Which commune is which?

so then, i have recently become pretty interested in the communal life. after a brief period of experience i have to say i've become enthralled with the possibilities.

where to start? what to do? where can i find more communities? and dare i say what is the answer? are there really as many communes as i hear there are? why are they all seperate? (but mostly just which communities are where and their history)

i just want to be able to see everyone together...

but anyway i'm sorry if this question has been asked before which i'm sure that it has. i'm tired and stoned and didn't feel like looking through the old posts in this forum anda more personal response might be more helpful if i can get one.

 

this site has alot of info http://directory.ic.org/

 

Seriously??

You are too tired and stoned (ie; lazy) to READ through posts, and you want people to take the time to answer you?

okay, here is an answer for you....

If you are the type of person who thinks its okay for you to be lazy and to get other people to do things for you because of it, most communes will kick you out on your ass within the week.

If they don't, within a few months of welcoming those like you, they will collapse and disappear.

 

:iagree:

Very well said.

 

maybe, i was tired from working all week in the commune that i was in. that was a little harsh. i asked for help, not condemnation. i just thought i would try and get a little personal advice before i went and looked through the forums. but if that is the attitude i'm going to encounter everywhere i go, then maybe i was better off where i was.

if you can't come from a place of understanding why people are lazy in the first place and helping them to solve their problems then it will collapse and disapear too. sometimes we have to brunt the weight of our brothers, while they learn to stand themselves. it's soooo worth it once they come around.

 

Harsh? Oh yeah, that was really harsh.

Come from a place of understanding why people are lazy???

I really don't care why you are too lazy to read through what has already been written.

 

haha. well people aren't just born lazy. that's for sure. it is usually as a result of circumstances and their past.

the point is responding to laziness with a waving finger doesn't work. did responding to hostility with more hostility ever work? no, you have to respond with love and caring.

 

I understand that it's scary to think about making a change and actually going out and metting new people, especially when it is in their own envirnoment such as an already established home or community. There are concerns from safety to music, from food music to gods and literally everything in between.

It's a big step, and yes, it would be nice if someone came and held each person's hand along the way when they choose to start this life.

What I don't get is why people expect it to happen...

If a place is well established and has everything set up with long term members, they may have time to do such a thing for every prospective members that comes along, but even then I doubt it, because there is ALWAYS things that need to be done yesterday and they always take precedence over everything (or the place collapses).

In the case of most start up places, there is an over-whelming amount of things that need to be done. Whether there are 2 people there or 12 people there, the amount of work that needs to be done today, doesn't change, it's a lot.

And here's the kicker.... All those scary thoughts about what could happen and who may be there and will you get along and such, have already been had, by the people who are already there. They wondered the same things, and then they got up and they went and found out if they liked it. If they didn't they left and found another one, or another path. What they didn't do, is expect someone else to repeat themselves over and over again just to satisfy their laziness.

There is an exception to all of this, there are places that will spend time 'courting' you and blowing smoke up your ass about how great it is... when one of them finds you, the best advice I can offer is, "don't drink the kool-aid"...




When the people there do get the time to sit down and share what they have been doing and what is going on and so forth

 

There are a lot of people on these forums who are living in just the sort of situation you want, and a lot of them have already posted about what they are doing. Do you know why they aren't here right now saying that they have just the place you want?

 

well, you shouldn't repeat yourself over and over to satisfy someone's laziness. but you should still provide to them the avenues needed to overcome their dillemas should they actually have a willingness to learn and help. but i guess that raises the question of where you draw the line, and why. for larger communities the line could be alot wider since they will have alot more slack, but in smaller newer communities i could understand why it would be more pressing to meet the immediate needs.

but anyway we could sit here and talk about things all day and accomplish nothing. i'd say that the reason those people aren't here in this thread is because this thread has so little significance that it amounts to nothing. i appreciate the input, but i was really just looking for maybe a little help and guidance as to how i could go about finding and contacting communities. spiralout had the right message, he seemed like a pretty nice dude last time i met him.

 

Why?

 

because it's the right thing to do. personally i don't much see the point in joining a commune if it is still governed by old-fashioned greed and ego.

