Please help!!!!

When i am out my thoughts race, im extremely conscious of what others are thinking of me and basically i just can't calm down.
It is totally ruining my life as i never go out incase someone says something or something bad happens. i can't hold conversations with strangers incase they judge me or make me feel stupid etc. Basically i am terrorfied of people and their judgements of me.
I know this is probarbly what would be termed social anxiety disorder but that changes nothing for me.

Any advice? anyone else experiencing this? Please help!!

 

you need to take charge and say FUCK IT.

do what makes you happy in any situation. when you start being you and not giving a fuck what other may think or say you will be more happy than you ever could imagine. doesnt matter the day, time, or place, dont let it ruin your life that is a horrible thing. i suggest you slap yourself and enjoy each moment.

COMMON!

 

grow dreads and invite judgement and laugh at all who judge you

realize your worth is solely dependent on your self, not on anything anyone else thinks of you

in addition to that..do something..anyuthing that makes u feel good about being you..wether its a secret thing or something more open..
so you can say well fine ya judge me for........ but at least i know (whatever u do) makes a difference ..or ...i know im not being very clear..im tired but if u wanna tallk we can

ive noticed you have ..well your name says it all..an awakening spirit, and thats something to be proud of that can make you imunune to jusgement....how can others judgement of you hurt you when you have unseeen inner light?
judgement is only possible when they are blind to what lies deeper then whayt yhey see

 

I cant say I/ve experienced that, but I think the reason that you have this fear is because you are not comfortable with your self yet. So take sometime to think about what youre doing and who you are, and maybe fix a few problems and all that jazz. Obviously you can withstand some, seeing as you posted here for us to judge you. But the main thing is, if you are cool with who you are, you wont care what other people think because you are fine, thats the way its gotta be.

 

Thanks.
I try this. Every other day i tell myself that that i am going to attempt to change, but then i get out there and my thoughts race and i just lose control.
Yes i need a slap, and a bloody good one! What i do each day is so ridiculous, i know.
In the end what does it matter that someone doesn't like me. I don't even care about trying to fit in and impress anymore, but i can't seem to move past the fear that people are judging me.
I just feel so insecure when im on my own, like im totally open for attack. its horrible

 

nobody controls your life but you.

 

I used to have that same problem when I was about your age because I was picked on and made fun of for most of my life. You just have to become secure with yourself and realize that all of our quirks are what makes us wonderful.

Like I always say...."You're not normal if you're not weird". Only by embracing your "faults" will you realize that they aren't really faults at all; they're just individual traits that make you human and you'd just be another drone without them. Be proud of what you are and embrace your individuality.

As far as what people think of you.....it doesn't matter, in the least. What matters is the way you feel about yourself.

 

Exactly. I know this, and i love this, and trust me i am not the sort that ever tries to blame anyone else. Thats why in annoys me so much because i know that it is me doing this to myself but i just don't know why. I know that its me that refuses to go outside, why good grief, i could step out the door right now, but yet i don't. I know that it is me that starts up the racing thoughts, or am i going to suggest someone is pulling wires in my brain?

Thanks so much for the advice everyone. I just never really thought of myself as insecure, quite the contrary, i would have said i was the most secure i've been in years. Even so, now i'm going to have to think about that because all of you are very right, i obviously am not comfortable with myself because if i was this should not be happening.

 

Perhaps you should find a friend like topnotchstoner?

And actually, I know what you're going through, I used to be like that, afraid to do anything, go anywhere, be around people. And eventually I changed pretty much my whole life and it's quite the opposite now and has been for years... you just gotta go for it, change one thing at a time, do things that will make you more calm, more content, do more constructive things that will not give you a chance to worry. Good luck.

 

girl you need to take the chance. if you always worrie about shit like this getting to you it will always GET WORSE (i dont know you personally, but still). now i know you dont want it to. if you want to go do something (from your innerself that you know will bring that natural smile) then go do it. for all we know we only live once. so please do what makes YOU happy. if you dont act on your own feelings you will be scared shitless and sad for life. like i said above do what makes YOU HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!

god dammet fuck what anyone thinks. you are your own person and nothing can take that from you.

 

I like what soaring eagle said too... grow some dreads and some ovaries at the same time.

 

Thanks. All of you are so damn right and its crazy that it takes for several people to say the obvious before i hear it. Guess people just need constant reminders to remember

 

Been there, done that.

Since I really don't have anything to loose now, I am going to give you the straight dope on what is going on.

You are already defined. The entirety of you is whole and complete.

We see ourselves in other people. The other people are not seeing you and judging you. You are seeing yourself in others and you are judging yourself.

You see even if I am wrong. What other people think of you is none of your business.

The truth is they are way to busy dealing with their own insecurities to be worried about you.

Do you know anyone who has ever done anything major in life has had others think they are crazy? Yup, every dam one of them.

Did the other people judging them affect their success? No.

Judgements only work if we buy into them.

A judgement is only an opinion.

Now I could go into the consolidating of your auric field and a whole lot of other spiritual mumbo jumbo. But why bother.

Someones opinion of you has no bearing on your life. Unless you let it.

Your opinion of yourself does matter.

 

*standing ovation*

excellant, excellant post! I just wish someone would have given me that speech when I was 16, but alas there was a journey I had to go through to get to this space and it is well appreciated now that I'm over...that. You will be soon, if that post didn't move you, nothing will.

 

I dont think strangers give a damn how you talk or look..I was like that years ago, you'll learn not to give a shit.

 

this is dead on. no one gives a shit about anyone but themselves, so why worry? I had a bit of social and public anxiety a few years back, it was no good. now I find the less I care about what people think, the happier I am.

if someone's going to judge me, they can fuck off outta my face anyways. I don't associate with that sort of people; the kind who'll drag you down and make you miserable, tell you you can't do this or that, projecting their own insecurities onto you, especially if you want to do something they would never dare to.

 

Yes, humans blow ass and you shouldn't give two shits what they think of you...

But you yourself are going to have to get over this... No magical verbal or written sentence will make you feel or see differently then what you have written above, you are going to have to work on focusing on more important things then what complete strangers think of you... Good luck...

 

I went to see an Aboriginal elder once when I was pretty mentally and emtionally fucked up. He told me, after many many hours of stories and a ceremonial sweat (when I was ready to hear it I think) People will always think you are shit, all you have is YOU! YOU must take care of you.

 

I'll take the middle of the road. All of us care about what others think. It is normal to try and make a good impression.


The difference lies in whether you derive your self-worth from yourself or from others.

And, yeah, I'm big on social anxiety.

Also: I advise non-reaction when dealing with feelings. Don't try to stop it, don't cling to it.

 

I'll take the middle of the road. All of us care about what others think. It is normal to try to make a good impression.


The difference lies in whether you derive your self-worth from yourself or from others.

And, yeah, I'm big on social anxiety. So I understand you. A lot of us do.

Also: I advise non-reaction when dealing with feelings. Don't try to stop it, don't cling to it.