Long Distant Relationships

Hello
Im currently dating this guy, who i met through my best friend (he is also her best guy friend) now he is in the Army, im all new to the long distance thing. He gets out next November which is not far away.
He tells me he loves me, and that we will be together for a while and that im the best thing thats ever happened to him. How come i worry soo much? I dont know why im thinking the things i think, like i dont hear from him all day which is fine because i know he is at work, but the other day i didnt hear from him all day and then i sent him a message after i finished work, and he wrote back saying "just talking to the boys babe" how come i felt that i wasnt important? Am i being greedy??
I have had many relationships and been cheated on all the time and been treated like crap
i do worry when he goes out with the boys as with my previous r.s thats when the guy would cheat on me.. but why should i worry when he hasnt given me any reason that he would cheat...

Just wanted to know if there is anyone who has had a long distance r.s whether they felt the things i am currently feeling and how they overcame it? He reassures me all the time, i just dont know what my problem is..

Thanks

 

Its time to work on yourself with reassurance and understanding that this is new. I'm not saying push things aside , but you need to release what has happened to you and let it go its not always easy easier said then done because if you don't how will this NEW relationship work out if you have all this tension built up inside you. Best thing to do is have open communication.


I know that when i had LDR with my Boyfriend (now my husband) i had a lot of issues. i mean psychological issues etc you name it i had it. I just got out of a VERY abusive relationship and i didn't know... you know what a REAL relationship was. MOST of my relationships were being pushed hit kicked yelled at. Please make sure your open w/ him and allow him to be open with you . Just have understanding as well. Don't say i expect you to tell me . Just say i would like our relationship and/or friendship to have open communication. hopefully he'll understand. Journalize, meditate. listen to positive music.

T

 

Hey there thanks for the reply.
He knows my past etc and my relationships were exactly like yours, like we see to have a good communication with each other he even told me i wont worry so much once i realise he isn like my exs which is prob true. I feel as if i dont talk to him everyday, he looses interest in me, which is my insecureness (if thats a word)
I guess i just want us to work soo much and it seems as though me worrying about every little detail will probably no doubt come in the way. We had a discussion about me worrying and stuff he told me it shows him that i care but he also said that he doesnt want our relationship revolve around me worrying, he said that whenever he tells me he is going out with the boys my tone changes, which i dont think it does but hey i probably wouldnt know. He also says that he is worried when he goes out as well about me and also said along the lines that he sometimes isnt himself when he goes out as he is worried that it will pee me off, i said to him im not there..
Ive tried to let go, tried very hard, im just very insecure expecially being new to long distant relationships.
Ive started to do dancing and sport three times a week which will get my mind off things a bit.
Never done meditation though?

 

Sounds like you've got a keeper there! I was going through the same thing with my boyfriend, i was so in love with him i was always worried about losing him. But ive been with him for 2 years and now i know i have nothing to worry about. You just need to learn to trust him, hes with you and no one else because he wants to be so stop fretting and just enjoy having a great guy in your life.

 

Yeah thanks heaps for your reply.
Since posting this last week ive really tamed down a bit with the whole worrying.
He keeps reasurring me so thanks heaps for your opinion on it all.