What can I expect

Discussion in 'Women's Forum' started by Liver Steam, Jul 31, 2005.

  1. Liver Steam

    Liver Steam Member

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    My lovely girlfriend is 3 months pregnant. She had gotten pregnant before when she was 16 and I was 17. She decided we couldn't have a child then so she got an abortion. A decision she seems to regret. But now she preggers again and since we are older, living together on our own, and have some fianacial support from family we decided to start a family.

    Sorry for the long intro, heres my question: What can I expect living with a pregnant woman? According to my dad they get really horny and yell alot [​IMG]...but he's a drunk idiot.

    So can someone fill me in cuz I literally have no idea whats gonna happen.
     
  2. Liver Steam

    Liver Steam Member

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    Oh yeah she's already had some serious morning sickness, but seems to be over that now.
     
  3. RetroGroove_Grrl

    RetroGroove_Grrl I'm a big girl now

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    Expect anything!

    Its sweet that you are have asked though.

    Yeah, she could turn into a mad bitch, or be highly emotional, or flat or exuberent.... anything really, and she'll prolly just want you to be there for her
     
  4. forest420

    forest420 Senior Member

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    yea i dont know...she might be many different things...bitchy, hormonal, or just plain...fukin....emotional...i probably didnt help o well
     
  5. Maggie Sugar

    Maggie Sugar Senior Member

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    She'll be a pregnant womyn. Not all pregnant womyn act the same. Maybe being concerned about how the pregnancy will effect HER rather than how it will disrupt YOUR life might be a more empathic choice. What ever YOU are going through, it'll be 1,000 times rougher on her. She's the one with a small being growing inside her, and will have to care for it's every need forever. (Sorry, but your post appeared as if you were concerned about how the pregnancy would effect you, and that is really not the issue when a mother is pregnant.)

    Just an idea...........

    If you really have an interest on what your girlfriend is going to have to go through, and is going through now, there are plenty of good books and websites with good information.

    A Good Birth A Safe Birth by Diana Korte and Roberta Scaer give good info about pregnancy and birth

    Ina May's Guide to Childbirth Ina May Gaskin, also you can read Spiritual Midwivery by Ina May Gaskin

    The Pregnancy Book William and Martha Sears a good guide to pregnancy and how to keep healthy

    Mothering.com has good info on pregnancy

    I would avoid What to Expect......... series, the info is seriously outdated and there are better books out there.

    Being able to empathise with your womyn is a good thing to do.
     
  6. MikeE

    MikeE Hip Forums Supporter HipForums Supporter

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    Liver Sam,

    Congratulations!

    [Edit - my first responce to this thread belonged in the Men's Issues, so I started a thread there]
     
  7. Liver Steam

    Liver Steam Member

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    I am totally aware that this is all about her, perhaps it was a bad idea to have come here for advice.

    quote: your girlfriend

    Not trying to start any bullshit, but may I ask why the word girlfriend is italizied?
     
  8. Levi

    Levi Hip Forums Supporter HipForums Supporter

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    I wish that you had asked, "What can I do to be supportive?" Here's my advice:

    If she does get emotional, try to be understanding and supportive.

    Let her know that you're happy about this baby.

    Let her know that you think she's beautiful, and that the sight of her carrying your child is a beautiful thing.

    Reassure her that you love her and the baby.

    DON'T bitch about the sacrifices you might have to make. (For example, if later on in the pregnancy she gets worn out easily from, oh I don't know, carrying another person in her belly, don't complain about her not doing as much work as she once did.)

    Enjoy your sleep now. Some of those babies can keep you up at night.

    Congratulations.:)
     
  9. Sage-Phoenix

    Sage-Phoenix Imagine

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    Congrats and good luck :)
     
  10. Maggie Sugar

    Maggie Sugar Senior Member

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    Dude, I didn't mean to offend you too much (although I was probably still steamed from your lack of empathy for that poor child with anorexia, and your "have a sammich" post) You post came out sounding like, "What bad things am I gonna have to put up with now that she's pregnant?" Forgive me if that was not your intent. That was the way it looked, and I was not the only one to view it that way.

    There is a Father's thread in the Men's Issue's Forum and in Parenting you may want to visit.

    Why did I italicize the word "girlfriend" well, I guess becase SHE is the pregnant one. She's the one who will have the agony of labor, she will have the swollen legs and feet, she's the one who will puke her guts out, she's the one who has a chance of dying during the pregnancy and birth, she is the one who could lose her uterus in a birth gone bad, she is the one who could have her genitals damaged permanently by an episiotomy, she is the one who will have her body changed, no matter how the birth goes, for life ect.

    IF you really are interested in what she is going through as a dad and as a lover, than I apologise. Your posts in the past have not been becons of empathy. I hope, maybe that will change, because if you and she love each other, she will REALLY need you, as a partner and the baby will really need you as a father. Babies need daddies, if possible.

    There is a new website, that I have not reviewed yet, but was refered to me by a very good source, if you are interested you may want to check it out. I hope your concern leads to good things. :) www.Newdads.com

    Let us know if you like the site.
     
  11. IronGoth

    IronGoth Newbie

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    I give you the credit that you asked the questions. Most men don't. They just quietly drink.
     
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