What advice would you give younger generations?

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I think this is a good one!

 

Don't procrastinate.

 

there are only 2 certainties in life, death and taxes, everything else you have a choice over, make those choices wisely!

 

Brilliant advice they're Phil.
For me today my advice to the younger generation would go like this:

Never borrow money from anyone you know.
Especially family.
Never lend money to from anyone you know.
Especially family.
Never trust anyone.
Never smoke.

 

to update how sam clemins said it: believe half of what you experience yourself and none of what anyone else tries to tell you.
also "good advice costs nothing and its worth the price"
but mostly stay curious, don't discard your imagination, don't trust your emotions, but accept that you have them,
and actually look (and analyze) what you're seeing, instead of what someone else tells you you're looking at.
exercize caution in all things, but be ready to take unhesitatingly what logical and considerate path becomes clear to you.
also you were born, you live, you will make mistakes, they come with the territory, but you can always get back up, and sooner or later, one way or another, you always will.
basically you live in a universe, that owes nothing to what people tell each other, owes nothing to any of them or you, isn't always fair, but is always impartial.
what isn't known isn't known, but the diversity of its wonders are worth living to explore. and there may be gods or a god, but they owe nothing to what anyone thinks they know either.
reality throws curve balls, and there's always infinity minus one other possibilities.
don't let anyone tell you what is broken can't be fixed, but it may take longer then any one of us lives for it to be.
longer then any one of us lives does not equal for ever. things that have been a certain way for hundreds or even thousands of years, can change suddenly and without prior notice.
odds are good that most of them won't do so dramatically at any one time, just don't ever count on anything not ever doing so.
in spite of there being no certainties, the odds are pretty good you'll get along just fine without them.
and there is always more scenery to see, more to learn, explore, create and build.

 

there are two mistakes made by ego, that no amount of age or experience are insurance against repeating.
one is believing you know the limits of the diversity of what is possible.
the other, is believing someone else does.

 

I'd agree with that, especially the smoking, I've been at it for about thiry years and just can't give it up, unfortunately.

 

Yes Phil.
If there is one thing I am really pleased with in my life it is the fact that I never did start to smoke.
Let me tell you a little story.
When I was aged 12 my Father found out (don’t ask me how) that I had smoked a couple of fags.
He sat me down one day and said:
‘Kenneth. I hear you have been smoking.
So you want to smoke do you?
Right.
He used to smoke a pipe, which he lit up.
He put the pipe in my mouth and said Kenneth have a good drag in on that.
I was sucking in on the ruddy thing as he encouraged me on to the point I had to rush to the toilet and be sick.

That taught me a lesson I never have forgot and it put me off ever trying to smoke again.
This even though my first Wife of 13 years smoked 30 to 40 fags a day.

I am so pleased he did that as I would likely be dead now if I had started to properly smoke.

Mind you.
If a parent was to do that nowadays the Social Services would be round like a shot and dad would have likely be prosecuted.

But as far as I am concerned he was being cruel to be kind, and good on him.

Unfortunately he has long passed away.

 