 

So you see it as a choice between lazy people or greedy egotistical ones?

The right thing to do, is to let those who are too lazy to do for themselves, suffer the consequences of their own choices.

It really amazes me how people somehow think that just by wanting they should recieve... That others should do for them so they don't have to.

It isn't greed to say, don't expect others to do for you what you refuse to do for yourself.

 

i don't see anything as a choice between two types of people. people are people. i see it as ways of dealing with certain situations. but you can't just say something as broad as 'if they are lazy, let them suffer the consequences of their actions' because really it should be taken on a case-by-case basis.

wanting others to do for yourself isn't the right attitude at all, i agree. you should be willing to do it for yourself, and you also shouldn't expect anything from anyone else that you wouldn't also do yourself.

but above all, you yourself should be willing to help others. if that means that others are willing to do the same, then they are also willing to help you. not out of a need for a reward, or for benefit, but for love.

 

Keep at it, man. I've been hoping to find a commune for a long while; still poking around online and doing my research - finding one to click with my own ideals/needs is time-consuming, but better than wasting their time if I show up unprepared.

 

I can only say that I would never join a commune, or live with people who are lazy. I wouldn't be running around after them while they sit back and enjoy be served. I spent a few months at an eco village and it worked because everyone had the jobs they needed to do and everyone pulled there weight.

there are so any threads out there about different communes, just take a look. If you are bothered to keep coming back to this thread, even though it isn't want you wanted, then look for what is.

 

And there's the whole point Desos.

You say it's not about choosing between two differenet types, but that is where you are wrong.

The people who actually want to do this and actually want to work, do not want their efforts being sucked up by those who don't.

Those who need 'caring, love and understanding' in order to get them to work are most definitely willing to share with those who don't need that in order to do their share, but the reverse is NOT true.

Grim, the idea of;

There isn't a group out there that you need anymore preparation to join then just simply deciding you want to live this life and share it with others.

While you are 'preparing' (whatever that means), the people you will eventually decide to join, are most likely already working their asses off to make it work, and would really appreciate another set of hands.... TODAY....

 

and i wasn't saying that you should. but if it is within your capacity to do so then why not help those that need help and will actually put your help to good use? i said 'case-by-case basis.' i think that you guys are totally misunderstanding what i'm saying. i'm not saying that you should just work for lazy people who are lazy and want to continue to be lazy and will always be lazy.

if all that i wanted was to work hard for myself and be able to live with people i'd get a job and some roomates. obviously those people that are 'not willing to share' just need to be loved until they see the err of their ways. theyre the ones that need help really..

i don't view it as 'different types of people' i view it as my capacity and what i can do to help that is within my capacity. if a situation is beyond my capacity, then obviously it needs to be adressed to where it isn't having any kind of adverse consequences on the community.

 

No, you are just saying that we should put effort into convincing people they shouldn't be lazy.

And what I am saying is I would rather put my time and energy into doing things with people who don't need to be convinced that they should be
sharing in the work.

You keep talking about love... What type of love is it that would allow friends of yours to work to support a stranger who needs to be 'convinced' to do their share? To me, that is more of a slap in the face then love.

It's telling your friends that the work they do to support themselves isn't enough, that they have to work even harder to support someone who needs to be convinced to work.

The people that I choose to be around me, do thier share of what needs to be done, because it needs to be done and they like the results of it. I would never disrespect them by telling them they are going to have to support someone who thinks (for whatever reason) they shouldn't have to.

I guess it comes down to a difference of what type of people we each wish to have around ourselves... I want individuals who have pride in the choices they make, not those who want to be 'convinced' or led...

The idea of an IC (for me) isn't to support those who don't want to support themselves, it is for individuals to share work they all need done in order to have a happy balanced life.

 

well if you have the means to do so then i don't know why you wouldn't. because chances are the humans that aren't doing the things they need in community have already had their spirits damaged enough by the frail state of humanity. another rejection is just going to push them further away and damage them more.

this is the idea i have of an IC. a place free from the moral degredation and selfishness of the human spirit, and a return to normalcy. a place where you can belong. not just some people, but everyone. the time is now.

sure there are many, many, many complications along the way. but i don't think that it is an impossible goal.