20 year old having a non-sexual relationship with a 14 year old.

Man, she's a kid, a child. Your feelings aren't "wrong" but it would be wrong to pursue this relationship anymore. You obviously don't seem to know this. There are millions of women your age out there, there's no reason for you to be leading this child on.

I mean this nicely- Grow up, be a man, and date a woman. Let the kid go about her own life and don't lead her on. You mentioned you broke up with a 19 year old. Because this girl didn't like it? That means she thinks you're hers, and it shows that you have intent to be hers.

Seriously, let it go and move on. I can't believe this child's father has allowed this. Even though it may seem innocent, you're an adult and she's a child.

 

op>wrong...bordering on criminally wrong...stop being an idiot..YOU are the one that needs to grow up here and walk away..before they carry you away

 

you are wasting this girls time. let her experience her childhood without her having to feel obligated to you. this is not fair what you're doing to her, especially since you are sleeping with other women

 

I was pretty good friends with a 19 year old girl when I was 12 but in your case the physical shit (hands, kissing potentially), just presents itself as a slippery slope to me, anyway

 

I wish I had a better answer than "that's fucked up."


But I really don't.


Sorry, that's fucked up.

 

yeah man wtf? only a loser would date a girl who is 14 when he is 21. a guy who is 21 should not even go below 18 in my opinion. I think the limit should be a 3 year gap. so a 20 yearold with a 17 yearold should be fine.

 

What could you possibly have in common with a 14 year old girl? this is just wrong man.

 

Get out more.
And the same oppinion
Just leave it alone mannn.

 

Nope, he'll be with this thread to the bitter end.

It's funny I ran across this thread because I was in the 'Most Memorable Moments' thread and almost listed Sininabin and his 'relationship' posts as one of them. I guess he's still around. Never fully figured out if he was troll or just one fucked up dude.

 

If I had a 14 year old daughter holding hands with a 20 year old man I'd take that motherfucker for a real scenic ride. Explain a few things to him, in a manner of speaking.

Now I'm just about as liberal minded as it gets, but no, this is unacceptable.

 

I usually say age doesn't matter. But, it comes to someone under 16 it does. I definitely wouldn't let my 14 year old daughter date a 20yr old.

 

I was in a similar situation with age recently (although it was not illegal). I am 19 and she was 25. One of the things that would stick in my mind is. "By the time I am the age that she is now (25) She will be 31.

When this girl is 20, OP will be what? 27? 26?

Does not sound so bad based on that outlook. But you really have to remember that people who are 20 have different goals and beliefs that people who are 27. At that time you might be ready to settle down (do not say you will not be, because you are not a time traveler nor a "future seerer") And she probably will not be. Meaning that if you actually want to date this girl and have it not have it blow up in your face, then you are going to have to wait 4 years before it is legal to have a sexual relationship. And it will be 10 or 12 years before she starts to be looking for the same type of relationship that you would be looking for at 30.

The odds, numbers, and world simply is against you.

If she is really "the one" then by all means, keep it fun and legal. Because life can actually work out in situations like this. My parents met when my mother was 25 and my dad was 40. 15 years difference. So if you can make it with her until you are able to have a real relationship with her then great. Maybe you sit down with her parents, without her even, in case 14 year old drama starts, and explain YOUR situation. You know it is not legal, the situation is clearly working against your personal ethics (else why post here). You have not had any form of sex with her. Etc. Show her parents that you are very aware of the entire situation, and even if they are not swayed in to how good your intentions really are, you will at least have shown them you are up front, and not an idiot. Which might make them feel a little easier about their daughter hanging around you.

If not, then I really think it would be easier on everyone if you were not "dating". I guarantee her parents will breath a sigh of relief.

 

That's not similar at all. A 14 year old is a child.

 

I meant it is similar in terms of the 6 year difference. The point I was making was that of a future with the two of them. I felt it was a different approach then the standard response in this thread thus far. I made the same point as you (in that I did not that they should continue being together), I just addressed it while trying to be fairly neutral to the morality of it. Because I can not speak for anothers morality in any other sense then how it relates to mine.

Where as you simply stated the appropriate response is violence and intimidation. (At least for you it seems to be)

 

Doomed relationship. Girls who spend too much of their younger years tied down with one guy they end up getting all their freak out at once once they realize there is an entire world of experiance out they that they've effectivly been blocked off from.

More often than not that's the dynamic for teen girls (hardly in this case... this is cradle robbing) who are in that girls situation. And it's usually ugly when it happens.

there are a million reasons why this is wrong. A mans sex drive shouldn't alter a fucking childs development. It's perverted and demented. Even with the best of intentions.

 

I agree. Which is why my first post above advocated for waiting another 4 years before anything sexual happens between them.

 

yeah, that'll work. People are great at facing down years of sexual tension.

 

I vote for Sam's introductory scenic tour.

 

blahhh
I rather keep my 2cents in my pocket than to throw them on this topic.