Lesbians, would you date a bisexual girl?

Lesbians hating on bi girls equal to racism? Lol.

Your friend may wish for a piece of cake and yeah she might want to eat it too, but please, spare the political mumbo jumbo, if it's not right for a certain person then so be it. Deal with it.

When you try and confine a sexuality to what you think the standard of moral is then you're doing just that. You are judging everyone to live by the same values and morals which you are and clearly this isnt the standard everyone lives. We are all different. And yes, even lesbians differ in a variety of way, just in case you didn't know.

~~~~

I had to have a laugh at my previous answers from a couple of years ago and just how much my mentality has changed.

I still fear the unknown of who's been there, but if the girl is seriously into me then I'm all for it. But I ain't sharing between sexes. They can have me for as long as they need, be it one night, a week.. months.. but once they start having a sexual affair with a guy again, I'm outties.

 

Huh. Strange. I don't remember hating on anyone's dating preferences. Please do point out where I indicated so. Because as far as I'm concerned, I could care less if someone dates an oompa loompa. If you don't want to date bisexual girls, that's your prerogative.

However, I do have a problem with people hating on people for how they're born. And please, I will shove political mumbo jumbo into people's faces if I think it's right. Lesbians hating on bi girls equal to racism? Yes. Just as bad as straight people being disgusted at lesbians. I don't know of any lesbian who doesn't have a problem with straight people hating on her for her sexual preferences. But of course, who knows? You might be the first I meet to be fine with it.

If you don't want to date bisexual girls, fine. If you want to identify yourself as asexual and pansexual at the same time, I will find it odd, but I honestly won't care. However, if you hate bi girls because they're attracted to both men and women, then I will be the first to tell you to shove it.

We may all have different standards of morality, but the minute our decisions start hurting others purposefully and unnecessarily, then judgment should be expected.

 

I don't see where I told you that you were hating on dating preferences. I don't see that at all.

What I do see is me basically telling you, in regards to your friend, that tto each their own.

Now you can tell me to "shove it" for something I didn't say, nor suggest, nor do I even got into the scenario of what you are saying, but what I will tell you again is, to each their own. There's nothing wrong with a lesbian who is shy of bisexuals or has a distaste for them. That's individual preference and you are no one to say otherwise.

Sorry you feel hard done by and stuff, but what you think is "purposeful hate" might just be an individual's preference. That's your burden to swallow.

 

As long as shes dating me idgf who she slept with in the past. We all have pasts. Its stupid to judge someone on it. Point is to not bring that in the relationship and make it a present. If it is. Atleast talk about it and come to a mutual agreement. The ability to be open and honest with your feelings is whats important. And relationships are work. You either work at it or choose to move on. Bi or lez. Doesnt matter.

 

I wouldn't say that it's completely out of the question, but I'd rather not and I never have. There's true bisexuals out there but I feel like (around here) girls just claim that they're bisexual because they're tired of having their heart broken by men. So, in theory they believe that dating women will solve that. Which is pretty fucking stupid, but that's females for you.

I usually refer to bisexuals as pretend lesbians... I'll sleep with them, that's all the further it's ever gone though.

 

I feel like there's this horrible stereotype/misconception that all Bi-girls/pan-girls are promiscuos which certainly isn't the case. And in fact this attitude seems even more prevalent with lesbian women than it does with men. To be honest I've had the worst time engaging in the lgbt community specifically because of the harsh and exclusionary attitude I've been met with by lesbians and other gay women. There's always been this feeling of 'what am I doing wrong?' whenever I interact with a woman I find attractive and wish to date ( and yes I do mean 'date' as in potentially start a relationship ). I've only dated one woman who was willing to give me a chance but she scared me off by wanting to hold hands by the second date (something I am uncomfortable doing PERIOD). It felt like she wanted to call me her girlfriend after only talking and being with me two times and it really made me nervous as I prefer to take things slow. And yes I've had the same reaction when dating men. Personally I identify as pansexual as when I'm attracted to someone I'm attracted to them regardless of what's in their pants. Hell if/when I get in there then it's just that much more fun of a surprise.

I've tried/wanted/actively pursued dating other women for YEARS without success because they learn of my sexuality and react poorly to it. I have a particularly vehement argument that reminded me of bigotted anti-gay rhetoric saved on my phone from a woman who said that labeling myself as 'pansexual' and saying I was interested in dating women was 'lying and misinforming' saying that 'why don't we just call pedophiles a sexuality now?' and the like to me when I disagreed.

This attitude of 'I would never/could never' date a bisexual woman is hurtful and harmful. It reminds me that my only potential options are men because women who like other women don't find me suitable. I understand bad dating situations, I've been cheated on, lied to, and manipulated in the past. Hell a trans guy I dated up and stopped talking to me out of the blue just when I thought things were really getting good.

While I understand the attitude having run into girls who put 'bisexual' on their profile only to turn around and say they don't date girls, I don't let those past experiences negatively effect potential future encounters. What I DO keep in mind because it's shattered my confidence and seriously hurt my feelings is the vehement reaction I've recieved on the behalf of lesbians who either decide I don't look/act lesbian enough (which has happened and which I really don't get) or because of my sexuality don't give me the time of day/are outright rude to me. Maybe the reason bi-girls don't seem serious about dating lesbian women is because their own interactions have been negative in the past and so (like I've thought at times) they believe men really are their only choice?

