A question for married bisexual men

KD23:

If I had a dollar for every "straight" guy, who, after getting blown by another guy for the first time, remarks, "Fuck, you suck cock better than a woman!"

I certainly have read enough over the years that a lot of "straight"/bi guys are surprised as all hell that getting a blowjob from anther dude is totally mind-blowing.

I've also read that this is often true, because who else but another MAN really KNOWS just where to hit the "hot spots" on another man's body? (again, I'm going by what I've read over the course of many years)

Though, as you know, I'm a a DIE-HARD "ass man", I've always got really turned on watching vids of hunky, masculine guys (or just ordinary "guy next door" types) deep-throating a big, thick cock, and going to town like there was no tomorrow.........

 

They get surprised because even though - and as I say - there isn't a guy who doesn't know that men suck cock - knowing it and experiencing it are two very different things, and I have yet to meet a guy who wasn't under the impression that being sucked by a guy was unimaginably different from being sucked by a girl. So, when a guy who knows how to shlob the knob and polish that dome gets ahold of their dick, it's usually pretty mind-blowing and, yeah, if I had that dollar you mentioned for every time I heard that...

Is it true that only a man knows what a man needs? I never really thought so because (a) everyone's needs are truly different, (b) our bodies are different, (c) our mindset about having sex with a guy is different and can affect both performance and reception and (d) not every guy gets the hang of having sex with a guy. How many newbies have said to me or ask, "How do I suck your dick?" and it's an understandable question because if you've never done it before, even if you've seen it done, doing it is a whole different critter and I've told guys, "Do it the way you like to have your dick sucked..." but the rub has always been... what if he's never been sucked before (and this is why he's with me)? Or I've told some guys that if they know how to eat pussy, they know how to suck dick because if you suck a girl's clitty, well, her clit is the female version of our dick. Take it from there. Doesn't work with newbie gay dudes who've never had sex with a woman, so I've said, "Stick your thumb in your mouth and suck and lick it..."

Over time, you should get to be able to figure out a man's body, where to "look" for his buttons and know how to go about pushing them and some guys never really figure it out. Now, one of the things I blame for this huge disconnect is... porn. Guys watch porn and get it into their head that (a) sucking a man's dick is easy, (b) big huge cocks are the best to suck, (c) taking a dick down deep is pretty simple and (d) when the guy cums, he's supposed to jerk off and cum all over your face because he can't aim it right to get the cum in your mouth.

You haven't lived until you have a guy throw up all over you because he tried to go deep on you but his gag reflex had other ideas and ditto for attempting to swallow for the first time. Some guys are "natural" cocksuckers; by whatever means, the first time they suck a dick will make you wonder if he lied to you when he said he's never done it before and... some guys really do have to learn how to suck a dick, explore whether or not they can, in fact, deep throat a dick and, of course, suck the cum out of a guy instead of getting that porn money shot in the face and more so when, out in the world, if you're a guy and a cocksucker, you are expected and required to swallow the cum unless you have a damned good reason why you don't.

I'm thinking having homey throw up all over you because he just found out that swallowing cum for real isn't as "simple" as it looks in porn is a pretty good reason not to want to do that again but, yeah - a lot of guys don't seem to get that the people they see in porn are (1) professionals and (2) actors playing a role and following a script and even those folks in "amateur" porn are experienced if not professionals, well, I tell new guys to forget everything they've ever seen in porn so they can really learn how to suck cock. And, before I forget, face fucking is not cock sucking.

And if you want to get good at it, practice, practice, practice and, preferably, on some mother's son and not a dildo because you can't get real-life feedback from an inanimate object.

 

KD23:

"Practice makes perfect" (so they say!)

Am curious, though...........

In your many, many experiences of a M2M nature throughout life, have you found that white guys who long lusted to have their butts slammed by a BBC, after the experience, reacted thus:

"Fuck, that was BRUTAL! NEVER again! What the hell was I thinking.....that HURT!"

Or:

Aw, shit, man! A BBC can plow my ass anytime.....fuck, that was fucking great!"

As you and I have already discussed, for many white guys who have long lusted to have their butts fucked by a BBC, often find out their "fantasy" was just that; the "reality" of the fucking was just too much for their ass to handle.

