"Top 10 Reasons NOT to HS" (it's satire and very funny!)

I thought all of you would LOVE this; it's great!

Ten Reasons Not to Homeschool

January 12, 1995

Why send your kids to public schools rather than homeschool.
Here are ten good reasons:

10. Skill development: Government schools do a great job of teaching children to sit down and shut up while the teacher engages in crowd control and mindless administrative duties. The ability to put one's mind on hold, sit there and do nothing is a skill that will be in high demand in the competitive marketplace of the future.

9. Lack of ability: I couldn't teach my own child - I don't know how. After all, anything meaningful in life can only be taught by those properly trained and certified to do so.

8. Financial aspects: We can't financially afford to homeschool. Without the school based health clinics, how could we afford to keep our children supplied with condoms and birth control.

7. Goals 2000: I want my children to learn all the correct stuff. Given how fast history changes, I want to be sure they are up on the most recent version.

6. Scheduling benefits: Staying on the same schedule as everybody else has its benefits. That way, when we go to Orlando, we can make sure that we spend our time waiting in lines rather than wasting it on all those rides and attractions.

5. Close friendships: I like the fact that my children are spending so much of their time with people not in their family. I would much rather my children's closest friendships be outside the family rather than within.

4. Separation of church and state: As long as we keep church and state separate, then the more time I can keep my kids under the control of the state, the less time they can possible be under the harmful influence of the church.

3. Socialization: What possible better way could there be to give your children the social skills they will need as adults than to stick them with children their own age all day. Besides, the best influence on your child is the one randomly assigned to the seat behind him or her in home room.

2. Class size: Learning can't occur in groups of less than twenty students. There is nothing quite like being lock-stepped through material with thirty other students to really develop within a person that true love for learning.

1. Class pace: I want my child to know how to learn at the proper pace. If a child can't keep up with the class, then it serves that child right to be left behind in the dust. If the child is learning too fast, then he or she needs to learn to slow down. And besides, what gives any child the right to assume that he or she can learn things he or she wants to learn rather than what the Federal Government decides should be taught for any given grade level. Anything learned at the wrong time might just as well be left unlearned

 

are you sure this is satire?

 

These were a little too Right Wing for me. Sounds like the Bible Banger Home Schoolers in my area, whose girls have to wear dresses ALL the time, aren't allowed to cut their hair, and have their husbands picked out by dad and the "church" by the time they are 15.

The home schooling attitues I like are a little more open minded than this.

JMO.

 

Not every Christian homeschooler is like that.

Whatever, I enjoyed it at least.

 

I enjoyed it!

I don't understand what is right wing about not wanting to wait in lines. I love homeschooling because being on a "normal" schedule doesn't work for me.

 

5. Close friendships: I like the fact that my children are spending so much of their time with people not in their family. I would much rather my children's closest friendships be outside the family rather than within.

developing close relationships with ppl outside of your family is important and it's not like you never see your family at public school.

 

Hehe...I remember in high school (I went to a very small high school, graduated in a class of 60 kids), my favorite classes were the ones with about 4 or 5 kids. My English class senior year had 4 kids first semester and 2 second (we were advanced English and the two who left went to take the second semester college English course). I had a lot of fun and got to know the teachers much better because it was a much more intimate environment. I can say one thing, though, if I had the option of sending my kids to the HS I came from or homeschooling, I'd definitely homeschool.

 

Those do not seem like satire to me...... But with how fucked up the world is now I think if you have the means to do it,HOME SCHOOLING will result in better results!!