Fate’s left hand knocked over my cup, Spilled the wine on the gown Running reds In folding streams. To drown, Going down. I paced along the walls of melted rooms down on the floor. Molded lips with the girl, Who did not frown, Glanced at the stain then danced around. That’s when the world responded. Damned fate because she’s easy, Leaking heart afdsgfdasgwdagjds FUCK I GIVE UP. i cant finish it and i hate it. I have the ideas, and the emotion but my flow is on a god damn strike!
htank you, i appreciate the support. I've been lying in bed feeling completely .... limp as a person. my emotions are chipping away at my words...ironically
hey thats actually kinda cool........... you could end your poem that way..... damned fate, shes easy........shes lying awake ...feeling limp..... her emotions are chipping away at her words..
What you have there is great, one of the best poems I've read in a long while. But as you said, it's not quite finished yet, I refuse to sleep, waiting on life to redress the empty slot within my chest. is a great way to end it, but there should be more between this and what you wrote before. Of course, you could just end it like this and it would work nicely as well, but would create a completly different effect than the one you were going for (I think). Doesn't really matter... Whatever you choose, this is one cool poem
I'm definately going to work on it. Today is a new day! my eyes are glazed from the sleep and I'ma lreday thinking poetry. I love this obsession. In fact, i love you all. yes you
