I need some advice. Please read

Discussion in 'Lesbian, Gay, Bi, Trans, etc.' started by king87, Feb 17, 2010.

  1. king87

    king87 Member

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    Basically about 2 years ago, I started chatting to this guy on facebook.. anyways he said he was bisexual.. and that he was in an open relationship.. he says he would like to try it with me.. and I want to, but cause of him having another bf.. I dont want to.. Also I noticed that he has pics on him on facebook, snogging other girls and he already has a kid back home.. Im not even sure if he is really bi even though he says he is.. Im really falling for the guy.. and wen I see pics of him snogging other women.. I kinda feel awful.. like a jelousey type of way.. Im thinking of just losing conact with the guy.. cause I fancy him so bad.. wat should I do? btw I seen the guy on cam.. he is older than me too. (not that much older than me like 6 years)
     
  2. Gedio

    Gedio Member

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    Either take him off his current partner or cut off contact. I really don't know what advice to give other than either do it or don't.
     
  3. MissBHave

    MissBHave insert clever phrase here

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    Trust your insticts man
    They are shouting RED FLAG!!!!
    Listen to them
     
  4. king87

    king87 Member

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    Hey

    How are you? Thanks for replying to my wall post. I think I will have to cut all contact with him, as you say. It will probabaly take me a while to get over it, but I should be okay.
     
  5. king87

    king87 Member

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    Yep red flag as in to cut all contact with them.. hope you are all well
     
  6. MissBHave

    MissBHave insert clever phrase here

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    i would do just that
     
  7. king87

    king87 Member

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    yep :)
     
  8. MissBHave

    MissBHave insert clever phrase here

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    good man ;)
     
  9. Shale

    Shale ~

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    IDK if anyone can advise you. It is your dilemma and only you know what to do about it.

    You have hit on solutions in your post.

    You fancy him badly and feel jealous even tho you are not committed to a relationship yet. That is called infatuation - we all go thru it from time to time.

    And you expressed doubt that he is sincere or honest. Go with your gut on that. To me upfront honesty has been paramont in any relationship - and still we get burned.

    OK, you say you have been chatting the guy for two years - have you ever physically met him? Even just chatting you should know things about him that we don't. You should have gotten those gut level feelings by now, and from what I get in this post you have your doubts about him.

    So, your call.
    ---------------
    EDIT: I started this post at 2 pm but I'm at work and got delayed. By the time I got back and actually posted it, seems everyone else gave the same advice and you (listening to your inner voice) took it.
     
  10. king87

    king87 Member

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    Thanks for the wall post. I think you are also correct, and I think that I can trust the guy as he is slightly older than me.. but then othertimes I dont feel like I can trust him.. maybe its just me/. also I dont understand why i feell jelouse wen I see pics of him snogging other women.. its like my legs go all shakey, fast heart beat etc. I was very tempted to meet up with him and see what he was like.. but dont want to get into any trouble, as his bf could come and see me sometime. im better off, to just quickly delelte his number from my phone and to delete him from my msn.. Itookhim off my facebook, as I couldnt bare to look at his pics on there
     
  11. MissBHave

    MissBHave insert clever phrase here

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    listen to shale
    he be wise
     
  12. king87

    king87 Member

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    :) will do.. its just difficult, if you know wat I mean
     
  13. Shale

    Shale ~

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    Anyone with any experience knows what you mean.

    It is sometimes difficult to make emotions fall in line with our better judgment.
     
  14. king87

    king87 Member

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    yep true. do you think I should say to him, why i am not contacting him anymore? or should I just cut the connection off completely without him knowing?
     
  15. Shale

    Shale ~

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    IDK. Again, your call (or no call :p). You know more about him than we do.

    Personally, if nothing actually connected in two years I would just quietly cut the connection. You have your misgivings about his honesty and the acceptance/good nature of his B/F. All I can say is go with YOUR gut feelings.
     
  16. ilovekush

    ilovekush Member

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    listen to the village wiseman. he know his stuff :p
     
  17. Gedio

    Gedio Member

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    I'm great thanks :D hope you're feeling better.
    I'd say just follow your heart but that tends to confuse a lot of the time, just go with your instincts; you'd be surprised how often they're right.
     
  18. king87

    king87 Member

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    Pleased to hear you been great. Im good thanks :) Just abit down about the whole situation. Im gonna go with me instinct.. like you say : )
     
  19. king87

    king87 Member

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    yep true :)
     
  20. king87

    king87 Member

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    Alright cheers.. gonna go with me instinct and gut feeling.. within the two years of me knowing the guy.. he has wanted to meet up a couple of times.. but he always wants me to go to his place.. which is quite far.. wen I have offered for him to come to mine in the past..he has been too busy.. theres something soo nice about him tho.. like he is kind, freindly, open minded etc
     

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