The Hormone Guide

The Hormone Guide

Women will understand this and the men should memorize it!


Every woman knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!

DANGEROUS:​

SAFER:​

SAFEST:​

ULTRA SAFE:​

What's for dinner?​

Can I help you with dinner?​

Where would you like to go for dinner?​

Here, have some wine. ​

Are you wearing that?​

Wow, you sure look good in brown!​

WOW! Look at you!​

Here, have some wine​

What are you so worked up about?​

Could we be overreacting?​

Here's my paycheck.​

Here, have some wine.​

Should you be eating that?​

You know, there are a lot of apples left.​

Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that?​

Here, have some wine.​

What did you DO all day?​

I hope you didn't over-do it today.​

I've always loved you in that robe!​

Here, have some wine. ​

​

 

But I don't like wine...

 

PMS makes women look irresistibly cute.

 

Are you mad or just trying to score browny points with the ladies here?

 

That would pretty much do it with KC too. swap wine for beer and you about have it.

 

No, no. I'm mad alright.

My madness consisting of being unable to take things seriously for long.

But that's probably not wholly accurate either.

 

hehe

 

Frenchie gets mad at me when I start laughing at her PMS antics.

She yells at me and punches me and all the rest.

Of course I just see it as hot foreplay.

 

Laughing is something I may have done in the past but as the years roll on the seriousness of the PMS gets worse. Laughing is well in the days of the past. It's morphed into spoiling her and letting her deal with it in the ways she can. I used to look at PMS as an excuse for a woman to be a bitch. Being I have been on both sides of the coin with KC and have seen it develop into something more serious, I have learned the error of my ways.
Every woman is different though.

 

I see.

So you try to be supportive within limits.

Did I get that right?

 

For some resaon I imagine you to be alot like Homer Simpson..

 

Cars, boats and planes (except for the vintage Cessna I used to fly) may also elevate a woman's hormone levels.

 

PMS? I swear it doesn't exist with me.

 

Awesome!!!
Consider you a lucky one. KC used to be completely unaffected till she had kids. That changed things.

 

Yeah, that's exactly what my mother tells me. "That could all change in a moment's notice. Just you wait until your body chances, etc."

 

I'm here to tell you that KC was the most blessed being when it came to PMS. Never ever an issue. Things changed and now it hits her like a brick wall. This all just happened fairly recently too.
She's still an angel and never a nasty word out of her but it definitely takes it's toll on her.
I feel for the ladies that go through this.

 

I really don't know what it's like. The pain, the misery, any of that.

Does KC take her vitamin Bs?

 

Probably not like we/she should. We threw our last bottle out because it contained guarna. WTF???

 

Guacamole. Give her guacamole two weeks before her period, it should help.

 

hmmm,
I hear sex helps too... oh and beer, I hear beer helps. so beer guac and sex. I'll see what I can do.