just to get a background about me i'm in my 1st year of SSW and i work with handicapped children. So please don't take what i'm going to say the wrong way.. This chapter was about marriage: this is a statement someone made that struck me Every human being should be presumed to have these rights unless someone can show an almost certain probability of disastrous consequences if he excerises them. If this becomes the *test* it should apply to retarded alike. An even more fundamental legal principle which also demands a revision of the legal approach toward the mentally disabled is that of the individulization... There appears to be little legal justification for laws now on books which deny persons with mental disabilities an entire set of rights on one ominous finding of "incompetency" or mental retardation. What may be said of some does not apply to all. "Retarded people like all people" ( i like how they worded that ) ??? vary enormously in talent, aptitude, personality, achievement, and temperment. The law at present has no scientific or other basis on which to presume that any mentally retarded individual cannot do any or all things well. Each persons capacities must be judged individully before HE/SHE can be DENIED rights of citizenship or HUMANITY.. What the heck is the world coming down too? Aren't handicapped people HUMANS too??? blergh? (speechless) what are your opinions??? sorry that was so long PG
that is a really really hard hard one to go into.... the only solution I can think of is to treat each person as an individual and to deal with each situation as it arises... urgh...my brain is pinging in all the possible directions that the different sides of this argument could take and it just hurts!
i know we are all human and if they pick from a hat and just say um you can't marry or your are too stupid .. its like murder!!! but you have to treat eachother equally!!!! PG
Before I started working with drug addicts I worked for many years with mentally challenged adults. I have known several who got married and lived productive lives. Some had children and others did not. Some of them needed assistance to live independently. Others lived on their own and did quit well. I don't think any human being should be denied the right to marry whoever it is they choose to marry. Some adults with challenges may need assistance to live with their partner, but give them the assistance, don't deny them the right to marry. I think I question the motives sometimes of adults who do not have mental challenges when they marry severly delayed adults. But it's not my decision. As long as no one is being harmed by the relationship, them let them do it. That's the key, Is someone going to be harmed. Kathi
I didnt know "retarded" was being used in the medical community anymore. My grandmother has a mentally disabled adult sister-Ann. She is child-like in cognitive functioning and in how she acts. My g'ma and her sisters have always taken care of her, til their health got too bad to do it. While she was living with and dependent on my grandma, she, as her adult guardian, had the right and the responsibility to be a part of decision making on many things. Ann couldnt be allowed to decide if she was going to take her medication or not, because she would choose not to and have seizures. She generally did not make her own health care decisions. G'ma had to watch what Ann ate, because if left to her own choices, she would only eat junk food. If she had decided she wanted to get married, if it were to a person who was able to care for her and all, I suppose that would be okay. But if it were to be to another disabled person, and they were to want to live with g'ma, and maybe even have a child, g'ma would have the right to say "no", you can't marry someone and make me responsible for him and a child too. As the step-mom to an autistic child with a low IQ (as well as it can be measured in autistic individuals) I'll share how I feel about it. It probably won't be popular though. Chances are high that he will not be able to live completely independently when he is an adult. If he can live in a home for people with disabilities where there is supervision and he wanted to live there, that would be fine. In this state, people with disabilities are encouraged to work in programs where they have a person who is employed by the state who is present for safety reasons. They get a paycheck, which reduces the amount of SS income, but gives them some productivity. The state employee can provide transporation too. They also take them on recreational trips. If he wanted to marry someone and they could live with or without supervision, then I guess that would be okay, but I would not want him to get married and reproduce if it would require me to take care of his wife and child too. I dont think the state should have the right to say that someone cant get married because they have mental disabilities, but the person who is their guardian should have some say if they are going to support and care for the person.
This isn't really a Parenting Issue. I will move it to Family Matters, this seems to be where it may fit the best.