Also, now recall that M2M interracial porn site, "It's Gonna Hurt", where white guys get their tight asses PLOWED by HUGE black cocks.

At least the NAME of the site "tells it like it is"!

Then again, a HUGE cock (of ANY color) is REALLY going to rip apart another guy's butt, and race/color has NOTHING to do with the size of that pulsating, sperm-spitting shaft, buried deep between another guy's assmounds...........

 

I've heard them say, "Well, uh that was different..." or "It didn't hurt as bad as I thought it would!" Some said afterward that it wasn't something they'd want to do all of the time and some said that once was enough. Really, my cock ain't ginormous but I'm not all that small, either... and it's all about how you prepare a guy to be penetrated and for those new to getting poked in the bum, yeah, it's gonna hurt going in and there's not a whole lot to be done for it. I know there's some lube on the market that has benzocaine in it and it's supposed to numb things up so that the pain of penetration ain't all that ... but there are guys huffing poppers for the relaxation and euphoric effects.

I've boned white guys in the butt under the influence of alcohol and I think most of them were so relaxed and buzzed that they didn't really feel me in them until I got deeper into them and... it feels weird; it feels like I gotta take a shit but it feels good at the same time. Of those two things you mentioned, I have never, ever heard a white guy that I've fucked say anything like that. The fixation on big black cocks just makes me shake my head but, then again, I'm prejudiced because I grew up being fucked by guys with big black cocks and... I'm not impressed and even less when a guy with a BBC is fucking me and all I feel is pain and discomfort.

 

KD23:

It is inded strange why when gay/bi guys are discussing huge cocks, chances are they are only talking about BBC.

In all my years of getting off on M2M porn, even I can tell you that cock-size has NOTHING to do with the ethnicity of the guy who owns it.....shit, I've seen plenty of WHITE guys that were hung like fucking MULES!

Oh, well, to each his own............

 

The question is: Does one really have to be hung in order to have good sex with someone? The answer is: No. Our society got sold on "bigger is better" and that included men's cocks, women's breasts and ass - but not their pussies for some reason - and from the time I learned that my ding-a-ling could go inside of a girl - and it felt pretty darn good - guys with big dicks have been preferred over guys who don't have a big dick and... it doesn't really make any sense since women loved to say, "It's not the size of the boat but the motion of the ocean!" and then... guys turned into size queens. What is the world coming to? I got rejected by a guy because my dick was 1/4" shorter than his preference. I'm baffled because I'm trying to figure out how and why a quarter of an inch was going to make that much of a difference but, apparently that guy thought so and the deal was broken. What irked me was he only had a 5" dick but that didn't matter to me.

Imagine me sitting here rolling my eyes. As previously mentioned, my late son-in-law had nine thick inches and according to my daughter and two other women, he'd be a better lover... with some serious training. He bragged that he'd never cum from being sucked - and that was a backhanded slight to my daughter by the way - and I had him busting in my mouth inside of five minutes the first and every time I sucked his dick. I'm sure I hurt his feelings when I told him that I'd had dicks bigger than his and that I thought having such big dicks were overrated. Seen plenty of white guys with big dicks and I've had quite a few who were quite hung and... so what?

When was the last time you heard a white guy say that he wanted a BWC to suck on and to painfully stretch his hole out? You hear or read where white guys fantasize getting their hands on a well-hung guy which I guess is any guy that isn't listed under the description and definition for BBC but the question I've had and asked - and haven't gotten an answer to - is... how does a guy who has never even touched another man's cock let alone could stand to see other men naked decide that for his first time out the gate, he wants a guy with a dick between eight and ten inches? How does that work?

I was online and chatting with a guy the other day looking to lose his male version of virginity and everything he was writing started with some version of the word "prefer" and he even admitted that he decided to check me out because (1) I'm Black and (2) I must be hung like an elephant. I don't think he was happy when I told him that my cock size didn't meet his preferences nor did he deign to answer me when I asked him why he had this big dick preference.

A dick is a dick. Does it work the way it's supposed to? Is it clean and free of diseases? Are you willing to let me suck your dick until you can't get it up anymore? If your answers are yes, yes, and bring it, homey, then the size of your dick shouldn't be and isn't an issue and more so when, again, I've had bigger.

 

KD23:

"A dick is a dick"

Could NOT agree more.

