If Women Ruled ....

Women with cold hands would give men prostate exams.

PMS would be a legitimate defense in court.

Men would get reputations for sleeping around.

'Singles' bars would have metal detectors to weed out men hiding wedding rings in their pockets.

A man would no longer be considered a 'good catch' simply because he is breathing.

Fewer women would be dieting because their ideal weight standard would increase by 20 kg.

Shopping would be considered an aerobic activity.

Men would not be allowed to eat gas-producing foods within two hours of bedtime.

Men would be secretaries for female bosses, working twice as hard for none of the credit.

Little girls would read Snow White and the Seven Hunks.

Men would bring drinks, chips and dips to women watching soap operas.

Men would have to get Playboy for the articles, because there would be no pictures.

Men would learn phrases like: 'I'm sorry,' 'I love you,' 'Sure we can talk. Is now okay?'

Men would be judged entirely by their looks, women by their accomplishments.

Men would wonder what WE are thinking.

Men would pay as much attention to their woman as their computer.

Road rage would turn in on oneself.

Men would work on relationships as much as they work on their careers.

Men would divide up chores with women so WOMEN could be horny.

TV news segments on sport would never run longer than one minute.

All men would be forced to spend one month in a PMS simulator.

During mid-life crisis, men would get hot flushes and women would date 19-year-olds.

Overweight men would have their weight brought to their attention constantly.

After a baby is born, men would take six weeks paternity leave to wait on their wives hand and foot.

For basic training, soldiers would have to take care of a two year-old for six weeks.

 

waits for the response from iron goth...

 

i vote bedlam for god..
i agree the world would be a better place if women ruled.. but i guess there would be a well deserved period of revenge

 

haha...you obviously didnt live in the UK under Maggie thatcher..!!!!!

 

couldnt be worse then bush!!

i'm just speaking in general..ofcourse individual personalities have theyre own issues, but women would be more likely to react emotionaly, meanning more likely to care more about human rights then $, more likely to care for the environment then corporate greed, education then gun rights, peace then war..

but ofcourse everyone has ytheyre own unique personality & opinions that affect how they woud rule

 

hahaha, did you make this up??
Its PURE genius!!!!!
good one!

 

i do think the pms simulation would be an excellent idea, though. it's so much easier to understand when you've experienced it. i lived in terror of my mother, completely in the dark about what the fuck was wrong with her, until i started getting pms. then i understood. it WAS easier to stay patient, once you got what the hell was going on. but by the same toke, women wouldn't be able to get away with as much, since i do know for a fact that women use pms as an excuse to let loose with all the crap that's been festering. that's just bad behavior.

 

In the UK i think suffering from PMS IS a legal defence... i could be wrong here but i think i'm right....

 

well now they got that pill that lets u pms every 3-4 months, eventualy they'll have 1 that stretches it to every 4 years.. they should be reqquired to pms right before elections so we see them at theyre worse..& the rest of theyre term they'd be relativeily rational..lol

 

if temporary insanity ensues due to profound hormonal imbalances (has to be medically shown) it can sometimes work as a legal defense.

 

Women with cold hands would give men prostate exams.

--my husband's was conducted by a very big, very indelicate man who very nearly got his ass beat, but thankfully dave's mother was a nurse in his office and managed to haul dave out of there. lol. though a pap is done much more often. i like the "manogram" idea: search for testicular cancer the same way they search for breast cancer. i bet they'll come up with better options then...

Men would get reputations for sleeping around.

well now, they do. but women are typically too desperate for a man to care and spend more time gossipping hatefully about that "slut" than the boys do. they're talking about sports more often...

'Singles' bars would have metal detectors to weed out men hiding wedding rings in their pockets.

dave was hit on by a woman who shortly thereafter DROPPED her wedding ring on the floor, much to her eternal embarassment, and dave's ego boost.

A man would no longer be considered a 'good catch' simply because he is breathing.

well now, that's a woman's problem. not enough men to go around...

