Advice For A Man Dating A Bisexual Feminist?

One of the many things I dig about this girl is how she clearly has no regard for dating rules. On our first date we went to several places, getting drunk in the process, and then she invited herself over my place. Then, the next day, I was poundering how to proceed (do I text her? Do I wait? Blah Blah) and then before I could decided she texted me and invited to do something with her that night. Then, for our "third date" I really wanted to be manly and take her out to a restaurant of my choosing and have an official date and so on, but then, on the way there she suggested a completely different place, so I went along with it to be polite but it did kind of bug me. It's a totally stupid thing to let bother me but it made me think. She also made a comment like "You don't have to worry about gender roles with me" which kinda made it click in my head that her being both bisexual and a feminist might make this a little different than my past relationships. She's definitely 1000 times more interesting than the girls I've dated in the past and I'm really enjoying it so far. Just worried I'm going to blow it somehow, which is also totally unexpected and kind of killing my cool.

 

My Advice Would Be Run For Your Life Whilst You Still Can......



Cheers Glen.

 

In her hair, chics love that

 

If you want to pick a restaurant, it's ok to put your foot down.

I personally would never date a girl who identified herself as a feminist, so I can't really relate.

Imho, don't worry about blowing it. The stress it will cause you isn't worth it. Just accept that there is always a chance that any relationship doesn't work out and be ok with whatever happens.

Hope that everything works out

 

I don't see the bisexual feminist question. You don't seem to be having any of the problems typically related to those things.

Se just sounds reasonably forward - the elusive chick with a dude brain.

 

Enjoy the relationship.

 

They havent done the dirty yet, lets get an update after that

 

Lol, and when they find that elusive one, get pissy she wants to sleep with every.second guy and call her a slut

 

I dont see the problem. She's an assertive, alpha female who isn't afraid to make plans and suggestions - is this really so rare?

just suggest what to do on the next date. No biggie.

 

This should prove to be very enlightening for you. I don't say that to be condescending, but you will learn a lot about yourself and what you like and don't like- how attached you are to those gender roles. That said, it sounds like she is used to being in charge. You may need to be a little more assertive (in a healthy way, of course) about what you want than you are used to being in relationships. If this makes you feel emasculated, then I think you should ask yourself why. Is she actually bossing you around and never giving you a say or is your ego bruised because you're used to being catered to?

I had a relationship kind of like this recently with a bisexual man. He started out doing the traditional holding doors and paying for dates because I think that's what he thought I expected, but the more we talked about it, the more I realized he was not your run of the mill typical dude, and he didn't believe this stuff should be automatic. Our personalities clashed for a lot of reasons and it eventually ended, but I learned more from that relationship than any other I've been in about what I want and what I can compromise on. So if you feel like it's not working out, and you're looking for something more traditional (which is totally valid), don't fret. You stepped out of your comfort zone and had an experience. As long as you are respectful and don't put her down for not being the way you want her to be, it's all good. Who knows? You might end up liking her style better than the more traditional girls and end up with her in the end.

 

Yeah, what Firefly said, you will learn a lot about yourself.

Although Firefly ends it with maybe she'll be the one you end up with....well not if those non conforming gender rules means she never really.wants happily ever after with just the one

Sometimes bisexual means romance with the opposite sex, sex with same sex cos they know which buttons to press. You wont be as impressed a year down the track if your just the chump paying for dates not getting any nookie cos she gets off quicker and easier with girls

 

but that's traditionally the male's job, and she said not to worry about gender roles.

 

That's the kind of shit you have to put up with in a relationship with a self-professed "feminist." No thanks. I prefer traditional, feminine women who aren't always trying to one-up men. Those are the types of women I am attracted to (more often than not they are foreign women). Not women with butch haircuts and armpit hair. Penis envy is just not an attractive trait. When I am out with a woman, I NEVER let her pay for anything. Yes, I am a firm believer in gender roles and traditional, functional relationships. I do not like feminism or feminists. If a man tries to assert his manliness, he is an asshole. Why don't the same standards apply to women who wish they were men??

 

here's some advice: don't

 

To be honest, I'm not perfectly sure what you're asking here. You have the girl and you're both having fun. So, what is the dilemma? I'm going to assume it's because she keeps deciding what to do for the next date. I guess that's a problem, but I think there's a simple solution for it. Just tell her no because you have other plans for a date or be like "Oh, that's cool, but I had this in mind for a date. You want to do that instead?"

 

Lol what? Didn't you apply the same standard many times within your rant?

This post just makes me laugh. Having a preference for submissive women is fine, but if a woman dares to suggest a restaurant or pick up the tab once in a while it doesn't mean she has penis envy or a butch haircut or wants to be a man. It doesn't even mean she calls herself a feminist. It means she doesn't want to eat at the crappy restaurants you always pick and it probably means she makes more money than you.

 

If you dig her, get to know her, and treat her like a guy friend. You might be surprised at what happens.

 

You are awesome, Meliai ^_^
I couldn't agree more!!

 

Tis With A Deep Sadness In My Heart I Make This Post...... :bigcry:

This Thread Was His Last Cry Of Help To The Outside World And Was Made April 9th,

Nothing Has Been Heard Of Him Since Then.

I Can Only Guess She Discovered His Thread Then Proceded To Kick The Life Out Of Him

With Her Maroon Doc Martins And Then Smother Him In Her Hairy Armpits......

RIP thatsall, And RIP To The Many Men Who Have Fallen Before You..... :bigcry:



Tears Glen.