That ALL black men are hung like horses is an old tired,, well-worn stereotypes that has even found its way into films and other entertainment venues (jokes, puns, etc)

You are right; you hear so many guys who talk about getting their itchy hands on a BBC, but how many white guys do you hear fantasizing over BWC, in comparison?

I've seen countless of photos of men with thick, elongated trouser pythons, and, in ALL cases, the guy's ethnicity had NOTHING to do with it!

So far as porn goes, it indeed seems a given that virtually ALL the black guys depicted in the photos/vids are pretty well hung; seeing a black guy in M2M porn with an "average"-sized dick seems to be something not often seen.

But, again, it's just as you say:

"A COCK is a COCK", period.................

 

If you consider that a lot of guys are looking for a BBC - and they seem to still be in very high demand - then you might be lucky to find one that no one is using but while you're searching for one, think about all the other cocks you're passing up on... and I have never seen the sense in that and more so when you have so many men who'd give their left leg to suck a guy off or to take a hard on in the ass but when you ask them why they've not done it yet, the reason is almost always, "Can't find a guy..." and, welp, if it's BBC you want, no wonder you're not finding a guy since, again, those dudes are pretty busy.

My protege, after all the years I've been mentoring him, still sends me pics of BBC and asks me which ones I prefer or would I let the guy with a horse leg dangling fuck me or would I just suck him off and other such questions and like I'm a size queen or I like big dicks and when I don't know how many times I've told him that the size of the dick means nothing to me. If the guys can pass my three requirements, we can have sex but if he can't pass any single one of them, then it's no deal and especially if he's my idea of an asshole.

Some guys with the horse legs think that guys with smaller cocks have to worship them and... I'll be damned. I've had bigger. I grew up being fucked by "big dicks" and sucking them off. So forgive me if I fail to see what's so fascinating about them that I'd pass on the guy with only five inches - but he's got the desire to dive on in.

 

KD23:

You brought up a good point; all those guys enamored with BBC letting all other cocks go past him, cocks that EASILY could satisfy, really need to get a grip on reality.

Personally, I cannot fathom WHY a cock of a certain color is more of a turn-on than another.

Is it "mystique"?

Is it "the thrill of the exotic"?

Beats the hell out of me, why gay/bi guys go apeshit for a BLACK cock, while virtually ignoring all others......just does not make a bit of fucking sense........

 

Mystique, the thrill of the exotic, forbidden fruit, different but not really the same, stereotypes that have some basis in truth, and porn has always elevated big dicks over all others and when big-dicked Black and Hispanic men made the foray into mainstream porn - and seen demolishing white pussies and ripping white gay twinks a new asshole as well as choking and gagging all kinds of cocksuckers, well, I guess everyone pretty much got on the bandwagon and some guys are actually proud of the fact that they're size queens. I'm more... practical than that. It works. It's clean. I get to play with it. Admittedly, the color contrast of my dark skin against a white person's skin is intoxicating and it's always fun to not stay just with your own kind.

Have you ever seen "Mandingo" with Ken Norton, Jr.? If you haven't you need to see it and maybe it'll explain this situation a bit better...

 

KD23:

I certainly agree; the contrast of dark skin against white IS indeed intoxicating; I've always gotten off big time, seeing pics/vids showing a dark-skinned cock burrowed deep between a set of round, meaty, white ass mounds!

Maybe guys looking to get butt slammed by a BBC are anticipating the ecstacy of such a huge cock pounding the hell out of their prostates, sending them into another realm, another dimension, of an out-of-this-world, explosive, nut-busting orgasm.

Then again, wouldn't a BWC do EXACTLY the SAME thing?

And, to say that porn producers MORE than showcase and promote mule-hung Black, Hispanic, and Middle-Eastern guys is indeed a gross understatement.

 

Of course, a BWC or, really, any BC would do the exact same thing... or a 6" could do it since being able to bitch-slap a guy's prostate depends on the angle taken and position. The question that I would ask guys is - again - why hang all of your M2M hopes on getting a big dick to play with when there are a fuck-ton of other dicks to be had? So, when the bottom and sub-bottom community starts asking where all the tops are, are they really asking, "Where are all of the big-dicked tops?" because, again, there are a fuck-ton of tops who might not be hung like an elephant, but they know how to bring the noise just the same.

