ADULT Jokes... (Not for the offendable)

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Christmas is coming??

 

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My favourite joke. Needless to say has to include an Irishman.

Three builders were sitting eating their lunchtime sandwiches When Rob suddenly said, "Cheese again, if I get another cheese sandwich, I am going to throw myself off the top of the scaffolding".
When Jock opened his roast beef sandwiches, he said. " I like roast beef, but not every day for ten years, If I get roast beef tomorrow, I am going to join you".
Paddy got his usual ham and decided that he too would jump if he got the same the following day.

Their wives all met up at their funerals and both Rob and Jock's wives were distraught, saying that if only they had been asked, they would have varied their husbands lunches.

Paddy's wife just stood there looking bemused and said,....... "Paddy made his own sandwiches every morning".

 

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From the use of the word "Garda", you can see that the Irish enjoy being the victim of their own jokes.

A few that our daughter collected while we were living in Ireland.

Paddy was confused when the foreman on the building site offered him two shovels and told him to take his pick.

Paddy ended up giddy when his friends put him in a barrel and told him to stand in the corner.

Paddy hated draughts so much that he turned the fan off on his helicopter

Paddy jumped off the scaffolding after the foreman told him that during WW2 he had flown Wellingtons.


Although it was more than 20 years ago when she heard the sandwich joke, our daughter still makes people laugh with it today.

 

My ex-wife's family are Irish - We still get on - the banter goes down as wel as the Guinness