100 things to do with squirrels

Teach them to climb trees and smoke grass

 

smuggle them into the White House.

 

Make them listen to the Electric Prunes

 

makes them clean bongs..

 

Get him really drunk and when he passes out take a picture of him with his hand in the chipmunk's pants.

 

let them defrost the freezer..

 

Wax the floor and cover his feet with duct tape.

 

take them for walks in the park..

 

feed them acorns

 

Hypnotize them into thinking they're dogs and laugh when the cat kicks his ass.

 

paint them purple...

 

send them UPS to bedlam!

 

breed them..

 

Marinate them overnight in a sweet currie/sugarsaute them in extra virgin olive oil with diced shallots and garlic, cilantro, oregano, snow peas, and a dash of port.

 

teach them leetspeek

 

send them to my mothers house for a party..

 

perform plastic surgery on them to give them the likeness of prism.

 

make them clean the fish tank..

 

give them cigarette butts to eat ... at least that's what they do on my campus

 

get them stoned at times..