Now, I knew some guys with stupidly big dicks who made the hard decision to start having sex with guys because girls would take one look at all that dick hanging down - and he's not even hard - and let him know that, uh-uh, you ain't wrecking my shit with that motherfucker. They'd go looking for guys who, duh, were looking for a monster-sized dick that could and would destroy their hole and give them the brutal anal beatdown they desired... and some wound up having to undergo surgery to fix what the big-dicked guy destroyed and at least one guy that "everyone" knew got totally destroyed was last seen wearing the bag.

The problem isn't that guys have huge dicks; the problem is what's going on in their head because they do have a huge dick. In my youth, I ran into many a guy who was hung but used their endowment like a weapon and, at least for me, making the sex quite unpleasant and I had to either ask some guys to stop... or I had to make them stop because while there is a thin line between pleasure and pain, I don't know about anyone else but I'd rather not be on the pain side of that thin line. Those are the moments when you're being pounded by Mr. Big Dick and asking yourself, "Why did I think this was a good idea and was going to be a fun thing to do?"

The thing that used to crack me up would be negotiating with a guy who had a huge dick and he's sending me pics of it and like seeing how big he is was going to make me drop everything and do whatever he asked of me so I could get it and... oh, fuck, no.

I sometimes think that the men who are losing their shit over wanting to have a big dick of any kind (1) have never had any sized dick before and (2) have no idea of what it really takes to get 10" of dick buried in their backside and (3) might be unaware that a lot of the men who get traumatized by M2M sex their first time got that way because they were with someone with a huge dick. Sheesh... the things you learn over the decades...

 

KD23:

As always, an excellent, in-depth response, providing a LOT of "food for thought".

Yeah, I CAN easily see some egotistical guys (regardless of orientation) thinking that they are the "Lord of Creation" simply because they pack one helluva python between their legs (the term "dick head" would seem to come into play, here!)

Again, for a guy just really getting into M2M sex, it would seem to me that ANY dick (regardless of color or size) is going to be a major turn-on for him, especially if he's been denied dick for just about forever)

My personal advice to these guys would be:

"Hey, man, a DICK is a DICK......don't pass up the chance to get some DICK, ANY dick, if you've got the chance!"

Then again, to each his own, I guess...........

 

I tell guys that all of the time: If you have the chance to get some, then get some! Don't be stupid or careless about it but you're gonna learn not to let opportunities pass you by - and now is as good of a time to learn this lesson so don't let this get past you. And, oh, yeah - make it easy on yourself to get some, not harder. If you're married, well, you have some decisions to make: Suppress the desires and feelings you have for cock, ask your wife for permission to get some cock, or cheat on her and, hopefully, she won't ever find out that you did.

These are not easy decisions to make... but know that a lot of men do make them one way or the other.

I keep bringing this up, but I remember when my protege asked me how I managed to get so much dick and I told him the truth: I made it easy for guys to give it to me and I rarely said no. I reminded him that unlike him, I started when I was quite young (he had his first dick encounter when he was 38) so I went out of my way to get as much dick as I could and from anyone I could get it from. I came across many a guy who wanted to suck me off and... I was happy to let them do it and even managed to return the favor lots of times.

I wasn't stupid or careless about it but dick was dick; big, small, white, black, young like me, older and older and I learned that if you don't go after it - and allow guys to approach you - then you're not getting any dick; if you're overly picky about it, you probably won't see a lot of action, if any. It's prudent to be careful but you can't be afraid. I might not be willing or ready to fuck but I'm always down and ready to suck a dick and swallow some cum... because life really is too short and he who hesitates is lost.

 

KD23:

I guess what you are really saying is "seize the opportunity" while the getting is good! (makes good sense to me!)

Too, recall the old saying: "beggars can't be choosers".

"DICK is DICK".

Yeah, you and I BOTH know that to be fact, but, to those misguided guys only enamored with monstrous trouser pythons (of any color), or humongous BBC, are indeed only fooling themselves.

As you and I have both discussed in the past, too many gay/bi guys see what is presented them in porn and take it as REALITY.....and, in many cases, the "reality" is not conducive to them regarding COCK as COCK, and just going on from there.......