I would date another bi-girl and like every date I'd take it seriously and hope she did too. Just as I would take any date with a lesbian woman seriously. I'm not out to sleep around, I don't want to. And the bi-girls I'm friends with aren't either (not that there's anything wrong with just wanting to sleep around but I'm trying to make a point here). Treating me and other bi/pan girls with the attitude of 'no-way she'll just leave me for a guy' is like a self-fulfilling policy you're treating them as if that's the inevitability and yes we pick up on it and get discouraged.

If you're in a realtionship with a girl do you think about being with other girls? Or just the one you're with? I know that when I'm with somebody, regardless of who they are, I'm thinking about them. And only them. I recognize that they're gender is apart of them and important and thus important to me but it's just not something that cues into my initial attraction. It's a lot like the filling in a cake you can't really tell what it is just by looking at the cake's outsides but when you bite into it and invest yourself in eating it you're so happy it's there and it's apart of the whole cake-eating experience. I would be happy with almost any filling but I'm eating this one and I love it and I'm not going to stop eating it just because somebody offers me a different cake with another filling (no matter how appetising it seems) because I have this cake with this filling.

I guess what I'm saying is I don't find the responses here surprising. I already knew most lesbian women would say 'no' because they have an idea of who bi/pan girls are in their head. I just find it disappointing because it reminds me that even if I fall in love with a woman she won't want me because I'm never going to be lesbian enough for her.

 

I would date a BI girl.

 

I agree with puppylove. She makes a lot of sense.

A bi friend of mine once had her heart broken horribly by a lesbian who she thought was the one because the lesbian girl couldn't stop worrying about her bi-ness. These two could have been happily married by now with an amazing life if she had been able to put aside her fears and prejudices about bi girls.

I personally find both sexes (and everything in between) very attractive, but don't consider myself bi because I do prefer relationships with guys and I know if I told someone I was bi because I sometimes like sex with women they would probably think I was full of shit.

 

It's unlikely that I'll fall for a bi girl. The idea that even though they can love women, that lesbians have all this that they could offer etc etc, but the fact that they also like cock is what turns me off. I'm not attracted to guys, and never will be. I have a few friends that are bi, and I always feel distant around them when they talk about how hot guys are. A bi girl leaving a lesbian for a man is like betrayal (that's the closest thing I can describe it as). It's like they're going to the 'other' side that's accepted by hetero-normative society. They wouldn't have to deal with homophobic slurs, or having strangers questioning/not understanding their relationship and feeling uncomfortable. I get that some countries are becoming more accepting of the gay community, but a lot of it is still conservative. Some people will say that a bi girl leaving a lesbian for a man is no different than if she were to leave her with another woman, is wrong.

There are things that a lesbian could never offer to a bi girl that a guy could. It's different, and only gays/lesbians would understand what I'm talking about here. A bisexual reading this would never get it just by the very fact of their sexual orientation.

 

If they were attractive or had a nice personality then yeah, I would. Other than that, I don't know if I would. I'd prefer if they were just lesbian, to be honest.

 

Yep, same. And I'm not really sorry if that hurts anybody at all. That is just MY preference.

 

Best response in the whole thread.

 

I have always hated the discrimination that cis gendered lesbians had for trans lesbians and bisexual women. I boycotted the Michigan Womyn's Music Festival because of their barring of trans women.

I feel the same way about the anti- bi stance that so many lesbians espouse.

 

that reminds me of people years ago considering lesbians as ugly women or not "correctly" fucked women. i consider myself bisexual and my heart had never been broken till i met my first girlfriend. Anyway thank you so much for the respect and acceptance you show us

 

I'm actually dating a bisexual girl now and the only thing I wonder about is if I should use a dildo with jer or not.I'm actually her first girl experience ever so sometimes I wonder if she's missing that kind of penetration. She's never complained... so far its been all compliments lol but still I wonder about using a dildo or not!

 

I suggest asking her. I don't know about other bi/pan girls but for me penetration has NEVER worked. If she's into it then it's something you can do together. Bi-girls are just like other girls we can't read your mind and every one of us is different. But trust me, cocks are not magical things that control our brains like crack. I have never "missed" having dick in my life. I have missed being with someone who made me feel loved.

 

I guess it would be hypocritical of me to say no, when I identified as bisexual when I first started dating my girlfriend. I was too afraid to admit that I was a lesbian. It was more for everyone else, so I could say "Don't worry, I might still go back to men" which is stupid of me, and offensive towards actual bisexuals. I hate to perpetuate the belief that bisexual is just a step on the way to gay town.

However, I know myself and I know that I'm too insecure to be competing with other women and other men for my girlfriend's affections. I've been cheated on before. And my girlfriend has told me horror stories about almost every one of her exes cheating on her. Half of them left her for men. I don't think I could handle that. Again, I know it's wrong. But I'd rather refrain from entering into a relationship that I can't handle than to be inclusive and insecure the whole time. Sorry.

 

Would I? All of my girlfriends have been bi. Bi bitches are AMAZING at lesbian sex though lol

 

I wouldn't mind at all, provided that she'd been nothing but an incredible company all throughout the time we've spent together.

 

dating a bi woman wouldn't bother me.
If i have a strong connection and she's bi, that's fine with me