Fewer women would be dieting because their ideal weight standard would increase by 20 kg.

since the fashion industry is primarily run by gay men and self-loathing women, that's not really the guys' problem. most of the men i know prefer a little more natural figure on a woman. women will tell you again and again that they really dress up for women. men are terrifyingly easy to impress, i think, and rarely spare more than a moment's thought on what your ass looks like in those jeans unless you have a SPECTACULAR ass. and those spectacular ones usually have a little jiggle to them.

Shopping would be considered an aerobic activity.

it is an aerobic activity.

Men would not be allowed to eat gas-producing foods within two hours of bedtime.

women fart too. we just usually do it in our sleep, when we're unaware. ask your man, he'll tell you all about it. but he's refrained from doing so in order to spare your feelings.

Men would be secretaries for female bosses, working twice as hard for none of the credit.

there are some...but most men prefer other occupations. i've dealt with office women before. just because they're willing to accept a lower standard of pay and treatment means nothing to me. i lost all pity for them when they assumed i fucked my boss for a paycheck. fuck 'em all.

Men would bring drinks, chips and dips to women watching soap operas.

you know, the only time i've ever done this for dave was when i was in a good mood and wanted to. it's reciprocation.

Men would have to get Playboy for the articles, because there would be no pictures.

the pictures in playboy suck anyway. i prefer maxim, it's funnier and the chicks are thicker. you know, perfect 10 magazine has all natural models. now THEY tick me off, because i don't feel the need to compete with installed tits and lipoed asses. but the perfect 10 models are naturally perfect. i hate them all. though i subscribe religiously.

Men would learn phrases like: 'I'm sorry,' 'I love you,' 'Sure we can talk. Is now okay?'

they can do that now, just not during football. you don't like him to talk over your shows, do you?

Men would be judged entirely by their looks, women by their accomplishments.

ah, c'mon now, i would never have married a man i found to be unsexy. it's a fine balance of what you want...

Men would wonder what WE are thinking.

they do, and they file it under inexplicable and get over it. they don't obsess like we do.

Road rage would turn in on oneself.

i had to go to counselling for road rage. women are psycho-bitches on the road, too. i don't think that's a gender thing.

Men would work on relationships as much as they work on their careers.

for men, workign on their careers is an aspect of working on their relationships. it's what they do. they start to ignore their relationships when they become intolerable and they don't know how to get out.

Men would divide up chores with women so WOMEN could be horny.

well, i guess this applies to women who work outside the home, sinc eour division of labor is pretty equal, though dave's definitely the harder worker right now.

During mid-life crisis, men would get hot flushes and women would date 19-year-olds.

women's sex drive increases. what we do with it is our choice. but if we're too scared of what other people think to live for ourselves, how is that a man's problem?

Overweight men would have their weight brought to their attention constantly.

they do. did you know male anorexia is drastically on the rise? i think that's a bad thing, personally.

 

This is such sexist bs. It portrays women as victimized and perfect and men as if its their faults for everything stupid thing and only their faults.

 

"if women ruled the world" : tsk tsk tsk , this is not your world is it?, SUCKS FOR YOU! us men are the rulers

 

lol

 

*sighs* What a wonderful world it would be.

 

Ah, where would men be without women?



Well.....apparently...still in the fucking Garden of Eden......

 

if you believe that sort of male propaganda. at least eve was fooled by a deity...adam just followed the pussy...

 

nah, i don't subscribe to it at all......i was quoting summit i read years ago millions do tho'

 

lol. there's amazing links to various goddess religions throughout the whole eden story. but personally, it sounds like eve still had to work, gathering food for adam and all. don't see why i'm supposed to cry over a man having to get out into the fields and toil and labor.

 

There is? I'm familiar with the Lilith story in many abrahanic traditions....but no others, must read up on that sometime

yup, and for us in a christienised society.....many will always see it as so...

I don't either...and i've never understood it...last time i looked at a lass she had arms, hands and a back muscles.....making her more than capable of swinging a shovel.....men allowed themselves to be conned just as much as women