2 line poem challenge

lots of presents large and small
more than enough for one and all

but what about those who will have no Christmas cheer

 

but what about those who will have no Christmas cheer
the least they can do is bring over beer?


i deamed last nite that i was an elf

 

i dreamed last night that I was an elf
having rather too much of a good time with myself

when all at once I heard a sound

 

I dreamed last nite that I was an elf
had the best time of my life if I say so myself

Pretty little packages up under the tree......

 

i deamed last nite that i was an elf
As Santa preped to fly there stood myself

Telling him "Remember, no cookies in Colorado or Washington!"

 

Nothing is ever quite what it seems.
This reality could be a simulation, it all could be a dream.

 

Telling him "Remember, no cookies in Colorado or Washington!"
__________________
"it's really best to wait until you've gone

a little bit further north to the snow covered states"

 

a little bit further north to the snow covered states"
but the very yummiest I'll pack a few home to where the mrs awaits

i'm sure Mrs Santa will love these lovely cookies

 

i'm sure Mrs Santa will love these lovely cookies
eating and placing a bet with some bookies

its christmas eve and santa is drunk

 

it's christmas eve and santa is drunk
and behaving like a first class punk

"oh santa why do you have to be such a twat"

 

Oh santa why do you have to be such a twat
Think christmas '97, remember that?

I asked for a cat and you gave me a hat!

 

I asked for a cat, and you have me a hat,
I asked for a hat, and you gave me a cat.

What's next on your list of screw-ups this year?

 

What's next on your list of screw-ups this year?
Firing the elves and eating the deer?

Santa, oh Santa, with fur trimmed suit

 

Santa, oh Santa, with fur trimmed suit
Stuffing our stockings with yuletide loot

There by the fireplace, resting your sack

 

I Would Be Most Appreciative If You Would Give My Porn Collection Back ....

Tit Appears This Will Never Ever Eventuate, So....



Cheers Glen.

 

Tit Appears This Will Never Ever Eventuate,
So.... do, on my cookies please mast... icate.

On donner, on dasher, on rudolph, and nigel

 

On donner, on dasher, on rudolph, and nigel
I pushed, each one of them off a cliff near Tintagel - leave me on a word like that again and you'll be next!


Edit: Changed the start line to keep with the christmas spirit
Edit Edit: Too late, back to normal
The homeless man smiled as he stared at his lunch

 

On donner, on dasher, on rudolph, and nigel
is rhyming with that shit too much of a ride y'all?

Then laying a finger aside of his nose

 

The homeless man smiled as he stared at his lunch
a cracker, a cork, and some egg-nog-spiked punch

Then laying a finger aside of his nose

 

Then laying a finger aside of his nose
He blew out of the other, lots of boogers expose...d

The salmon sang a most beautiful song