when i was a wee little man.. probably around the age of 8 or 9.. i heard a story.. and it came from an old western movie which i watched(i used to love cowboy films). i hadn't thought about it for years and then showmet suddenly made me think about it for some reason... now im not particularly good at tell ing stories but its quite short so there is not much room for error. well... there was once this little bird sat in his nest waiting for his mothere to come home with a worm or 2 for dinner, when the wind suddenly began to pick up and start blowing harder than the little bird expected. in a state of terror( and because he was a small bird) all he could do was shout. "CHEEP, CHEEP!! CHEEP, CHEEP!!" and then suddenly a gust of wind took him from out of his nest and he tumbled to the floor, right next to a cow. cold and scared the little bird started crying," CHEEP,CHEEP!! CHEEP, CHEEP!!" the cow turned round to see what was making the noise and saw, there on the ground a tiny little bird, all fragile and cold. so the cow turned round and dumped a massive cow pat on his head. the bird, now quite warm but stinking of shit is not best pleased with his situation so again cries out "CHEEP, CHEEP!!! CHEEP, CHEEP!!" and he gets the attention of a passing fox. the fox seeing this poor little bird neck deep in cow shit offers his assistance. "would you like me to help you out of that pile of shit you've found yourself in?" the little bird hearing these words cheeped for joy " CHEEP, CHEEP!!! CHEEP, CHEEP!!!" " ok " said the fox " let me get you out of there" and before the bird could even cheep a thankyou the fox had swallowed him whole and was trotting, full on birdie, off into the sunset. the end and the moral of this story is... not evry1 who puts you in the shit is trying to hurt you... and some of those who offer you an easy way out ,dont allways have your intrests at heart.
the cow wasn't being cruel.. he was helping in the only way he new... but i guess the little birdy won't be so ungrateful in future. but there wasn't a need for the fox to be quite that cruel to get his point across.. becuase now the little birdy is not in a position to be able to use the knowledge he has learned.... so what have we learned from this... yes sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind.. but not so cruel as to make the lesson you are teaching impossible to adhere to. oooo.. i need glasses.. grey hair, and a pile of books.. for somewhere in amoungst the bollocks.. there is wisdom.
Shitting on someone's head seems pretty cruel to me... At least, no-one I've ever done it to has been particularly pleased.
but the intention wasn't cruel.. and as the story is a metaphorical analogy.. the discribed scenes are just representations of intention... things like this are not to be taken litterally mr jon... now get to the back of the class.
wow! that was a loverly story, its soooooo cooooool. i love the way it doesnt beat about the bush to get the point across, like some strories with morals do. [of corse the cow had not bush to beat around tough that would be y it used the birdy] i think we should all follow this example an come up with our own cool stori. there once was a mouse named fred. he was the most ambisiusm ouse in the whole of his hole. one day he was feeling particualry ambitius and instead of seateling for a bit of chease he decide to devouwer an entire dairy! as a resut,....fred exploded. the moral to this is dont bite off more than u can chew, ... ......and if u xploade then you probs shudnt eat a dairy!
One day, a horse and a chicken were walking around the farm, when the horse fell into a hole. "Help! I'm in a hole lotta trouble!" Pony_13, reknowned for his crap puns, yelled. The chicken ran around for a while panicking, then found some rope. She threw one end of the rope down to the horse, then tied to other end to the farmer's brand new Jaguar XJ. The horse was able to climb out of the hole, and was very happy. The next day, they were walking again. This time, the chicken fell down the hole. "Help!" The chicken yelled. "I've fallen down the hole!" The horse went to get the rope, but then turned around and looked at the hole. He edged ever closer to the edge of the hole, then turned around and dangled his willy down the hole. "Here...grab this!" The horse yelled. The chicken grabbed the horse's trouser truncheon, and the horse yanked the chicken up and out of the hole. The moral of the story is... If you're hung like a horse, you don't need a flash car to pull the birds
Another bullshit story One week before christmas a bull and a turkey were were chillin in a field next to a huge oak tree. The Turkey looks up to the top of the tree and says,"man it would be so cool if i could climb to the top of that, i could see for miles, it'd be sweet, but i just haven't got the strength". The bull replied," this may sound a bit silly but if you eat some of this it'll give you strength, its full of nutrients and goodness!" and like his wife from the first story squeezes out a huge dumpo all over the birds head. The turkey having no choice but to eat his way out frowns at the bull and says,"oh man thats discracefull but i may as well give it ago now". He starts to climb the tree and gets alot higher than he'd ever expected,"wow i think you may have a point here", he says looking down from halfway up the big oak. The next day he eats some more of the brown goodness from the bulls arse, and to his amazemnt reaches the top of the tree. The farmer spots him from another field and says, so thats where the little bastards been hiding and shoots him dead with one shot from his viscious gun. The moral being: Bullshit may get you to the top but it rarely keeps you there!