Oddly enough something similar happened to me, I was about 14 and the old chap was repairing the roof on our bungalow, he'd got me up there helping him, anyway he pulls his fags out of his pocket and takes one out, then tells me to go down and light it off the gas stove, apparently he's lost his lighter. I go down and light this thing on the stove, I'm coughing and choking trying not to throw up, it's awful, I never touch another one after that.
Fast forward 7 years, I'm 21 and out having a drink with the old chap, we're in my local, by now him and my mam have divorced and he's living across town. We sit and chat and drink, he occasionally smokes a fag, at some point he reaches into the pack, it's empty, ' go grab me a pack from the shop son' he asks, there's a machine in the pub but he won't pay the higher price. I walk next door to the shop and for some odd reason ask for 40 B&H (Benson and Hedges), I put 0ne pack in my jacket pocket and on getting back to the pub I give him the other, later on I'm round at a mates house, we're in the garage and I'm doing a repair on his car, 'get me a lighter mate'I ask, he nips into the house and comes back with a box of matches, he never asks why I want them, I assume he thinks I need them for the heatshrink I'm applying to the cables or something. 'I'll go grab a beer, want one?' he asks, I nod and off he goes back to the house, this is where it all gets rather odd.
I take out the pack of fags and open it, stick one in my mouth and light it, I take a long drag, no coughing, spluttering, nothing, I carry on working, my mate returns with the beers and sees smoke coming from out of the boot, 'bloody hell, the car's on fire' he yells. I stick my head out of the boot, 'where, what fire?' he looks at me, 'how long have you been smoking?' he asks, I look at the fag in my hand somewhat puzzled, 'oh this, I just started' I reply taking a long drag on it followed by a gulp of the beer.
I smoked from then on although it was some time before my mother found out, she found a pack on my dressing table and asked who they belonged to. I packed in once, for about 6 weeks, I was well pleased, then one night I was sitting at home with the wife, we had a couple of visitors and we were all having a beer, I still had no urge to smoke, great. There was a knock on the door and my wife answered it, 'no, I won't tell him, tell him that yourself' I heard her telling whoever was at the door, the lounge door opened, it was a cousin of mine, he told me my brother had died, that did it. 'Give me a fag somebody' I yelled, 'but you don't smoke' I heard someone reply, 'look give me an effing fag before someone gets hurt' I growled, fags were handed to me from all directions, I sat quietly, growling occasionally as I smoked a couple and that was it, I've never been able to give them up, it's horrible, it's like being a drug addict, I can't really afford them but what can I do?
I tried the patches, they made my arm numb, I tried the chewing gum, that upsets my stomach, I tried the tablets, they gave me nightmares, something to do with my PTSD, apparently.I tried ordinary gum, that just gave me wind, then I tried sweets, all that acheived was I was eating a fivers worth a day and still smoking!

 

Thank you for telling us about you'r very interesting life experiences there Phil.
In life everyone has experiences at a particular time in life which have far reaching further consequences.

My biggest and most rewarding experience was meeting and Marrying my third Wife.
One way and another she steadied me up and made me a better person I do believe.

 

Thanks, I think we can all learn from the experiences of others, sometimes you can hear how someone made a mistake and avoid doing the same yourself.
Many years ago I didn't really understand the meaning of safe sex, one day I was giving this woman one in her lounge, she was single, she said, anyway midway through her husband walked in!
I understood the meaning of practising safe sex after that, lock the bloody door. lol

 

You always remind me of some incident in my life as well Phil, but mine wasn’t quite as dangerous as yours.
During one of my periods I was divorced I was in the lounge of a Woman I had been dating for a couple of weeks.
We were in her lounge sitting on her setee and I had my pants down to my ankles as she was giving me he most brilliant blow job.
Her 15 year old daughter was out but we didn’t hear her come back home and she opened the lounge door.
I was just finishing shooting my load all over her happy face!

Her Daughter said ‘Oh! Sorry and left the room.
Oh! Dear.
How embarrassing!
That was the end of what might have been a lovely relationship.
But now I will never know!

...

But yes.
My advice would be to the younger generation same as yours.
Lock the ruddy door!

 

When all this is over we're really going to have to meet up for a pint, I mean you're only up the road from me.

 

That sounds good to me Phil.
Obviously I live in Colwyn Bay/Rhos On Sea, but were are you roughly?

 

I really can understand the misery of trying to get rid of an addiction. I spent 26 years chasing that feeling of my first beer. What finally worked was a good solid dose of a twelve step program...and even with 30 years sober I know it’s still one day at a time. I’ve had many friends tell me that quitting smoking was more difficult than quitting drinking. My trip to rehab provided me with a view of other drunks and counselors crammed together in the smoking room where the visibility was about 2 feet. I also learned the apt term for many of us was “trading deck chairs on the Titanic. Good luck with your efforts and support from others might help some.

 

Newton le Willows, nr Haydock

 

Thanks for the info Phil.
I look forward to a meet up!
Mine is a pint of best bitter thank you very much!