I was hooked on oxycontins for about a year, survived the withdrawls cold turkey style, managed to stay clean for about 4 months afterwards, but then slipped up and got sucked into black tar habit that I've been struggling with for about a year. I am trying to quit. I haven't used in about 24 hours, and for some reason I am not feeling any symptoms of the deathdrawls yet and normally I will start feeling them between 14-16 hours after my last use. Although I don't feel so bad I'm wondering how bad it is going to get. my metabolism is off the hook, i've always had to struggle to maintain/gain weight, which I think is helping with the withdrawls. my boyfriend uses the same amount as I do and he has been hurting since last night. I don't know if I can kick this habit. even if i get through the withdrawls without relapsing i feel like i have almost fallen in love with this drug, not just the effect it has on me, but i miss the routeine of meeting up with my dealers/friends, its like, I'm almost attracted to the romanticism of the lifestyle. and as stupid as it sounds i feel like i love the junkie community. i can't do this for the rest of my life. I can't. but I don't know if I can kick it either. I don't know if its even possible. Not reallys ure what I'm looking for in response. I just don't know what to do.
There are two parts to breaking this addiction: the physical addiction and the habit. For the physical the recommended way by doctors I'd to wean yourself down. I've seen people successfully do this by subtracting 5mg a day or slower. Adding methadone in it's place temporarily will assist jsut be careful not to get hooked on that. The second part is the habit. Unfortunately you will have to change your routine. Sometimes this is jsut as hard. If you know someone with suboxone or can get into a program that drug is a miracle. Just don't snort it due to naxolyne content.
i've had to kick black tar a few times, never shot it once in my life...but it's gotten bad for me.....to the point of yelling at my fiance at the time( the only person willing to help me at all) to just leave me the fuck alone, and all kinds of creude shit....recently ive started to dabble with H again, i've been making sure not to use more thena few days ina row though....
Thats perfectly normal. I know how you feel. There are many ways you can get through this. Do you have the motivation? If not, seek the psychedelic experience. Thats the best advice I can give from personal experience.
