where ya been!!??

haven't seen you around here much in a long time.
hope all is going good for ya. :2thumbsup:







I used to be PB_Smith

 

Your decision about your job should in no way hinge on her reactions to your sexual advances.

And if you do change jobs, you certainly shouldn't go up to her with some "you are never going to see me again look what you've done" guilt-trip. That's crazy. I know you were probably at least partly joking about that, but you should get that type of thinking out of your head ASAP. It's weak and very unattractive quality.

It just seems like you think about her way more than she thinks about you.

Also, just as a footnote, I would not want to work with my girlfriend lol, especially not in a shitty environment.

What's up man,
How's life?

 

i wouldn't guilt trip her about it, i would tell her the reason i am quitting is because it is such a shitty environment. also just to give her a heads up just to make sure she doesn't want to change her mind before i walk out the door.

shitty environment, no free time, and no girls. why stay? i told them they have 1 week and they need to cut down my hours because i want my free-time back. this week i am scheduled for about 65 hours.

the most i have ever worked was 85 hours a week in a good environment. 65 hours in a bad environment translates to at least 150 of those good hours.

really the only reason i would stay is because there was some insanely hot chick there for me. but she doesn't seem to be all that interested.

 

Never guilt trip a girl or cling to her once she's given you a firm no.

Whenever I got friend zoned I just played it cool and told her that if she ever had a hot girlfriend looking for a date, to give me a recommendation.

And sometimes I'd pick a girls brain for the reasons why I got friendzoned. The advice is varied, but it's still a good 2 cents insight into one female, sometimes you can learn from it and other times you can't because it was purely subjective to what she was looking for in a guy.

 

how is letting her know i'm leaving guilt tripping?

if a girl won't date me, in no way am I obligated to hang around and be her friend.

why not? i've worked in places where personal life and work life heavily overlap. so why wouldn't personal life affect work life and vice versa?

in a communal environment there is no 'work life' or 'personal life' it is all just 'life.' really that is where i draw my standards from.

if i don't like this job i have a right to quit, especially when i have other employers that are just as good or better waiting for me. her dating me would have made a difference in that.

 

But it's the customer service that deserves better, as one might put it, equal opportunity. And that goes before the new millennium too.:bobby:

 

I always say mixing work and pleasure only leads to disaster... Sure maybe there is a good point in the middle but it typically ends bad. Say for example things did work out with you guys, and then you see her flirt with customers or some other cute guy it's going to drive you nuts, but she's just working it and doing her job...

It's one thing if you can keep your emotions out of it and develop a loose friendship / fb relationship with her, but that's next to impossible and sounds like you're already way over that line anyway.

Proceed however you want, and in the end "nothing ventured, nothing gained" as the saying goes but that said the addendum to that saying should be "when playing with fire, torture is absolute."

 

Because it is not, depending on how you phase your reasons for leaving, why your leaving, and basically your intentions consciously or subconsciously by telling her you are going to quit.

Guilt tripping can happen within that framework of how you tell her, but it isn't a default scenario. Just keep your reasons for leaving brief, and she can assume what she wants, but surely if your other reasons for leaving the job are valid and are something she can relate to given experience at the same establishment, surely if she's secure enough will let you move on.

 

Haven't seen you say one thing about this girl's personality... only that she is a 9 out of 10 so I'm guessing you just want to fuck her and not really looking to find "the one." In that case, first rule of dating is always have options... I don't care if it's your fat neighbor or a married chick you'd never really do anything with. But flirt, open some doors for yourself and you have options. That changes your demeanor and life and makes you instantly more attractive to women. Now, once you've gotten that sorted out, you work on her... you can hang out with her some, but not all the time like you're desperate. When you do, flirt with her and make it clear you think she's attractive. If she pushes you away, then she was just friend-zoning you. If she keeps you around, it's because she wants to keep HER options open. Women like options. They like attention and ego-boosting. They may turn a guy down one day and be crushing on him the next week. They change their minds and feelings. Their situations change... they're constantly in relationships and then breaking up. If you've done all of the above, you can wait until one of those nights when she's horny and drinking, and get her back to your place or hers just to talk and drink more, while upping the flirting. Then go for it. Maybe she'll want to date you afterwards or just fuck so be prepared for either (also more attractive to women). Of course, you need to be decent looking yourself. Don't be wasting our time by being a 2 and thinking you can get a 9. And never choose a job or not based on a girl.