 

In all honesty, beggars have to be choosers in this because you really don't want to jump into bed with just anyone - there are men out there that other men should just avoid like the plague. You pick and choose your guy and the moment and, yes, carpe occasionem. Yes, sir - I slept with a lot of men and I chose many of them and chose to accept their invitation to have sex if I liked what was being offered.

Porn. Sheesh. Most of it is laughable as they try to imitate "real life" situations. Could it happen like that? It's possible but not likely unless there's some role playing going on and... I've never had the patience for that. Is my lover going to have a dick so long he trips over it if he doesn't tie it around his waist? Not very likely. The top/bottom dynamic is played ad nauseum in gay porn and you rarely see guys who are versatile, and you rarely see a guy get fucked... then gets up so he can fuck the guy who fucked him. And he sure as fuck isn't going to be trying to shove all of that dick down my throat and I really can't imagine why anyone would let such a hung guy even try that but, as you said, to each his own. If it floats your boat, then happy sailing!

 

KD23:

Man, it was NOTHING short of FRUSTRATING when you'd see two hot guys going at it hot and heavy, and the HOTTEST of the two either just BARELY sucks the other guy's dick (for maybe 30 seconds) before he fucks him, or doesn't even touch his shaft; too many vids had the HOTTEST guy the TOP.....you wanted to see his hairy butt slammed and slammed HARD by the "designated" bottom!

And, talk about stereotypes/cliched, M/M spanking porn is, for the most part, laughable; ALMOST all the scenarios have an older "daddy" type spanking a twink over his knee, or, at least, a younger, good-looking guy guy with a more masculine rump.

You'd LOVE to see the "daddy" drop his pants and go over the knees of the young guy and REALLY get his hairy butt toasted!

There used to be, years ago, a couple of REALLY hot M/M spanking sites where it was all "daddy next door"/daddy bear-types blistering the hell out of each other's big hairy butts, and NO TWINKS in sight!

Sadly, those sites are now long gone.

Interracial M/M porn, in general, almost always has the BLACK guy the TOP, and the WHITE guy the bottom; there ARE EXCEPTIONS, of course, where a hung white top plows the meaty butt of a black guy.

Funny, over 40 years ago, the first (interracial) M/M gay vid I saw in an adult book store booth in New York was "White Man's Cock-Black Man's Ass"; that HUGE white cock was TAILOR MADE to plow that round, meaty black ass, trust me!

Thankfully, I never took porn for "reality"; personally, I always thought that most M/M porn is but an exaggeration of what REALLY is, and let it go at that.

Here is where things get tricky; far too many guys, living in a fantasy world, see M/M porn and think it is ALL on the level.......porn vid creators MORE than crank out the "fantasy" aspect of it all, but, of course, you and I BOTH are well aware of this.........

 

Q:

What section of Disneyland/Disneyworld recalls what is most often promoted in BBC porn?

A:

"FANTASYLAND"!

And, for those males who believe they are too small in the dick department, perhaps they should adopt "It's A Small World After All" as their official theme song(!!)

 

I'm sure the guys with small dicks aren't finding that joke funny. I get what porn is supposed to be; I get that some guys watch it and say, "Hey... I wanna try/do that!" I get that some guys try it and like it and it becomes their way of getting some dick. I also get that there are guys who do not want to have sex with someone who's enamored of porn (and I'm one of them) because we're gonna wind up having sex the way they want to and not necessarily the way we'd want to.

Try giving my dick a token sucking before even thinking you're going to slam your dick into me... and find out what happens. If you're not a cocksucker, don't even bother talking to me. You wanna play top and bottom games? Go find someone else to play them because I like to fuck guys in the ass, too; I love having my dick sucked and I seriously love cumming in your mouth - homey don't play that facial shit because for decades, I will never do something to someone that I wouldn't want done to me so if you think you're gonna do a porn-style money shot in my face, I hope you have good insurance. But that's me and this is why every slinging dick has to find out what they like, what they don't like, what they will and won't do and establish a line that they will never, ever cross for anyone or anything.

 

KD23:

Over the years, would you sat that you've had more "straight" guys come back for dick/ass on a regular basis (and who find themselves hooked), than those who did it once, but are so wracked by guilt and stigmas that they never go for "another round" with a male?

Just wondering............