100 things to do with squirrels

teach them to clean the house, cook, feed you, and fetch the remote

 

one word, sex

 

Teach them the chicken dance

 

juggling.

 

use them as a mop

 

Juggaloing

 

make em into salt and pepper shakers.

 

tie little bombs to their bellies and send them on suicide bombing missions

 

Teach the other Squirrels to wage a war on terrorism

 

hypnotise them and make em think they are chickens

 

make miniature F-14s and institute a top-nut program to train squirrels to fly them

 

train them to play chess

 

Kick them in the pink bits

 

use them as toilet paper

 

Dip them in Praise creamy mayonaise

 

Throw 'em on the barbie (as in b-b-q)

 

make em United Nations delegates

 

make them act in porn movies

 

stuff em in Ash's dresser drawers and watch him be surprised when they pop out!!!!

 

build a mini monastery and dress them up as monks