To be Cloven Before G*d and these Witnesses

I grew up at a time where/when same-sex marriage didn't exist. You didn't have to be a flower child who was shacking up with your 'old man' to commune as lovers at the time. Of course, maintaining two residences back then was less expensive than it would be now, but (all things being equal... whatever the heck that means) folks also earned less.
Where am I going with this?
There was an idealistic Spanish major I had met in college who was 7 years 8 months older than I back when I was a freshman. He lived with his dad and went to the same commuter college as I. Yeah... I lived with my parents. When he wasn't in class he would be found shopping for the cheapest cuts of meat at a local butcher or buying Colt 45 in the big bottle. He also toked weed and seemed more interested in getting high (or drunk) than he was in making out. He used the generic term 'getting buzzed'.
He would never disclose his sexuality to anyone and no one had ever asked me why I was 'hanging out' with this older guy with long hair who didn't drive. I was madly in love and could tell no one.
For many years he had pushed me away and even wrote a return to sender on the envelope of one of the letters I had written to him.
Then, one year, I had decided to see if I could get back in touch with him. I sent a letter to him c/o his father. The letter sat there for months and he had spotted it when he came to visit his father. He took me up on my offer to be a friend and he half-heartedly acknowledged the fact that we had parted ways at his will.
He never expressed any interest in being physical with me and I had never made the offer.
He is a retired Spanish teacher, living in Florida, and boasting about how cheap his rent is. He has one savings account (no checking account), drives a KIA that has sand on every surface inside, is probably 35 to 40 pounds overweight, and can't understand why I never eat bottom-feeders from the sea since I am not a declared vegetarian.
He is vigilant about protecting the integrity of his vision; wears trifocals and undergoes procedures to inhibit the effects of macular degeneration. Yet, he has sensory hearing deficit and when I had asked him about it he shrugged. He doesn't believe in audiology and thinks that the discipline is overrun with people who just want to sell hearing aids (which he would not wear). In restaurants he ignores waiters and gets angry that his order was not taken or he gets ticked off when someone is eating something that he didn't see on the menu because it was part of the verbal special of the day.
I am, of course, glad that I had never been asked to share this former boyfriend's life. He has turned into a very self-absorbed elitist and he continues to have tastes and opinions that he deems to be infinitely superior to those who stand on the opposite side of the court.
I choose my travel companions wisely and have learned that if I am uncomfortable with someone for more than one reason, then it is best to limit future contact.
My friends' list diminishes... and I still have yet to have my heart cloven before G*d and these witnesses.